


Addison's Anatomy / Meredith's Anatomy

by Addie_queen



Category: Grey's Anatomy, Private Practice
Genre: Age Difference, Alternate Universe, Bisexual Addison Montgomery, Bisexual Meredith Grey, Canonical Character Death, F/F, Falling In Love, Fingerfucking, Fluff and Angst, Fluff and Smut, Forbidden Love, Gays Anatomy, Lesbian Sex, Light BDSM, Meddisons, MerAdd, Passion, Roughness, Smut, meddison, merddison
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-07-13
Updated: 2021-01-14
Packaged: 2021-03-05 05:00:10
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 47
Words: 78,607
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25238866
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Addie_queen/pseuds/Addie_queen
Summary: Addison Montgomery and Meredith Grey have had sexual encounters throughout the years but never a relationship. Yet the sex they have is passionate and fierce and far better than the sex they've had with men.This story goes over the times they've been together and studied each others anatomy. They happen throughout the years with no strings attached and secrecy between them. No one knows about their encounters.
Relationships: Meredith Grey/Addison Montgomery
Comments: 92
Kudos: 160





	1. Seattle / Intern Year

Meredith has been feeling a bit lonely after Derek broke up with her so she could be with Finn. The thing he didn't know was that she broke up with Finn to be with Derek. She had ultimately felt bad for Addison since she had no one fully. 

One of those nights she was done early in the evening and she decided she wanted to talk to Addison. She hadn't realized Addison left already so she went to Richard to ask if he knew Addison's room number at the Archfield. He said it was the 22nd floor but he did not know the room number. So Meredith drove to the Archfield but stopped for a bottle of tequila and wine. She knew Addison liked wine so she brought her that as a gift. 

She arrived at the hotel and was in the elevator going up to the 22nd floor. At this point she didn't even know why she was looking for Addison. She opened her bottle of tequila and drank a bit from the bottle. *DING* The elevator opened and she was on her floor but she had no idea of knowing what room was Addison's. She knocked on the first door to her left and Addison opened up. 

"Meredith?" Addison said surprised why the intern was at her room. 

"Doctor Montgomery, hi... um, I brought you this bottle of wine." Meredith said shakily not knowing what to tell Addison as her reason for being here. All she knows is that Addison barely came out of the shower because her hair is all wet and she is wearing a towel robe from the hotel. 

"What are you doing here Grey? I mean isn't it enough that you took my husband and now you came to offer me a consolation prize? Why are you here?" Addison says bluntly.

"No, I didn't come here to offend you. I-I was looking for you after my shift and you weren't there so I thought I'd come and see you here instead." Meredith says.

"You still didn't answer my question Grey. But I guess I'll just let you in then." Addison says as she moves from the door to allow Meredith to come in. 

Meredith passes in and sits at the armchair in the left corner of the room and sets the bottle of wine and the half empty tequila on the table. Addison is pretty confused why Meredith would come visit her now. I mean she did hear about Meredith being single but she knows it wont last. 

"So what is the reason you were looking for me?" Addison asks.

"Okay well here it goes. I... I just wanted to apologize to you, for hurting you. I never knew about you and then I still slept with Derek after I knew. I'm sorry. I just wanted to let you know that." 

"So that was the urgency of your search for me. Wow Grey, I thought it would be more than just that apology, but I accept it. I never did hate you though. Derek loves you, and I hurt him enough for him to walk away." 

Addison grabs the bottle of wine and pours it out for 2 glasses. She hands Meredith one, and they sit in a small awkward silence. Meredith downs her wine then Addison finishes her glass moments after. 

"You know, when I first saw you walking towards us, I thought you looked ravishing and when you said 'Addison Shepherd' I thought to myself on why Derek would be with me when he had his leggy fabulous wife." Meredith says as she grabs the tequila and drinks straight from the bottle. 

"Well to be fair, you didn't know the whole story nor that I existed. Oh thank you for the 'leggy and fabulous' complement?" Addison said as she drank more wine and smiled subtly. 

The pair went on talking about Derek and the Divorce. Then they talked about Mark and finally ended on the topic of men. At this point both of them were really drunk and Addison enjoyed Meredith's company. Though Addison thought of this as a one night experience because she really need to talk and let go. 

(Distinct giggles were shared and bad sex stories were being shared.)

"I know... College was a blast for me but man was I sore most of the time." Meredith said.

"See I wasn't that crazy, but I had only been with about four guys in undergrad until I had met Derek." Addison said. 

"And women?" Meredith asks softly.

"Well, I mean I guess I never really counted them because it was different. There were definitely about six girls I had been with. I was good."

"Ohh really? I gues I could say I'm a bit of a savant myself." Meredith says a bit seductively.

"What are you propositioning Grey?" Addison asks. 

"I mean we could put your skills to good use." Says Meredith while she places her hand on Addison's thigh. 

The pair are drunk at the moment but Meredith is much more drunk. Addison decides to go on with Meredith feeling how this is just going to be a drunk little experience. She's going to get see what Derek saw and feel it herself. 

Addison takes a last sip from her wine and stands up and takes Meredith to her bed. She then grabs the bottom of Meredith's shirt and pulls it over her head. She tosses it to the side and leans into Meredith causing her to sink back until her back is completely on the bed. She can see how lustful Meredith looks and she feels herself starting to get wet from just the looks of her. 

Addison moves on top of Meredith and unzips her pants and helps her shimmy out of it. Then Addison is on her knees over the gorgeous intern in her lacy purple bra and underwear. Meredith has done nothing to resist the sensational redhead and just lets herself live in the moment. All she wants is to see Addison naked.


	2. Seattle / Intern Year Pt. 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Addison takes the lead.

As Meredith is just in her intimate apparel she can't help and stare directly into Addison's eyes. Watching her seductively open her robe and slowly pulls out one of her shoulders. Meredith gets wetter by the second as Addison takes her sweet time to take off her robe. Addison then lets her robe fall a little to the the point where Meredith can see her bare shoulders and the top of her chest. Meredith knows best to just let the woman on top of her do what she knows to do. Then Addison decides her little show is over and let's her robe fall on Meredith's body. 

Addison is still on her knees over Meredith but she is fully bare letting the intern skim her body. Meredith feels so wet as she can see Addison in her natural beauty. Her wet hair, her nice round breasts, and her cleanly shaved sex. As she moves her hand to graze upon Addison's skin, the older woman instead grabs her wrist and moves it over the interns head. 

"Woah, calm down Grey. I'm not letting you experience me just so soon." Addison says seductively. 

She grabs Meredith's other wrist and moves it over her head. Now she has Meredith's hands over her and she can do whatever to her. She slowly bends down and kisses the interns jawline. Meredith lets a little moan escape as she feels Addisons lips finally touch her skin. Addison then moves her mouth and finally kisses Meredith. She starts slowly then opens her mouth a little more to let Meredith move in her tongue. They reach a hard makeout session, then Addison nibbles on Meredith's lower lip and moves away from the intern. 

Addison gets off the bed and walks to the top of the beds frame and pulls out a pink rope attached to the frame. She then grabs Meredith's wrists and ties them together over her blonde hair. Meredith feels her underwear turn into a puddle and just wants Addison to rip her to shreds. She can't stand this to go as slowly as Addison is taking it, but she knows that the orgasm Addison has in store for her is going to be worth it. 

At this point the exhilaration of getting together helps sober them up a bit. They're still a bit drunk but sober enough to know what they're getting into. Addison walks back to the bed and gets on top of Meredith. She bends down and kisses the back of Meredith's neck and then moves to bite her ear. 

"Do you want me to proceed, Grey?" Addison asks. 

"Mhm" Meredith moans out. 

At this point Addison takes small bites on Meredith's neck and moves her hand to the back of her neck. She leaves small unoticable marks and kisses all around. She moves up and starts kissing her lips. She can feel Meredith's tongue explore her mouth and enjoys the pleasure. She then unhooks Meredith's bra and throws it across the room. She then slowly starts to trail her kisses down to her breasts. She gives a little flick to both her nipples which causes them to harden and Meredith to moan. She starts to suck and lick one of her boobs and plays with the other one. Meredith is feeling all this pleasure and really wants to grab Addison's hair but she forgets shes tied up and end up pulling on the rope frequently. 

"I see you want to use your hand. But that would ruin the fun of seeing you want me the way you imagined." Addison says softly as she stares at the lusty interns eyes. 

Addison strokes her hands along Meredith's breast all the way down to her lower hip until she reaches the lace of her underwear. Addison moves all the way down the bed until she is face to face with Meredith's wet little panties. To make things more unbearable she decides to pull down Meredith's panties with her mouth and places her arms behind her so there is no skin to skin contacts. Meredith can't handle how Addison is tempting her and pulls on the rope harder which starts to leave a mark on her wrists. She moans as she feels Addison's breath at her core. 

Addison finally has Meredith's underwear on the floor and grabs her legs and places them on her shoulder. Addison moves on finger over Meredith's wetness and swirls it around to grab as much as her fingers can hold. 

She then holds her fingers up to show Meredith the way her fingers are sticking. She moves her index finger apart from the middle finger and just enjoys to see her wetness still connecting and starting to drip. She then places her fingers in her mouth and and gives a slight hum to send Meredith flying. 

She then lowers her head back and kisses Meredith's clit as she feels her move abruptly. Then she starts to use her tongue as a shovel to take on more of Meredith's juices. 

"Mmmm. You're sweet Grey. And to think this whole dessert is just for me." Addison says while she still licks Meredith's core. 

"Add..ison... mmmm, go faster. Pl..lease ."

Addisom decides that slow isn't enough and digs her mouth up to Meredith and starts to truly eat her out. She then places her middle finger all the way in and starts to wiggle it around. Meredith moans loudly as she feels Addison's fingers and tongue inside her. She starts to shake on the rope and starts to leave a slight little burn. Addison then sticks another finger inside Meredith and causes her to scream. Her other hand is playing with her clit and she know Meredith is about to dissolve. 

"Addison! I'm about to... mmmm... about..."

Right before Meredith was going to finish Addison pulls out her fingers and gets off Meredith's center. She licks her lips and sees the unsatisfaction in her face. She then slides up Meredith's body and starts to roughly kiss her. Meredith wants to finish so badly and she starts move her hips to feel some friction on her clit. 

"No, you're not going to finish just yet." Addison says as she moves her hands to unwrap Meredith from the rope. She sees the red marks and kisses her wrists. She then let's Meredith hold the back of her neck as they start to kiss harder. As they're kissing, Addison lowers her hand and grabs one of Meredith's legs and places it over her lower back to make Meredith's opening wider. Meredith feels the unevenness of her legs and tries to get her other leg on top of Addison but she doesn't let her. Addison then sticks 2 fingers inside of Meredith and causes her to moan loudly into her mouth. With her other hand, Addison grabs Meredith's neck and kisses her harder. She then rubs the interns clit with her thumb while pulsating her fingers in and out of her. 

Meredith is close to finishing and starts to buckle her hips and to add more pressure to Addison's fingers which would bring her closer. She starts to moan louder and longer and Addison can feel the buzz from her throat on her hand. Since Meredith got used to not using her hands she places her hands behind her head and grabs the rope as she starts to come. She let's out a scream for Addison and arches her back which makes Addison moan at the feeling of skin. Addison still pumps harder and faster at her core to get a full finish from Meredith. She moans softer now and the redhead still pumps but slower now. She gives Meredith a few seconds and then goes back to a faster pace. She then slowly slides in another finger which causes Meredith to buckle and cry out her name. Addison moves Meredith's leg down from her back and goes down again on the intern. 

At this point her core is a water show and she starts to suck and lick all around her core, lips, and slit. With her 3 fingers still moving and her mouth kissing her lower lips, Addison moves her other hand and starts rubbing circles on Meredith's clit. This causes Meredith to moan as hard as she can. Meredith starts to feel euphoric as she nears another finish and decides to sit up. She's watching the the hair of the beautiful redhead on her center and she can't believe this is actually happening. Then she lowers herself back, then she is supporting herself on her forearms and tilting her head all the way back. 

Addison can feel Meredith's walls to clench and she knows she's going to finish. So she swirls her fingers in a clockwise to counterclockwise motion while still pumping up and down. 

"Addison!" Meredith cries out as she finishes. 

Addison pulls out her fingers and starts to clean up her mess with her tongue leaving her spotless with remienace of her tongue licks. 

Addison moves up and grabs the small of Meredith's back and starts to kiss her softly. They make out and Meredith grabs on to Addison's hair and the side of her neck. 

"Now that was mind-blowing sex. And all you used was your fingers and tongue. You made me feel angry for not being able to touch you which made it even better when I came. And just the touch of your skin made me want to finish. Oh you are good." Meredith says. 

"See the trick was getting you to want me when you physically can't. It makes you want me more and I like that. And your sweetness was a delight." Addison added as she keeps kissing her. 

Meredith can taste herself through Addisons lips and enjoys it. Now she wants to show Addison what she can do herself but she waits because she wants to live in this moment.

Both women are now pretty sober and are just filled with lust over each other. There's no going back at this point. Meredith then grabs Addison's waist and flips them over. She kisses Addison's neck as she takes the lead. 

"Now it's your turn." Meredith whispers as she kisses the back of her neck and leaves a small mark.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for the comments on previous chapter! This will be a small little series of the times Addison and Meredith get together and how they enjoy their anatomy.


	3. Seattle / Intern Year Pt. 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Meredith takes charge.

Addison likes the way the intern flipped them. She can start to see that maybe she might have the skills she was boasting about earlier. She thinks about the way Meredith's body looks. Her thin toned abdomen, her soft breasts, her smooth curves. The look in Meredith's eyes makes her imagine the next couple of hours with intensity.

Meredith starts to kiss the redhead over her collarbone. Addison moves her hands over Meredith's back and strokes lightly in a upward motion. They appear to be taking this slowly and calmly which soothes Addison. She feels the comfort Meredith is giving her and just feels whole. Meredith starts to trail her kisses up her neck and back to her mouth. Meredith places one of her hands on Addison's cheek and the other on her shoulder. Since Meredith is on top of Addison, she has one of her hands on the back of Meredith's neck and the other on her upper back. They are making out passionately like they can't get enough of their kisses. 

Meredith then bites Addison's lower lip which causes her to bleed a little. Addison let's out a surprised moan and tastes her blood. She looks up at Meredith's eyes and sees that devilish look of satisfaction. Meredith lowers herself a little on Addison's body and plays with her nipples. She grabs a nipple and twists it, then she lowers herself to start sucking on her breast. Addison's breasts are bigger than hers and she enjoys the way they feel when she holds them in her hands. Meredith makes a figure eight trail with her tongue across Addison's breasts. 

Meredith goes lower on Addison's body admiring her soft skin and her beautiful hips. She kisses her stomach then moves over to the left and leaves a mark by her waist line. She goes down further and bites her lower hip and sucks on it to leave a big mark. 

Meredith spreads Addison's legs and makes her keep them open to allow Meredith to see her entire center. She then slowly slides down her fingers through her clit all the way to her opening. She pulls her fingers up and Addison's wetness starts to slowly drip down. She then smothers Addison's wetness on her breasts then sucks what remains. Addison bites her lip because she is enjoying Meredith's show. Meredith then comes back up to meet Addison face to face and kisses her more. 

Meredith leans back to make Addison come up to a sitting position as they kiss. Meredith rises up to her knees then places one of her legs across one of Addison's leg. She grabs Addison's other leg and moves it to where it's on her lower back. Then Meredith tilts slightly to the right which causes Addison let's out a moan. They rubbed each others clit when Meredith shifted her position. Meredith then starts to move her hips up and down to get more friction and they both start to moan. Meredith leans slightly forward so she could be slightly over Addison. Meredith moves at a moderate pace while kissing Addison. She leans in more to be directly in front of Addison's breats. She kisses one of them and plays with the other while moving her hips slightly faster. Meredith then pushes Addison back on her back. She puts herself over Addison and is keeping her balance with her knee between Addison's legs. 

Meredith is kissing Addison while her left leg is above Addison stationary right leg, and her knee between Addison's leg while carrying her left leg on her back. She moves her hips faster and Addison starts to moan loudly. Addison adds motion by moving in the contrary motion of Meredith's hips. They both start to unravel and their breaths start to get shorter and faster. 

"Meredith..." Addison slurs.

While they almost reach their finish, Meredith squeezes both of Addison's boobs to keep her balance well. She then starts to move her hips in a circle motion to feel Addison's center better which drives Addison insane as she starts to moan louder. 

Addison let's out a shriek of pleasure as she came while Meredith let out a load moan as she came with her. Meredith gets off Addison's center and pulls Addison up. They start to make out intensely. While they kiss Meredith inserts her index finger into Addison's core. Addison opens her mouth and moans into Meredith's mouth. Meredith strokes her clit with her thumb and gives Addison more pleasure. Before Addison can enjoy herself more Meredith pulls her fingers out and pauses their kisses. She climbs up the bed until she is directly behind Addison. The redhead might be taller then her but she figures out how to position herself to not make her height a problem. Meredith's back is against the beds frame and moves Addison's head to her shoulder. 

"I like this position because I can make you come as if I were fingering myself. I'll find your sweet spot better like this and make you yell for me." Meredith whispers to Addison's ear. 

She motions Addison to spread her legs and keep her knees up so she has a wider area. She moves her right hand over Addison's slit and rubs circles to get her feeling sensational. Addison moans then looks over to Meredith and they start to kiss. Meredith then slides 2 fingers into her opening and pumps them in and out. She moves her left hand under Addison's left upper thigh and starts to enter her fingertips into her core. Addison moans louder as she feels Meredith's fingers and fingertips. Meredith slides another finger and moves her thumb over her clit to add more pleasure. 

Addison enjoys the extra addition and moans louder. Addison moves her right hand above her head and grabs the bed frame while her left hand holds on to the covers for dear life. She almost reaches her climax and arches her back which causes Meredith's fingers to go in deeper. 

"MEREDITH... Ohhhh, I'm... going... to... MER..."  
Addison screamed as she reached her climax before she could finish screaming Meredith's full name. 

Meredith pulls out her right hand and slides it into Addison's mouth to suck.

"I want you to taste what you taste like before I taste you down there myself." 

"Mmmmm" 

Then both of the women move into different positions and continue to experience themselves. They last hours into the night.


	4. Seattle / Intern Year Pt. 4

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Addison and Meredith move on.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay so this chapter was based slightly like a scene in the move Carol (starring Cate Blanchett and Rooney Mara). I felt like they could recreate the scene but with their own dynamic.

Meredith slowly opens her eyes and sees Addison standing by the window overlooking Seattle. She's wearing her towel robe and her hair is wet again. She brings her cup of coffee up to her mouth and takes a sip. Her robe is open because she can see her bare long leg over one of her suitcases. What a sight to wake up to. Meredith waits a few moments before she technically wakes up.

Addison turns as she catches Meredith move with the corner of her eye. She brings her leg down and grabs the side of her robe to cover herself. She then places her coffee on the table next to a plate of eggs, bacon, bread, and jam. She walks over to the bed and sits on the edge looking at Meredith.

"Meredith, what happened last night was just a one time thing. I enjoyed what we had, but I just can't let this happen again. I don't think of you in that way but when you brought the alcohol and opened up to me. We just followed what the alcohol percieved us to do."

"Addison it's okay. I never really thought of you like that until last night. I came here to apologize to you not take you to bed. I'm sorry and this won't happen again."

"You have nothing to be sorry about. I'm the one who should be sorry for allowing this happen. But let's just keep this to ourselves and work together as if nothing happened."

"Well at least what happened was incredible and not a regrettable choice. I enjoyed you Addison."

"Thanks Grey. Before you go, I ordered us some breakfast from room service, in case you might be hungry."

"Thank you." Meredith said as she smiles at Addison. She then looks at the floor to see if her clothes are there but then notices it's in a nice folded pile at the edge of the bed. She gets off the bed with the covers over her body and goes into the restroom with her clothes. 

'What just happened? I had sex with Addison Montgomery? But it felt so good. Her tongue in me, her lips on mine, her smooth skin over mine. No, Meredith calm yourself. It was a one time thing. Stupid tequila.' Meredith thinks to herself while she changes in the restroom. 

Meredith walks out fully clothed and places the cover on Addison's bed. She notices Addison had changed into a elegant black dress while she's putting on one of her earrings in front of the vanity. She checks the alarm clock to see the time and it's only 8:49am. She has to enter the hospital at 11am. She goes over to the table and pours herself some coffee and starts to eat her plate. 

Addison is applying her red lipstick and Meredith just thinks of how those lips were inside her. The silence in the room is not awkward but more of a "we had sex but we aren't going to talk about it right now so we're just going to coexist" type of silence. After Meredith finishes her plate she gets up and grabs her keys, phone, wallet, and pager. 

"Hey thanks again for the breakfast. I'll see you at work." Says Meredith as she walks toward the door.

"No problem." Says Addison as she combs through her hair before she starts to blow dry it.

Meredith leaves and Addison just sits there staring at her bed through the vanity. She just imagines all the ways she had sex with Meredith last night. How they stayed up into late hours of the night just feeling each other. The more she thinks about it the more she realizes that they were completely sober for most of the time. She doesn't allow herself to think more about the intern and decides to focus on her case later in the day. 

****************

When Addison and Meredith pass each other in the hospital they tend to not look at each other and pretend nothing happened. Meredith never tells Cristina about her and Addison. They end up avoiding each other for about a week until Meredith starts to get back with Derek. 

Addison soon forgets about the night with the hot intern as she sees Meredith get back with Derek. She continues to work with her like nothing ever happened which she appreciates because she honestly thought Meredith would have made it a bigger deal then it was. Anyways Addison has her own problems to deal with.

Both women live their lives as if nothing ever happened until...


	5. Seattle to L.A. / End of Intern Year

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Meredith catches Addison before she moves away.

It's been about two days since Cristina's failed wedding. Preston Burke left completely with no idea if he is ever coming back. Meredith has been staying Cristina during this time to help her cope with this. This is the end of their intern year. Cristina didn't want to end her honeymoon to Hawaii so instead she convinced Meredith to go with her. They fly out the next day in the afternoon. Alex told Meredith that Addison plans to move to Los Angeles now. Meredith doesn't know if this bothers her more than it should because of that night. 

Meredith drives back to her house to pack a suitcase of her clothes for her trip with Cristina. While she packs she realizes she wants to see Addison before she moves and before she goes to Hawaii. She finishes packing quickly and runs out of her room. Alex didn't tell her what day she was leaving, but Meredith has the urgency to go see her now before she leaves. She runs out the door and throws her suitcase into her backseat. She turns on the car and drives towards The Archfield. 

She impatiently waits in the elevator wanting it to go faster. Meredith feels her world clashing down. She broke up with Derek at Cristina's wedding, their intern year is technically over, she almost died, Burke ran away, and now Addison is doing the same. She can't handle her world constantly changing around her. As soon as the elevator doors open she runs towards the first room on her left. 

*Knocks multiple times*

"Addison? It's me, Meredith. Please open the door."

Addison opens the door surprised to see the intern at her room again. Before she can fully let Meredith in, she already barges into the room. She then circles around the room and stands by the bed and vanity. 

"You're leaving? Why? Why are you running away?"

"Meredith I am not running away. Frankly I'm going to better myself in a place where I can have a fresh start. I'll be working with friends and be able to focus on myself." Addison says seriously while she closes the door and walks towards Meredith. 

"Everyone is leaving and everyone is dying!" Meredith says as she starts breathing faster and her eyes get watery. 

Addison walks over to the intern and hugs her. She places her directly above the interns and strokes her hair. Meredith starts to break down and cries into Addison's chest. 

"Shhhh, Meredith it's going to be okay. I'm going away for the better and you are about to be a second year resident. Your life has barely begun. I know it feels like the world has come crashing down, believe me. But it's for the better for everyone. So enjoy your vacation time, relax, unwind, and focus on yourself. I was never an important person in your life."

"I'm sorry for everything that's happened. I just couldn't think about every thing not being the same anymore." Meredith says as she stops sobbing and calms down. 

The two women stay hugging for a couple more moments until Meredith backs away and cleans her tears. 

"When are you leaving?"

"In two days. I've finished packing up my clothes and shipped a few boxes already. All I need to do is go to the hospital tomorrow and finish some paperwork then leave the following morning." Addison says as she sits on the bed. 

"What made you choose L.A.? Was it the beach or the guys?" Says Meredith while she sits next to Addison on the bed. 

"I guess I could say it was a little bit of both, but in reality my best friend from med school owns a practice there with her ex-husband who is also my friend from med school. But the environment was relaxing and I get to work with my long time friends by the beach. I guess I could say that's a win. I didn't want to go back to New York because everything there is not the same and I wanted something new. L.A. is where I can get a fresh start and change my life for the better."

"That's good for you Addison. I'm glad you're following your gut." Says Meredith.

Both women sit on the bed in silence. Neither one know what to do next. Meredith doesn't know whether she should leave or just stay and talk. They don't have much to say to each other. Meredith stands up and turns towards the door but then turns and leans into Addison and kisses her. Addison didn't expect Meredith to kiss her, she thought she was leaving. Instead of stopping the intern she let's her continue to kiss her. 

Meredith is kissing Addison while she's standing and Addison is still sitting on the bed. When Meredith pulls away she looks at Addison to see if she is going to pull the next move. Addison instead stands up, walks over to the door and places the do not disturb sign on the handle. She then locks the door and walks back to Meredith. She holds her face in her hands and they continue to make out. 

Addison kicks off her high black heels to lower herself to Meredith. Meredith moves her hands up Addison's back until she finds the zipper of her red short sleeve dress. She pulls the zipper down and unhooks her bra strap with her other arm. Addison walks them back to the bed and leans into Meredith so she can fall into the bed. They kiss more and then Addison pulls herself up. Meredith sees her bare shoulders as her dress is about to slide off her body. 

"Are you sure you want to do this again Grey? I mean what about Derek? And this will also be the last time, are you sure you want to do this?" Addison asks.

"I don't want to talk about Derek or anything else. All I want is you." Meredith tells Addison. She realizes Addison doesn't know about the break up so she just doesn't tell her. 

Addison slips out of her dress and let's her bra fall too. They end up kissing and Meredith signals Addison to take off her shirt. Addison pulls off Meredith's shirt and drops it in the pile of her clothes. Meredith unhooks her own bra and throws it across the room because she is desperate for Addison right now. She remembers she told Cristina she would be back soon, but she doesn't want to hurry this with Addison. 

'I mean, Addison is going to be gone by the time I leave for Hawaii. It's best that we do this now before I leave tomorrow or meet Cristina. I'll call her in a bit to tell her I got caught up in something.' Meredith thinks while she kisses Addison.

They continue to make out and...


	6. Seattle to L.A. / End of Intern Year Pt. 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which the clock ticks.

Meredith arrived at Addison's hotel room at 4:27pm. 

*4:49pm*  
Addison is kissing Meredith's neck while her hand is inside her dark jeans. Addison couldn't wait until Meredith took of her pants and just slid her hand inside. Meredith is leaning back while not touching the bed with her back. Addison is maintaining Meredith's balance with her free hand by holding her upper back. Meredith comes close to her climax and tilts her head as far as she can. She moans louder and longer as Addison's fingers slip in and out of her. Addison loves seeing Meredith enjoy herself and she bites Meredith right underneath her jaw where she can leave a mark with no true visibility to anyone.

*5:32pm*  
Addison is facing the wall while holding onto the beds frame while she's on her knees with her legs spread apart so Meredith can enjoy her center. Meredith is laying directly underneath Addison's smooth core. She has one of her hands rubbing and sliding into Addison's center while the other is grabbing onto Addison's outer thigh. Addison feels so desirable when she has sex with Meredith which helps makes her finishes exhilarating and sensational. As she comes near her climax, she starts to move her hips in a upward motion to receive more friction toward her clit. 

*7:19pm*  
"Addison, do you really have to go?"

Addison places her hand on Meredith's cheek in a sense of comfort while they're laying side by side on her bed. 

"Yes, I have to go. I'll still come to Seattle from time to time for cases when they need the best. But you're going to be fine." Addison says calmly to soothe Meredith after their multiple rounds of sex. 

Meredith moves closer to Addison and positions herself to be the little spoon while Addison holds her and they doze of together. 

*8:27pm*  
13 MISSED CALLS FROM CRISTINA 

10 VOICEMAILS 

'Oh shit, I forgot to tell Cristina a story.' Thinks Meredith as she wakes up from her nap and checks her phone. She realizes she silenced it to make sure her time with Addison was unbothered. She looks over her shoulder to see Addison still sleeping. Meredith slowly gets up from the bed and walks over to her pile of clothes on the floor and picks it up. She folds Addison's dress and intimate wear and places it at the edge of the bed. 

Meredith doesn't want to make noise because she doesn't want Addison to wake up. She doesn't know what to say or how to walk away if she were to wake up. She pulls up her pants and underwear then realizes she threw her bra across the room. She walks over by the door to see her bra on the floor. She attaches her bra then pulls her shirt over her head and silently tries to grab her keys from the table near Addison's side of the bed. She manages not to make any noise, unlocks the door, and pulls it open dramatically slow. She only opens it enough to slide her body out so no light hits Addison's face causing her to wake up. 

*9:03pm*  
Addison wakes up and sees Meredith left. She doesn't know why she feels extremely upset over a woman who she's had sex with twice. They never had a close relationship and always were professional at work. She feels empty as Meredith left without saying goodbye to her. Addison gets out of bed and walks towards the table in the left corner and checks her phone to see if Meredith had left any voicemails or calls. Nothing shows up and Addison just feels forgotten. The redhead strides into her bathroom and steps into the shower. She turns on the showerhead and just lets the water hit her face and run down her naked body. She has the temperature slightly warm but cold enough to wake her up completely from that post nap haze. While standing under the shower perfectly still, Addison can only imagine Meredith's smile as she got to be the top for their couple of hours together. 

Meredith is sitting on Cristina's living room couch in Burke's old apartment. Cristina is on the phone with a Chinese takeout restaurant ordering them dinner. Meredith lied to Cristina by telling her that she had slept with Derek because Cristina figured she was busy having sex, hence the 13 missed calls and 10 voicemails. She opened one voicemail and it started with 'I swear if you're sleeping with Derek again then you're defeating the purpose of breaking up with him.' Meredith couldn't tell Cristina that she had passionate sex with Derek's ex-wife. Not only did she not want to admit she enjoyed their sex she can't accept she might have feelings for the world-class neonatal surgeon. Meredith would rather shove those feelings deep inside her and pretend it has something to do with Derek. Besides it's the perfect time to actually feel depressed over her departure because she just broke up with Derek and is going away with Cristina to leave their problems behind. 

Meredith can't stop replaying their hours of intimacy in her head. She can't stop seeing Addison scream in pleasure. She can't stop picturing Addison arching her back as she came due to her tongue and fingers. She can't stop imagining Addison's eyes as they stared at each other with intensity while they scissored. And she can't stop melting at the fact that Addison called out for her while she climaxed. Just seeing Addison Montgomery unravel herself by her touch and attention made Meredith hot all over again. She couldn't face Addison before she left so she ran away instead. She feels empty knowing she's moving away far from her sight. Yet Meredith doesn't want to admit her feelings for Addisom which creates a problem to let her go from her mind. She wants to cancel her trip and run away to L.A. but what would that make her. 

"Mer... Merrrr... MEREDITH!" 

"W-what?"

"Do you want spring rolls?"

"Yes." 

As Cristina continues to order, Meredith stands up and walks over to the window that overlooks part of Seattle. She stares out to the buildings and just thinks about Addison's touch. She can faintly smell Addison's scent on her clothing. Meredith feels she made the wrong decision about Addison. She should have said goodbye.


	7. L.A. / Hawaii

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Addison and Meredith think of each other.

Addison is living in a hotel for the moment in Los Angeles. She had talked with Naomi Bennett about starting work in about a week. Naomi set Addison up with a great realtor to help her search for a home while she enjoys the blessing of not having to worry for any patients or people. She has visited Naomi very often when she first arrived. She is suspicious of the fact that Sam Bennett hadn't reached out to her yet. All Addison knows is that she's going to bask in her free time, explore Los Angeles, and relax. 

**********

Meredith is enjoying the newlyweds suite with Cristina at a fabulous resort in Hawaii. They have been drinking nonstop for the past days and just accepted their lives are messed up and only alcohol can fix the damage for the time being. They've trashed the hotel room, swam during multiple hours of the day, and intensely flirt with the cute men around the pool area. Meredith has already slept with a few guys and intends on sleeping with more in the remaining time they have. 

***********

Addison has spent the day walking around the beautiful beaches of Los Angeles. She just looked at her first prospective home which was an apartment in the city. Addison wanted more of a beach house rather than another apartment. She wants to start a new leaf which means radical changes have to happen. 

It has gotten really late and she decided to take a swim at her hotels swimming pool. While underwater, Addison remembers the feeling of being submerged by water when she was in Seattle taking a shower after Meredith had left without saying goodbye. Addison comes up for air and looks around to see if anyone is in the area. The pool is vacant and it's just Addison alone with her thoughts. 

Addison can't help but feel she left of piece of herself back in Seattle. She doesn't want to believe she does have feelings for Meredith Grey, but she can't escape her mind. Addison sits on an underwater ledge and rests her back against the wall. She looks up to the sky then closes her eyes. She can see the way Meredith was deep inside her with her tongue. She can remember the way Meredith kissed her neck. She thinks about the hours they spent the first night and then the hours they spent the second night. She can't shake the feeling that the connection they shared was thrilling and strong. But Addison is in L.A. and Meredith is in Seattle, so nothing was meant to happen. Hooking up with Meredith was more of a slip rather than an intentional move. Thinking that she has feelings for Meredith can be dangerous since her Ex-husband is her boyfriend. Yet Addison misses Meredith's touch and wants to do anything to have another moment with her. 

************

It's the middle of the night and Meredith is on top of a random guy she found roaming the pool. She is riding his dick while holding on to his toned abdomen for support. The guy is holding on to her ass and slaps it every once in a while as they fuck. Meredith hasn't been able to finish with this guy and she feels dissatisfied since he couldn't do his job correctly. The guy starts to moan and moves his hands up to Meredith's hips to help her move up and down faster. Meredith knows he's about to finish and she goes faster to help him. She thinks that this is one of her most boring sexual experiences. 

"Ohhh yeahhh, baby!" Sighs out the random guy. 

Meredith falls over to the side of the bed and she still hasn't finished yet, so she waits for the guy to fall asleep. The random guy starts to snore and that's her queue to finger herself. She closes her eyes and thinks about Addison's fingers touching her instead of her own. She remembers her touch and the way her long fingers would swirl around inside her. Just thinking about the times they've had sex sets Meredith to finish quickly. Meredith does her best to keep in her climactic moan but can only hold it off for a few seconds until she moans out loud. She covers her mouth with her free hand and checks to see if she woke up the guy. She sighs in relief and gets off the bed and puts on her bikini. 

Instead of immediately leaving the guy's room she walks over to his balcony and leans onto the rail. She loves the way the moon is full tonight and how it reflects on the Hawaiian ocean. She would much rather be sharing this view with Addison than anyone else. She wants to dial Addison's phone number and ask how L.A. is working for her but they have no reason to maintain contact. 

Meredith still has feelings for Derek and she feels he's her true love but can't understand if she may have also have fallen in love with Addison. She thinks it is possible to love two people at once but thinks no one would understand. Meredith wonders if Addison would ever feel the same way and disregards that thought before truly accepting it. She walks away from the balcony and then walks out the door. 

As Meredith walks down the hallway she turns and opens one of the ice machine rooms and goes inside. She bends down against the wall and holds her head down thinking about all the mistakes she's made in the past year. She should have told Addison Montgomery how she felt about her.


	8. Return to Seattle / Second Year Residency

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Meredith catches Addison before her flight.

Meredith sits at the bartending table and just thinks about how Addison just told her off because she's letting Derek escape. She chuckles a little but can't contain her happiness that Addison got her attention just to tell her that. It's been over a month since she last saw Addison and she barely walked out a few seconds ago. Meredith loves Derek but her bottled feelings for Addison is blinding her heart. She downs her drink, grabs her coat, and runs towards the door.

As she runs up the stairs she sees Addison on the phone calling for a taxi. She runs towards her and takes the phone out of her hands and hangs up the call. 

"Hey! I was calling for a taxi!"

"Not anymore. I'm going to take you instead."

"Meredith, you were barely drinking back there. Besides I need to get my things from The Archfield and get to the airport."

"I only had that one drink so I'm completely sober. Is your flight actually tonight?"

"Yes. The flight is in about three and half hours. I also need to check out of the hotel in about thirty minutes from now."

"Well let's go!" Says Meredith as she signals Addison to follow her to her car. 

While Meredith pulls up to the street, she asks Addison about her new experience in Los Angeles. They end up talking about the slowdown of her patient output and how everything is more relaxed there. Addison mentions the practice has a cooperative approach to help patients with a collaborative strategy. 

They reach The Archfield and Addison steps out of the car. Addison sticks her head in the window and says, "I'll just get my luggage and check out. I'll be out quickly." Meredith sits back and raises the volume of the radio. Soon she sees Addison walking out with her luggage rack. Meredith gets out the car to help Addison store her baggage in her trunk. Meredith closes the trunk while Addison gets in the car. And they're on the road again. 

To get to the airport, they need to get onto the ferryboat to cross the water. The car ride there is silent as both women just listen to the radio. Addison feels tongue-tied because she doesn't know what to say to Meredith. As they drive into the ferryboat, Meredith can't stop thinking about Derek. Meredith parks the car and both women stay inside and continue listening to the radio. The car is filled with an awkward silence. Addison can only think about how Meredith left her without saying goodbye and Meredith can only think about how Addison hasn't said a word to her about their last encounter. To relieve the tension, Meredith gets out the car and walks towards the side of the ferry. 

Meredith is leaning against the rail of the boat overlooking Seattle with its lit buildings and the water reflecting the bright lights. Addison slowly approaches Meredith from behind and leans beside Meredith and enjoys the view as well. While looking at the city, Addison says, "I've missed Seattle. I've missed the ferries. And I've missed the hospital. But I'm glad I left when I did. It truly was for the better." 

Meredith turns and stares at Addison with a hurt look on her face. While they were talking in the car, Addison mentioned some new relationships that she was interested in. That made Meredith feel like Addison has completely moved on. 

"You ran away from your problems." Says Meredith with a voice in pain. 

Addison turns to face Meredith with a pissed off face and says, "I walked away to a better opportunity for myself and my sanity. There's basically nothing left for me here in Seattle."

"What about me?" Reclaims Meredith. 

Addison looks shocked at the fact that Meredith said that. "I-I don't know what you want me to say Meredith. Frankly I just found out today that you and Derek broke up at Burke's wedding. When you came to see me I thought I was your accomplice in helping you cheat on Derek. But you failed to mention you two had broken up. I felt like an adulterous whore when I left. The same way I've felt since I lived here. Meredith, I don't need that following me around. Especially since my image is tainted here with you and my ex-husband. I would have never felt at peace here with you two running around in love. Don't get me wrong, I enjoyed our time together, but we were never going to work out Meredith. You would have ultimately gone back to Derek and I would have once again been the cheater." 

Meredith pulls Addison in to kiss her. Addison is shocked because she wasn't expecting Meredith to kiss her, she was expecting her to get angrier and question her more. Addison lets her guard down and pulls in Meredith as close as she can. They continue to kiss until the ferryboat announcer states that they are nearing the end. Meredith takes Addison by the hand as they walk back to the car. 

When the ferry connects to the street, Meredith drives towards the airport. Before they enter, Meredith turns into a nearby hotel and drives into the parking garage. She takes them all the way to the lowest level. The lot is empty with only 3 cars parked around. Meredith goes into the back and parks the car next to a corner with no visible cars nearby. The car faces the wall and seems good enough to hide them from anyone. 

"Meredith where are we?"

As Meredith unbuckles her seat belt, she says "Don't worry about that. Just enjoy me before you go back. We have a little over an hour before you have to be inside that airport and make it in time for your flight." 

Meredith reaches over to Addison's seat and pushes the handle that moves her seat all the way back. Then she pulls the lever that lowers the upper portion of the seat to make it come down almost like a bed. Addison just let's the beautiful blonde move her because she can't wait to have her again. She missed the taste of her lips and the feeling of her skin. 

Meredith slides over the center of the car and ends up on top of Addison. She leans down and starts to kiss Addison. As they kiss, Addison pulls off Meredith's shirt to expose her skinny curves. Meredith pulls out Addison's tucked in shirt and unbuttons it. Addison has on a front lock bra and it helps Meredith to expose her perfectly round pink breasts. Meredith lowers herself into the foot space of the seat and kisses Addison's abdomen and breasts. Addison moans as Meredith's cool tongue touches her warm body. Meredith reaches the side of Addison's skirt and unzips it as she pulls it down. She pulls down Addison's lacy black thong and hangs it on her rearview mirror as decor. Addison pulls her legs up to the dashboard and bends her knees to give Meredith the most space she can have in this confined car. Meredith kisses her bottom lips, taking in the sweet juice of Addison Montgomery's center. By the feeling of Meredith's tongue, Addison moans loudly. 

Meredith is pumping two fingers in and out of Addison's opening while sucking and rolling her tongue over Addison's clit. Addison can't stand the feeling of Meredith eating her out again and she starts to consistently moan and bites her finger to keep herself from screaming. Meredith starts to swirl her fingers in a figure eight motion while increasing the speed of her pumps. This brings Addison to the point of ecstasy as she yells for Meredith. Ultimately Addison drips out onto Meredith's mouth and fingers. Meredith licks her clean and finishes her part by kissing her bottom lips in a soft delicate manner. She brings herself up to Addison and kisses her with tongue so Addison can taste herself. Addison moans at the taste of herself through Meredith's mouth and tongue. Addison sees the clock on the radio and realizes they just spent more than a half hour focused on her and the have another half hour left.

Addison unzips Meredith's pants and slides her hand to meet Meredith's wet core. Meredith is very wet and Addison smiles into Meredith's mouth as she feels her fingers soaked already. Meredith's wetness makes it easy for Addison to slide in her middle and ring finger inside her. Meredith shudders when she feels Addison's long fingers inside her and she starts to thrust into Addison fingers. Meredith is moving herself with Addison to help her fingers hit her sweet spot and Addison manages to lower herself slightly enough that Meredith screams her name. Addison found Meredith's g-spot with her fingers. Meredith is holding Addison's face as they kiss intensely and Meredith moans deeply into Addison's mouth when each stroke constantly hits her spot. Addison can feel Meredith's walls come together and feels a gush of fluids run down her fingers. Meredith stops moving as much but Addison continues to pump inside her and starts to circle her thumb around her clit. Meredith still in pleasure from her big finish suddenly feels another orgasm come her way. Addison uses all her force to push her hand deeper into Meredith's center. Meredith starts to see stars as she nears her second finish within seconds and starts to move on Addison's fingers again. Meredith let's go of Addison's lips and tilts her head back to scream for Addison while maintaining her hands on Addison's face. Addison slightly tilts her head so Meredith can slide her fingers into her mouth. The feeling of the second extensive orgasm and the texture of Addison's tongue sucking her fingers makes Meredith scream as loud as she can forgetting they're in a parking garage. 

Addison slides her fingers out and licks them to taste Meredith's big finish. She then pulls Meredith in for another makeout session before they leave. Meredith moves back over to her seat and pulls on her shirt while Addison pulls up her skirt, tucks in her shirt, and buttons it up. Addison fixes her seat and strokes her hair back into place. 

"Keep the panties as a token of gratitude for that magical tongue of yours."

As Meredith pulls out of the garage she replies with, "I intended to keep it. It will remind me of your fingers reaching my spot and the double continuous orgasm you gave me. Which in fact caused me to have leaked into my favorite pair of jeans."

Both women giggle and smile about the best car sex they could have in about an hour. As Meredith pulls up to Addison's terminal, the feelings of despair and desire hit her as she faces reality. She helps Addison with her luggage and places it in the rack. Addison looks at the beautiful Meredith Grey who made her feel exceptional. Addison pushes Meredith back into the side of her car and kisses her fiercely with no shame if anyone sees them. Meredith holds onto Addison's gorgeous red locks. Addison goes down to her neck and leaves her a stunning new noticeable hickey. Addison leans back and whispers to Meredith, "I'm going to miss you Grey." She turns around, pulls her rack, and walks into the terminal without looking back. Meredith feels happy that Addison just told her she's going to miss her. Although she feels sad that the redhead is going back she can't help but feel happy that they had passionate sex again. She now knows that she definitely loves Addison.


	9. Emergency Visit / Second Year Residency

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Addison holds Meredith.

Meredith is having a successful relationship with Derek. It's been a couple of months since she last saw Addison and accepted the way things were left. Meredith felt some closure which helped her shove her feelings back down. She's in a loving relationship with Derek and they even seem ready to take the next step. The only problem for Meredith is that Addison is back in town but for her brother. 

Addison keeps circling Archer Montgomery's room in hope that Derek can save him. She looks around and just feels herself under too much stress to handle. She wants to scream and cry because she doesn't want to lose her brother but at the same time she wants comfort and peace with anyone. She feels lonely as she's still single, but feels better than before because Sam, Naomi, Derek, and Mark are all back together again. She remembers their glory days. Addison hasn't had time to look for Meredith nor has she been a prominent thought in her mind. 

Meredith is walking down the I.C.U. unit and notices Addison by her brothers room. She immediately swerves to the left and tries not to catch Addison's attention. She has been avoiding Addison so she doesn't do something stupid that can affect her relationship to Derek. Either way, she remembers that she has to go into Archer's room to check on his vitals and stats anyway.

Addison sees Meredith quietly enter the room but doesn't acknowledge her presence. Her friends are talking about her wedding with Derek and the fact that he wrote a song just for her. They start to sing and point out the good years of her marriage while no one knows that the blondie in the room is the slutty intern. As they start to wonder who the mystery woman is Addisom tries to be subtle and point with her head that Meredith is the woman in question. This creates a bit of an awkward situation for Meredith and Addison but creates quite a commotion for her friends. 

Derek then shares the news that since Archer has worms in various areas of his brain, the surgery would be ineffective. Addison can't handle the news and tries to get Derek to be the neuro god he always thinks of himself. She asks him to look further and get those things out of Archer's head. 

Meredith is sitting at the nurses station just staring at Addison almost break down. She hasn't been able to look at Addison closely without bringing attention to herself so this is her perfect chance to admire her. Addison has chopped off her long red locks up to her upper neck length. Honestly Addison can pull of the short hair and it makes Meredith wonder about all the bites she could give Addison and have her find another way to hide them without her hair. As Addison paces down the hall. Meredith just enjoys her outfit making Addison look like a sexy professional rather than a scared sister. Her matching dark plaid blazer and pencil skirt bring out the color of her eyes and hair. Her black top and necklace of pearls gives Addison the elegant charm in her outfit. And of course she is wearing black pointy heels which are apart of Addison's signature style. 

Addison looks up and catches the resident staring at her. She raises one eyebrow to signify she's confused of her glare. Meredith stands up walks to the corner of the back hallway and moves her head in the direction of the hall which means she wants Addison to follow her. Meredith walks all the way down the hallway beyond the sliding door and takes a left where there's rooms of empty exam rooms. As Addison turns the corner of the exam room hallway she sees Meredith at the end of the hall going into exam room 9. See usually rooms 1-4 get used all the time, but when there's a big trauma or accident rooms 5-9 get used. They're in luck because it's a pretty still day and no one is using any exam rooms at the moment. 

Addison opens the door and slowly walks in to see Meredith sitting on the short doctors chair near the patient exam table. She closes and locks the door just in case anyone does try to come in here. Addison stares at the blonde woman expecting her to say something since she did lure her away from her brother. 

"So, why'd you lure me here Grey?"

Nothing but silence from Meredith who isn't even looking at Addison. 

"So you're just going to ignore me? Look I have to go back and watch my brother. This seems not to be important." Says Addison as she walks back to the door and reaches for the handle. 

Before Addison can grab the handle she feels Meredith press behind her and wrap her arms around waist. Addison moves her hands to hold onto Meredith's embrace. She gently pushes Meredith off as she turns around to face her. 

"Don't go yet." Says Meredith.

"I won't." 

Meredith then comes forward to continue to hug Addison. Meredith cozies up to Addison as her head is resting underneath her neck and chest. She can feel Addison's heartbeat racing and she can't stop to think if she's the reason or her sick dying brother. Addison just stands there with Meredith as she holds her back with one hand and strokes the blonde locks of the resident. Addison may have her heart racing on the fact that her brother may die or that she's in Meredith personal space once more, but at least she feels more relaxed. 

"I really want to kiss you like you have no idea. But I'm with Derek now and we're happy. He's happy. I'm happy. I think we're all happy. I don't want to hurt him but I can't stop thinking about you. I don't want to damage him anymore." 

"It's okay. We can just hug and take in our warmth together. [...] I can't stop thinking about you too." Addison says smoothly to calm Meredith down a bit. 

Both women are embraced in each others arms slightly swaying around to ease each others pain and stress. Addison only thinks about holding Meredith and keeping her safe. Meredith only thinks about not wanting to let go of Addison once more. They may have not had sex but she feels she's not strong enough to let her go again. Her love for Derek is everything at the moment, but Addison keeps coming back causing her to retract back to her love for Addison. 

Meredith's pager buzzes and she moves away from her connection with Addison. She checks to see who it is and It's Derek. Addison sees the name too and insists to Meredith that she's going with her. They walk out of the exam room and make their way to find Derek. Addison honestly expected Meredith to question her or even fuck her in the room. What makes her feel excited about Meredith, is that she wanted comfort and love and she was able to give that to her while in pain herself. They both happened to calm each other down and bask in their inclusive comforting ways. 

Derek was able to complete the surgery and save Archer. Addison ended up consulting on a case with Derek, Meredith, and Alex over a pregnant patient with a brain tumor. They ended up losing the patient which sent Derek in a rage Addison rarely ever saw. 

Addison walks across the crowd of people blocking the overlooking bridge by the chief's office and notices Derek and Mark beating each other up. The fight gets ended as people intervene and Addison's instinct is to go help Derek with his pain and loss over his patient. Before she goes, Alex pulls her away and brings her back to reality. She can't help but feel miserable seeing the woman she has feelings for tend to her true love. Addison knows she has feelings for the Grey girl, but she hasn't accepted the fact that she loves her. She watches Meredith go and feels left behind.


	10. Seattle Consult / Third Year Residency

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Addison catches a glimpse of Meredith

It's been well over a year since Addison last saw Meredith. From the last time Addison was there she knew Derek was planning to propose to Meredith. Derek then feel into a dark phase where he almost ruined the woman she wanted. Not soon after they got married... on a post-it note. 

Mark called her mid-breakfast to ask her for a consult on his pregnant teenage daughter. Her urged her to get there immediately so Addison grabbed her purse and went straight to the airport to catch the next flight to Seattle. 

On the plane, Addison could only think about Meredith. People can change in a year and Meredith was married as well. She couldn't hope for more than a simple hug or greeting from her, but all she thought about was the nights they shared in the hotel and the car ride to the airport. 

Mark was waiting for her on the other side of the elevator as she walked into the familiar lobby. They walked to the nursing station as she saw her old friends that she suddenly missed. She saw Derek but no Meredith in sight. No one knew she was coming today so maybe Meredith hadn't heard she's here. Addison couldn't take the time to stop and look for her because she told herself that she was going to be here in and out. 

Before Addison walked into the O.R., she saw Meredith down the hall in her scrubs and a cap walking into another O.R. Meredith hadn't noticed or known Addison was in the vicinity, if she did she would have sought her out. 

Addison felt flustered that Mark questioned her surgical skills since he didn't let her perform the operation as she planned. She did feel happy that Mark had matured and taken on being an actual father. She felt more shaken up by the fact that she wasn't able to see Meredith up close or even get to talk to her. Since Addison was done here, she changed out of her scrubs and took off without looking back. 

Meredith had been out of her surgery and was hanging around the nurses station in the lobby. She overheard Callie asking Mark if Addison had already left. She felt a splurge of dismissed feelings rise as she heard that she already left. What shook her core was that Addison was here. She was feet away from her. Moments away from the woman she loved. She couldn't believe that. It had been more than a year since their last interaction. They hadn't kept touch and knowing the redhead was near her made Meredith want to scream. She wanted to see how Addison looked, felt, and know if she was in a good place. 

Meredith tried to call her right after she left the lobby but there was no response and she kept going to voicemail. She realized that Addison must have been on a plane when she called so she decided to leave a short simple message. 

"Addison, I missed you. I didn't know you were here. Why... did you leave so fast?" 

Meredith abruptly ended the call before she actually told Addison she loved her and wanted her to come back. She brought herself to reality. She's married to Derek and she didn't even get see Addison so there's no reason to feel any guilt. She hasn't cheated. 

Addison is laying in her bed staring at her white ceiling. After she got off the plane she saw one voicemail from Meredith. She wasn't ready to open it then. Now she feels so alone. She caught a glimpse of that gorgeous girl and that was enough to make her feel miserable again. She grabbed her phone and heard the voicemail. 

'I missed you' kept circling Addison's head through the night. She kept thinking Meredith meant it literally but also figuratively. But just hearing 'I missed you' sent her back to the first night they shared. She wants to respond and call her but it's best if she leaves her be. Meredith is married and she's not an adulterous whore.


	11. Seattle Emergency / Fourth Year Residency

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Meredith reads a note.

"Oh I'm missed you." Says Meredith as she moaned to the feeling of Addison's fingers. 

"I've missed you too Grey." Says Addison as she has Meredith against the wall of the on-call room as she presses her fingers around her clit. 

Both women are still in their scrubs but are enjoying the short time they have together. Addison is fingering the resident while her other hand is latching onto her boob. They move in sync as Meredith finishes in her hands. Meredith suggested they stayed in their scrubs to not waste the time they had. 

Meredith was deep in Addison's center as she just came moments ago. Meredith was grazing her tongue around her sweet juices and sliding her fingers around her folds down to her opening, feeling the shivers Addison gives out. She continues to suck her and starts pumping her fingers roughly to get Addison's second sequential climax out. Addison moans her name softly as she comes. They tried to maintain quiet in the on-call room so they don't draw attention to themselves. Meredith brings herself up to Addison's soft lips and kisses her ever so smoothly. They close their eyes and let the touch of their lips do all the talking. Addison deepens the kiss by tilting her head and inserting her tongue into Meredith's mouth. She tastes herself in her and continues to kiss her deeply. 

They stay in each others arms for a couple more minutes until Addison has to talk about Callie's new baby. Before Addison gets up Meredith pulls her back down and whispers in her ear words that can never be taken back. 

"I love you" 

Addison feels a mix of emotions. She doesn't know whether to feel ecstatic or furious over the fact that they're both taken. Addison doesn't say a word or looks into Meredith's eyes. She stands up, pulls up her bottoms, and walks away. 

Meredith stays in bed a little longer and regrets saying those words to Addison. She doesn't regret saying it she just regrets that Addison didn't take it the way she wanted her to. She does love her and she suspects Addison does too, but she didn't know Addison hadn't accepted this. She understood why she walked away silent but did nothing to stop her. It's been more than two years since they slept together and the sparks were still there. So that's the part she didn't understand. How can Addison not accept her true feelings for her. 

A couple of days after Addison left, Meredith was going through her locker when she found a ripped piece of paper. She recognized the cursive handwriting and felt complete at the phrase she read.

'I love you too' 

********

Addison walked out of that on-call room completely different than ever before. Meredith just confessed her love for her which left her speechless. She couldn't stay and continue because it would have caused major problems in their lives so she did what she knew best, walk away. After she was done with Callie, she wondered the halls. She came across the residents lounge and walked up to the lockers. She immediately knew which one was Meredith's by the items inside. She opened up one of her notebooks and ripped a piece of paper out. She took one of the pens from the locker next door and wrote 'I love you too' with a big smile across her face. She placed it between her notebooks and her clothes. She finally accepted that she loved this girl, but she had to walk away once more. She had a life back in L.A. and she didn't plan on changing the way things are.


	12. L.A. / Fifth Year Residency

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Meredith emails Addison.

"Hey could you take pictures of me in my scrubs?" Asked Meredith to the nurse on the O.B. floor. Meredith posed and smiled. She's wearing her pink scrubs because she's been looking into obstetrics for a couple of days now. After her big fight with Derek, she decided she wouldn't go into neuro so she has to find a new speciality. She really doesn't have a serious connection with anything else but maybe general. 

Meredith has been in a rough patch with Derek. They had Zola taken away and their marriage seems to be falling apart. She needed some comfort and all she would think about was Addison, especially in her pink scrubs. 

Meredith emailed her pictures to Addison with the caption 'I wish you were here to see me in these.' 

***********

Addison is seated at her desk looking over charts of her patients for the day when she received an email. She looked over and went back to her work when she realized the name on the email was Meredith Grey. She stopped everything and opened her email. She started to laugh at the sight of Meredith in pink scrubs. She emailed back and said, "Ha! What are you doing in those? Aren't you supposed to be in surgery rather than delivery?" Addison felt happy that Meredith had reached out to her even if it's been a long time. Her phone started ringing and it was Meredith. 

"Hey! I was glad to see you responded! Did you like those pictures. I may go into obstetrics as my specialty."

"Oh my god, what? Why are you considering obstetrics? I thought you were going into neuro. Also you look good in those pink scrubs."

"Haha, thank you. I'm looking for a new specialty since I left neuro. Honestly it's a long story." 

"I have time. I'm about to go into my lunch break if you want to talk."

"Yeah, okay."

**********

Both women stay on the line for about an hour talking about their current lives. Addison told Meredith about her I.V.F. and how things between her and Sam were a bit shaky. Meredith told Addison about Derek and their fight that led her to choose a new specialty. She also told her about her adoption with Zola and the whole clinical trial mess. Addison tried to say some words of comfort to try and ease her. They shared some good laughs and some freedom from their hard separate lives. 

"It was good talking to you Addison. I wish you were here to see me. You'd be so proud on how I handle my pregnant mothers."

"It would have been a thrilling sight to see Meredith Grey helping moms into labor. I bet you would have made a badass neonatal surgeon if I were there."

There was a brief moment of silence and Addison had to end the call because she was being paged. 

"Well I have to go, I'm being paged. Have a nice day Meredith."

Addison hung up and that made Meredith miss that feeling of serenity she had with Addison. She was slowly coming back to reality and really asked herself what was she doing in O.B. What really made Meredith think is how formal Addison ended their conversation, like if they were only friends and not two women in love. She wondered if Addison did really move on. It made her jealous but she had too much on her plate at the moment and Addison was thousands of miles away. Meredith then gets paged. One of her moms is finally in her late stages of labor.


	13. Derek's Death

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Derek's death causes a commotion.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Spoilers Ahead

It's been over three years since Addison and Meredith talked. Their last encounter was over four years ago. Both women have moved on with their lives and gone on to better things. Addison hasn't visited Grey-Sloan Memorial in over four years and she knows everything has changed. What she doesn't know is about the phone call she will receive from Amelia Shepherd. 

Amelia left Los Angeles on a "vacation" but never came back. She did come to get her stuff but without telling anyone at Seaside Wellness with the exception of Addison. Before Amelia left she gave Addison the most passionate hug and tole her she loved her more than her real sisters. Addison obviously got sad to see her sister go but she supported her no matter what. About every week Amelia and Addison would call to share details about their lives and reconnect. They did text every other day or so, but its mainly iMessage games or cute pics of Henry. They used the calls to actually talk. But this day she could hear something different from the way Amelia was breathing. 

"Addie... um..." Amelia tries to talk but she starts crying about the thought that Derek is dead. 

"Amelia? What is it? I'm here. Just tell me what going on. You're starting to scare me a little." Says Addison shakily. She fears that Amelia relapsed or that she got hurt. 

"Addie... Derek... he died... in... a car cra-" said Amelia as she forced her words to come out. But before she could finish saying crash Addison hung up. Amelia started crying uncontrollably and sat on the floor of the attendings restroom. She wanted to take some pills and get high to hide this void feeling in her. She wanted to see her brother but Meredith stole that away from her. She didn't even have the decency to tell her right away. She's his sister for god's sake. Amelia grabbed her phone and texted Addison the details about his funeral. She then texted her, 'Addie. I need you now more than ever. Please come.' 

********

Addison was in her kitchen when Amelia called her. She was surprised, Amelia usually calls later than this. As soon as she heard her ragged breaths she knew something was up. '... Derek... he died...' Addison stopped hearing what Amelia was saying and everything went blank in her mind. She hit the end call button and placed her phone down on the counter. Jake was upstairs showering Henry. She held the kitchen counter with a grip so hard that her knuckles started to turn white. Everything was blank in Addison's mind. She didn't feel anything, she went numb, and she just stared off into space. Jake started coming down the stairs and just saw Addison staring at the staircase. She looked pale and lost in space.

Jake walked to the kitchen as Henry ran away to play with his toys. "Addison honey, what's wrong?" He said as he went to place his hand on her back. Addison kept staring at the staircase and her facial expression was neutral but a tear fell from her eye. "Addison?" Said Jake concerned for his wife. He grabbed her by the shoulders and turned her to look at him. Addison was facing Jake but her eyes were staring off to the beach. 

Addison couldn't hear anything nor Jake calling her out. She felt like something was ripped from her body. She started to become aware and heard Jake's scared tone as he said her name. She looked up to his eyes and then everything went pitch black. 

"Addison! Addison! Stay with me honey! Addison! SAM! HELP! Henry pass me the phone, NOW!" Screamed Jake as he held Addison in his arms. She passed out completely and he didn't know what was wrong. Henry grabbed Jake's phone from the table and handed it over to him. Sam ran through the patio doors and asked what's wrong. He saw Addison there lifeless but alive. Naomi soon followed and saw her bestfriend on the floor next to Jake and Sam. 

"She's breathing. Help me lift her legs so she can get blood back to her system." Said Sam as he lifted Admissions legs with Jake. 

"What happened!" Said Naomi with a scared tone. Then she heard a buzz from Addison's phone on the counter. She went to reach it and saw it was a message from Amelia. She unlocked the phone and gasped. 

"What?" Said Jake and Sam at the same time. 

Soon tears started to run down Naomi's cheeks and she looked Sam in the eyes. "Derek died." 

Sam felt his heart start beating faster and his breath became short. Then he started hyperventilating and Naomi went into the kitchen to look of a bag. She gave him the bag so he could try and regulate his breathing. Jake knew who Derek was and he understood why Addison had fainted. He looked over and placed his hand on her cheek and kept saying 'Addison, wake up, please.' 

Addison soon started to regain consciousness. Everything was a blur then she saw Sam breathing into a paper bag while Naomi was crying into his shoulder. Then she looked up and saw Jake staring at her with a loss of words. She tried to get up but Jake told her not to move to fast as he helped her up. Now that she was standing she threw herself into Jake's arms as he caught her with in a surprise. She broke down and cried her eyes out. She couldn't believe the man she loved at one point had died. She can't handle that the man she shared eleven years of a marriage with just died. She can't accept that her ex-husband was dead. 

******

It was the funeral and many doctors from Grey-Sloan Memorial were at the cemetery. Derek's sisters and mother were there and many of his old friends. Even Thatcher Grey was there but Meredith never knew that he was in the vicinity. Amelia looked for Addison and there was no signs of her. Meredith just felt gray. Nothing in her life made sense anymore. She was seeing the man she loved being pulled into the earth and she couldn't stop it. Nothing could make her feel better at this point in time. All she could think about is being in that casket with Derek but she couldn't leave her children alone in this dark world. 

It's been days and no one has seen Meredith Grey. People were starting to get concerned about her safety. She had just suddenly disappeared with her kids and no one knew where she was. 

Meredith was sitting at the beach watching her two kids play in the sand. She looked at the waves and thought of ferries. Her eyes got watery but she took a long breath and looked up to the sky to keep her tears in. She was in San Diego where no one would ever know where she was. 

*******

Addison fell into a deeper depression then how she was when Mark had died. She wouldn't talk to anyone. She didn't go into the practice for a week and half. She would take a bottle of wine and lock herself in the restroom. She liked to get into the tub, drink from the bottle, and try to call Derek's cell. This time she was about to dial Meredith's number. If she was feeling destroyed she wondered how Meredith was taking it. Her life might be messed up but Meredith's life was fucked up. She stared at the screen but didn't call. She closed her eyes instead and thought of New York and her days with Mark and Derek. Jake was really passive with her and he understood her grief. He understood her so well and that helped Addison overcome her depression. 

It was about three weeks since Derek's death and Addison was at work but she always took a small break and shut herself in her office to cry over Derek. She was doing better but just the thought that he was gone for good held her in despair. Amelia tried calling her almost every day after the funeral. Amelia knew about Addison's incident and depression through Jake and most people from the practice. 

Addison has her head on her desk as she feels the vibration from her phone. She thinks it must be Amelia. She feels strong enough to talk to her today and she picks up. 

"Addie! I'm glad you responded this time."

"Yeah."

"How are you doing?"

"I'm fine. You?"

"Not so fine. Um hey, why weren't you at the funeral?"

Silence 

"Addie?" 

Silence 

"Okay you don't need to tell me. I miss you. I've really needed you like you have no idea Addie. I almost slipped. And Meredith disappeared and everything has gone to shit."

"What do you mean Meredith disappeared?"

"I just told you I almost did drugs again and you're more concerned about Meredith's whereabouts. Wow okay."

"I'm sorry. I'm glad you didn't though. I'm glad you're alive. I miss you too Amelia."

"Thank you. But yeah Meredith took her kids and just left. Everyone has tried to call her but there's been no response. I think Alex Karev said he got to her but she just said she was okay. So at least she's okay but no one really knows where she is." 

"Oh my. That's terrible. Hey listen I have to go. Call me again tomorrow? I miss you."

"Oh okay. Yeah I'll call. Love you Addie."

Now Addison's head was filled with grief and anxiety not knowing that Meredith is okay. She feels a like her heart shrunk even more now that she knows the woman she once loved is gone. The only thing that keeps her at peace is knowing she's alive. She places her back on her desk and sobs softly.


	14. L.A. / San Diego to L.A.

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Meredith watches Addison.

Meredith is in her third trimester of her pregnancy. After Derek died she took a pregnancy test and she was positive. Today she thought about taking her kids to L.A. without the thought that Addison lives there. At this point Meredith is living life through the motions. Taking it day by day. She's in limbo like she's in an alternate universe from the rest of the world and she's trying her best to cope with what's happening. She walks with her kids through the city, visits Hollywood's walk of fame, then ends up at the beach near the pier. 

Meredith took them to a park in front of the beach then as the heat went down a bit she walked across the sidewalk to let them play on the sand. They seemed happy and that broke her heart yet helped her too. She then heard a recognizable laugh coming from behind her. She turned and saw Addison with a tall tan man, who must be Jake, and her son playing on the swings. She was laughing while she watched her husband crack jokes with their kid. Meredith felt a bit of happiness seeing her. She wanted to say hi but she couldn't. So instead she just watched the beautiful redhead live in her happy family. 

It started to get dark and she helped Zola and Bailey change into dry clothes. She turned around to see if Addison has left yet and she was still there. She did see that Addison was starting to pack up so she tried to hurry up and leave before she noticed. She grabbed their things walked on the sidewalk towards the parking lot. She heard Addison coming in her direction and she did not look over and tried her best to pretend she wasn't there. She walked over to her car and helped her kids into the car. While she was placing her beach items into the trunk she saw Addison walking along the shore and splashing water to her kid and husband. She closed the trunk and stood there for a few more seconds. Addison seemed so happy and all Meredith could do is feel happy for her. She was glad to see her in a good place. She got in her car and drove out to the street. 

*******

Addison was pushing Henry on the swings when he started laughing because they saw another child trip and fall. Jake started to make fun of the kid to make them laugh even more. 

"Jake! That's not nice!" She said as she lightly hit his shoulder. He then grabbed her by the waist and lifted her up a bit. She started to laugh and ask Jake to put her down. Instead he carried her over his shoulder and walked away as Henry laughed because his mommy was helpless. Henry grabbed Addison's ankle to help his dad hold Addison. 

"Jake! Let me go! Henry sweetie, tell daddy to put me down."

Henry giggled and ran away to the slides. Jake continued to laugh a bit as he put her down on the floor without letting go of her waist. He held her there as Addison looked into his eyes and said, "I love you." Jake leaned in and kissed her softly. 

"Ewwwwwww!" Said Henry as he saw his parents kissing. He then threw some sand at them and ran away. Addison looked surprised as she opened her mouth and pushed herself off Jake and ran towards Henry in a chase. Jake then ran behind her. They never noticed that Meredith Grey was watching that moment in Addison's life. 

Addison walked back and sat on the swing facing the direction of the beach. She then noticed a blonde woman sitting on a towel facing the ocean. She seemingly recognized those features but then saw a pregnant belly. She thought the woman resembled Meredith, but why would she even be in L.A. she thought. She brushed off the thought and walked back to the park. Since knowing Meredith had left Seattle she pictures her face on random blonde women around the city. She felt it was her imagination making her think of her. She shook that feeling off as she saw Henry walk back to her. 

It started to get late and she insisted Jake that they should go. They grabbed their things and walked toward the sidewalk. Then Henry raced them to the beach. They walked right passed the blonde pregnant lady with her two kids. Addison didn't notice her and instead looked at Henry the whole time. Jake chased Henry around the shore as they started to get wet. Addison placed their stuff on the sand and walked over to her family. She felt at peace loving this moment with her family. Henry then splashed water on her clothes and scram. 

"I'm going to get you!" Yelled Addison as she ran to him. 

They splashed water to each other and played tag. A few moments after Jake and Henry sat down and tried building a sand castle. The moon started to come out and Addison stood on the shore as the waves came crashing into her feet. She closed her eyes and took in the scent of the ocean. Henry and Jake were building a sand castle and she just felt everything was great. She hasn't cried for Derek in over a month and her grief got less intense day by day. She felt this was one of the happiest moments in her life. She turned back and sat next to Jake as she watched them build. She then lays her head on Jake's shoulder and takes in this moment.


	15. Back to Seattle / Attending

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Addison comes back to Seattle.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay here is where I diverge completely from the show but with cannon references. There's spoilers of the later seasons of Grey's Anatomy. Hope y'all enjoy.

It has been so many years since Addison last saw Meredith. She did get a call from Alex asking her for a recommendation for Meredith so she could keep her medical license. She was glad she could do something to help her. When she received that call it was like a blast from the past. She's happy now with Jake and Henry. She runs the practice and she even renovated the building. Her practice was named one of the best medical facilities in California. A few days after her call with Alex she received another call from Miranda Bailey. She's currently the chief of GSMH and asked her if she could come back for a consult. She had an emergent patient who would need a series of 3 surgeries, which meant Addison would have to stay in Seattle for a little over a week. 

"Okay honey, this is my stop. Call me everyday and make sure this boy does his homework. I love you." She told Jake as she kissed him goodbye. She turned and faced her grown little boy. "I love you too Henry. Make sure you text me every day. I'll only be gone for about a week. You and your father better not do anything crazy." She smiled and got out of the car. She felt like she was going to a whole different world. As she saw Jake ride off she felt like something was going to change as soon as she got on that flight. 

Addison arrived in Seattle during the afternoon. Before she could go to the hospital she had to check in at The Archfield and grab a bite to eat. The smell of the water and the view of the city just brought her back all those years. Years with Derek, Mark, and Meredith. She couldn't wait to see her again but she just wanted to completely shut her out so she can live her life right. When she was done with her lunch she called an Uber to take her to the hospital. 

*******

Meredith overheard Bailey talking about Addison coming to perform a series of surgeries and she got sick to her stomach when she heard that. She thought Addison was completely out of her life, but she's supposed to be coming in today. She felt nauseous at the thought of Addison's presence. She was able to let her go years ago but not in the best way. To make herself not love her she had to hate her. It was really hard for her to hate her but Addison never showed up to the funerals for Mark and Derek, she didn't call to congratulate her for her Harper Avery (Catherine Fox) award, and she lost total connection with her years ago. She knows that she constantly talks to Amelia so she knew Addison stopped talking to her on purpose and all of that made it easier for her to hate her. 

All the neonatal surgeons were gone from the hospital. First Addison, then Herman came and Arizona studied under her, but then Arizona left as well. So we needed to call Addison since she was the closest and one of the best. Yet Meredith doesn't want to see her. She kinda regrets not telling anyone about their relationship and she can't tell anyone now because the people she really wants to tell aren't here with her anymore. She tries to focus and continue with her work today like every thing is normal.

Meredith is leaning against the nurses station in the lobby talking to Maggie as she sees Addison walking out of the elevator. The tall Dr. Montgomery-Reilly looks like the definition of perfection. She's wearing a carmel long woolen coat, white turtleneck shirt tucked into her black high waisted belted pants, along with her suede carmel pointy tip stilettos. Her hand is bent carrying her leather bag while she holds her black sunglasses. She has dyed her hair a shade of brown while her ends are a soft blonde which go so well on her skin tone. Her makeup is subtle except her signature red lipstick. Meredith can't help and just admire her beauty. She does look older but that doesn't change the fact that she is still as gorgeous from when she first saw her. 

Addison walks into the remodeled lobby and almost feels like she's at the wrong hospital. She walks towards the nurse station and sees Meredith Grey staring at her. She looks almost the same but she can see her maturity and seriousness through her. She doesn't look like her young playful self from their adventures years ago. Well she has gone through so much trauma and obstacles since she last saw her. She can tell everything has hardened her and she wonders if she'll even try to talk to her. Before she reaches the desk she gets an unexpected hug on her side. 

"Addie!! Oh my gosh you're here! I missed you soooooo much!" 

"Ohh Amelia, I've missed you too!" Said Addison as she wrapped her free hand around Amelia relishing this nice reunion. "Everything looks so different and so new. I felt like I was walking into the wrong hospital." 

"Yeah. They've remodeled and made this place look better. But my god Addie, you look so good! How's Jake and Henry?" 

"They're great! Henry has been getting a little more rebellious but we've been able to calm him and Jake is just great. I'm really happy you know." Says Addison as she walks with Amelia to look for Bailey. 

"That's Derek's ex-wife!?" Asked Maggie in a surprised tone as she faced Meredith who was still staring at Addison. 

"Huh. Oh right. Yeah that's Addison Montgomery." Said Meredith sheepishly. 

"Wow she's so..."

"Gorgeous."

"I was going to say pretty but gorgeous works too." 

******

Addison finished talking with her patient and talked to Bailey for a course of treatment. She was going to do the first surgery tomorrow afternoon. Addison felt pumped being able to order interns and residents around. She forgot how she missed this. She went into the attendings lounge to get her things and noticed Meredith sitting on the couch. She opened the cabinet and got her purse and switched from her doctors coat to her actual coat. There was a silence that she couldn't decipher if it was awkward or aggression.

"You couldn't call in all these years." Finally said Meredith as she broke the silence. 

"Meredith"

"Oh don't Meredith me. You were the one who ended our last connection. I'm just asking why. Why was it that you couldn't call? Why was it that you couldn't come to Derek's funeral? Why is it that you couldn't talk to me right now without me starting this conversation?"

"Well what do you want me to say Grey? Oh sorry I was busy living my life. Oops sorry I should have stopped everything and make time for you. It's not that simple and you know that. I didn't make it to Derek's funeral because at the time I didn't have the strength to accept that he's gone. It took me a long time to cope and get myself out of a terrible depression. I know you had it worse but he was also mine for eleven years. That's not something that I could just throw away."

"You still didn't answer my question. Why can't you talk to me?"

"I don't need to justify my choices to you Meredith." Said Addison in a stubborn tone as she walked towards the door before Amelia entered the room. 

"Woah what's wrong here?"

"Oh nothing. Me and Meredith were just chatting. Actually I was on my way out. I'm starving." 

"Oh no Addie don't go. Hey Meredith is it cool that she comes over for dinner? Maggie is going to cook spaghetti!"

"No that's perfect. She should totally come over."

"Whaddya say Addie?"

"It's such a nice offer Amelia but I wouldn't want to intrude or anything."

"You aren't harming anyone. This way we can talk over dinner."

"Please Addie!"

"Okay alright." Says Addison with a subtle angry tone. 

"I'm driving." Says Meredith as she picks up her keys and walks out the door as Addison and Amelia follow. 

*******

Meredith is driving and her rearview mirror is set directly towards Addison's face. Amelia is sitting on the passenger seat blasting music in the car. The car ride is silent between Meredith and Addison but Amelia sings the lyrics of her favorite songs without noticing the weird atmosphere. As they pull up to Meredith's driveway they see Maggie pulling out. Amelia gets out of the car first and asks where she's going. 

"Sorry I've been paged 911 to the hospital. My patient is going to need another surgery because of his complications. I think I may take all night." Yells Maggie across the street. 

"Did you at least make dinner?" Screamed Amelia.

"Yes!" Yelled Maggie back before she drove off. 

"Well at least dinner is ready." Said Amelia as she turned towards both women on the driveway. 

Addison realizes she's never been to Meredith's house and this will be her first time here. She's glad to be spending time with Amelia but she feels concerned on how Meredith is going to act. All three ladies walk together into the house.


	16. Back to Seattle / Attending Pt. 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Addison is over for dinner.

"Mommy! Auntie Amelia! Oh um hi!" Said Zola as she ran to hug Meredith with Bailey and Ellis following her. Meredith's children cling on to her legs and waist. She feels so happy coming home to them. She then smiles at the nanny signifying that she's free to leave. 

"Hey kids this is Dr. Montgomery." Says Amelia as she points towards Addison. 

Addison smiles and says, "Hi! You can call me Addison!" 

Meredith forgets about the anger she had towards Addison and just let's her children bombard her with questions. She goes into the kitchen and pulls out plates for dinner. 

"Hey guys dinner is ready!" Shouts Meredith. Soon everyone walks into the kitchen as Meredith hands them plates. She places the bowl of spaghetti and a plate of breadsticks in the center of the table. As everyone starts to grab food Meredith says, "Make sure you leave some for Auntie Maggie. She did cook this." 

Everyone has a pretty normal dinner. The kids keep asking Addison about living on the beach. They ask her if the ocean has ever gotten inside her house. Addison laughs at that and Amelia tries to explain to them that it doesn't happen like that. Meredith enjoys seeing Addison in a good mood. It makes her rancor grow smaller. 

Addison and Amelia are sitting on the living room couch watching Meredith's kids play. They catch up on how things are at Seaside Wellness and how everyone is doing. She tells her about the renovation and the reviews her practice has gotten. She goes on about the raise in profits has helped them reinvest in new accommodations for the practice. Meredith overhears part of Addison's accomplishments and feels a sense of pride for her. She stayed in the kitchen for bit trying to clean up. She finishes putting all the dishes in the sink and gets a bottle of wine from the cabinet. She grabs two wine glasses and goes out into the living room. She passes the bottle and the wine glasses to Addison without a word. They exchange head nods and Meredith tells her kids it's time for bed. 

As Meredith is putting her kids to sleep Addison pours herself and Meredith wine as she continues her conversation with Amelia. Meredith then comes back to the living room and sits across from them on her armchair. They all end up talking about the changes in the hospital and how everyone has changed. This makes Meredith and Addison nostalgic about their encounters in the past. 

"Oh no! I'm being paged to the hospital. Must be a trauma. Gosh Addie I don't want to go."

"It's fine. I'll be here all week. We can continue to catch up tomorrow. Go. As a matter of fact it is getting late I should get going as well." 

"Okay see you guys later." Says Amelia as she gets her things and walks out the front door. 

It's just Addison and Meredith in the living room. Addison finishes her wine and then Meredith speaks. 

"So, you never answered my question."

"Look I have a surgery tomorrow and it's getting late. I don't have time for this. I did enjoy dinner and thank you for having me." Says Addison as she grabs her phone and tries to order an uber. Yet something tells her to not to completely order it. 

"Is it because you love me?"

"W-what? Why would you say that?"

"Really? I think it's because you don't want to ruin your marriage or accept the fact that maybe I was someone worth having in your life."

"What are you trying to say Meredith. Because it sounds like you're saying that I didn't want to talk to you because you think it was a danger to my relationship. Well sorry to burst your bubble but honestly we just grew apart. There was never a friendship between us. And what we had was just fooling around."

"Oh really! So the time you came for Callie was just fooling around. Or the time you left me that note saying 'I love you too'. Or what about the times we had sex. That didn't seem like some sort of unattached thing it seemed real. What scares you is that you think that YOU are going to fall back in love with me."

"Well from how things happen in my life I didn't want that to happen again. Sorry if I wanted to keep my sanity and my family together. You shouldn't care. We haven't talked in ages. And it seems like you've moved on to do better things. Why does it bother you?"

"It didn't bother me until now. Seeing you back in Seattle. Don't you?"

"No not really. I'm happy now. I'm married and I have a beautiful boy. What do you want me to say. Oh that I'm heartbroken or that I couldn't stop thinking of you all those years."

"You can't say you haven't thought about what we've had. I know you have and you can't lie about that."

They both sat there in silence for some time as Addison poured herself some more wine. What scared her is that Meredith was right. She did think about her all the time but not as often like the beginning. She did stop talking to her because she's afraid of falling back to her. She's afraid of that right now. How would Jake feel. How would she feel if she cheated on Jake. She wouldn't be able to forgive herself this time. So instead she tried to fight off Meredith's questions and pretend like she has completely moved on. 

Meredith stands up and goes to the kitchen. She knows what she said was the truth. She knows Addison is deflecting her questions because she's too afraid to admit it. That makes her even more angry and she just wants to yell 'I hate you' to the woman she loves. She walks over to the sink and starts to do the dishes as she hears footsteps walking into the kitchen. Addison places the empty bottle of wine and the wine glasses on the table. She then sits on the stool near the counter and looks at Meredith doing the dishes.

"Look, I'm sorry for not being there at Derek's funeral. I'm sorry I couldn't come and comfort you."

Silence.

"I'm sorry I haven't stayed in touch. I was just thinking about myself. I couldn't trust myself to maintain a relationship between us so instead I erased you from my life."

Silence.

Addison stands up and walks over to Meredith. She stands about a feet away so they aren't right next to each other because Addison doesn't want to give herself the space where she can grab Meredith and kiss her so she keeps her distance. 

"I'm sorry Meredith. I truly am. I'm here now."

Meredith turns off the faucet and dries her hands. She turns and looks up to Addison. "You know I did see you after Derek had died."

"What? How?"

"I left Seattle and lived in San Diego for a while. One day I took my kids to L.A. to explore. I had completely forgotten that you lived there. Earlier in the evening we went to the beach near the pier. I remember I recognized your laugh and as I turned around it was you. I saw you with your husband and son playing in the park. I had barely lost Derek but I got to see you enjoy something you never had. It made me a bit jealous but overall I felt happy for you. You seemed truly happy and I've never seen you that way. You looked radiant and I felt like I was watching your story unfold. Before I left we passed each other on the sidewalk and maybe you didn't recognize me because I was pregnant. Before I had gotten into my car I just stood next to it watching you play with your family along the shore. Seeing you that day made my grief more bearable then it had been. Seeing you made me remember the reasons I loved you. Seeing you that day made me understand that you needed that happy ending so I just let myself let you go. But the truth is Addison, I had to force myself to hate you. Because having the thought of you loving someone else that wasn't me made me feel sad. And seeing you now has made me feel nauseous and scared because I have to face you."

Addison felt tears run down her face while Meredith was telling her that. She felt like that woman on the beach that day was Meredith and she regrets not actually trying to see her that day. One of her favorite moments with Jake and Henry had Meredith in the background. She felt like something was just ripped off her when Meredith finished her speech. She only ignored her because she's afraid of her love for her. After Meredith finishes Addison just looks at her and is speechless. Addison turns around and walks for the living room to get her things. 

"Addison!" Says Meredith watching Addison make her way towards the living room. She leans her back towards her kitchen counter as she stares at the ground trying to contain her sadness. 

Addison almost reaches for her purse before she marches back into the kitchen. She sees Meredith leaning against the counter and continues towards her. She lifts her head, cups her cheek, and kisses her roughly. 

'Fuck' thinks Addison.

Meredith is shocked feeling Addisons lips on hers. It's been forever but the electricity between their bodies makes Meredith forget everything. She places her hands around Addison's neck. Addison then lowers her hand that's cupping Meredith's cheek and lifts her up to the counter with both of her hands. Meredith sits on the counter with her legs spread open so Addison can be closer to her. Their kiss feels like homecoming. Like years of hidden feelings coming out with every tongue stroke or movement of their lips. It feels like everything around them is gone and they're the only people in this world. The kiss is electric. The kiss is everything.


	17. Back to Seattle / Attending Pt. 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Meredith smiles.

Addison pulls back Meredith's hair to unveil her neck. She bites the space between her collarbone and neck, leaving a mark. Meredith moans at the pain from that bite as she let's Addison mark her. Addison then rips open her button up shirt to expose her abdomen and black lacy bra. Meredith clings to the edge of the counter while leaning back a little to let Addison see her better. Another moan escapes Meredith's mouth as she feels Addison bite her upper chest. Addison comes up and kisses Meredith until they're without air. Meredith tries to take off her shirt in the process of feeling electrifying with every kiss. She cups both of Addison's cheeks and tilts her head to give them more room. Addison has her hands on Meredith's waist as her legs are wrapped around her hips. Meredith leans her head back as Addison starts to trail kisses along her jawline. Her bra straps are falling and slighty show the top of her breasts. 

Addison picks up Meredith while she holds the bottom of her thighs. She walks them over to the table. They both shove anything in their way to the edge. Meredith is laying on the table completely ready for whatever Addison is about to do. Addison slowly takes off Meredith's shoes then snakes up her legs to her waist and unbuckles her belt. She then unzips her pants and grabs her by the hips and the seem of her pants. With all her force she pulls her pants and panties down in one swift motion. Meredith moans with Addison's forceful way of taking her pants off. Addison also left a long scratch mark during her swift motion. 

Addison lowers herself on one knee to be right in front of Meredith's core. She grabs one of Meredith's legs and places it on her shoulder. She grabs the other leg and moves it under her arm as Meredith wraps it around her. Addison then softly grabs Meredith's folds with her teeth to give Meredith that sensation of pain and pleasure. Addison pushes her face in and uses her tongue to rub on her opening. She has one of her hands rubbing circles on her clit while she gently inserts two fingers into Meredith's wet center. Meredith moans as she arches her back on the wooden surface. She holds the edges of the table so she can have something to transfer that energy of pleasure. Addison swirls her fingers as she pumps them in and out. That always puts Meredith in a daze. She continues to lick and suck on her fold to take in her wetness. The familiar taste of Meredith takes her back years to the first night they shared. It helps Addison get wet as she sucks Meredith clean. Meredith is about to reach her climax as she tries to yell but instead holds her breath to not wake the kids. With one more thrust of Addison's fingers, Meredith comes while she let's out a long moan sigh. 

"Oh how I fucking missed that." Says Meredith. 

"Mmm. I've always been fond of your taste." Says Addison as she lifts herself up and licks her lips. She starts to pat her pants to get rid of any dust on them. She stands and looks at Meredith's almost naked body just splayed across the table. She forgot to take off her bra but the look of her body is enough to make her dirty. 

"What are you staring at? Aren't we going to finish. I want to give you back the favor you did for me." Says Meredith as she sits on the table. 

"Look Grey. I've got a surgery tomorrow and it's gotten very late. I have to get some rest but you can find me tomorrow. You always do." Says Addison seductively as she walks away to the living room to collect her personal belongings. Meredith let's Addison go because she is right and they might have woken up the kids if they continued to go at it. 

Meredith hops off the table and grabs her pants from the floor and pulls them up. She then pulls her shirt from the counter and tries to button it up but she realizes most of her buttons must have fallen off so she just leaves her shirt open. She walks over to the sink and continues to wash the dishes. 

*******

Amelia pulls up to the driveway and it's about 1am in the morning and she sees Addison get into an Uber. She left about two hours ago and she's confused why Addison is barely leaving now. She walks through the front door and she thinks Meredith must have gone to sleep since she hears nothing. She walks over to the kitchen and sees Meredith washing the dishes. The vibe of the kitchen seems weird and she notices little details that seem fishy to her. She sees the table is completely empty except for everything at the edge, she sees Meredith's shoes on different sides of the floor, and she sees Meredith's hair is very messy. She doesn't think much of it but it just doesn't sit right with her.

"Hey, I just saw Addison get into an Uber just now. I thought she left when I left. Why was she barely leaving now?"

Meredith doesn't want to turn around because her shirt is still unbuttoned. She just continues to wash the dishes and hopes Amelia doesn't walk up to her. "Oh, we ended up talking after you left. We caught up on how are lives are and we may have gotten a little bit drunk. Just a little."

"Oh well that explains why this place is such a mess. Okay I'm goin' to bed now. Night." Says Amelia as she turns and walks for the stairs. 

Meredith finishes the dishes and just feels joy and gets turned on again with all this secrecy with Addison. It feels nice to linger around and not let anyone in their sexy moments. She cleans up the table and grabs her shoes as she walks out the kitchen and turns the lights off. She walks upstairs with a huge smile on her face. 

*******

Addison leans against the backseat window as they drive towards her hotel. She feels disappointed with herself but she tries to think it wasn't sex it was just a night with a friend. She just thinks about Meredith and wanting more of her but she allowed herself to stop before things went further. She really did want to continue and she would have but her conscience kept telling her that she's married and she's cheated before and it didn't end well. She wants to call Jake and tell him everything but he might not understand this. He may be understanding about everything but this would be the last straw. To get her mind off things she looks at her camera roll and watches videos of Henry as a toddler. Nothing feels right anymore.


	18. Seattle Day 2 / Attending

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Addison finds pleasure.

Addison arrives at the hospital early in the morning to study her patients chart and work through her surgery strategy. 

"Addison!"

She hears the familiar voice behind her and feels nostalgic to her days at Seattle Grace. "Richard!" She says as she turns around and hugs him. "It's been forever Richard! How are you?"

"I'm doing well. How are you though? How's the husband and kid?"

"Oh Jake is such a sweetheart and Henry has reached that age where he thinks he knows everything. I love them! What about Catherine?" Asks Addison as she thought of Meredith while she said all that.

"Oh she's great..." continues Richard as he walks with Addison down the hall as they keep the conversation going.

********

Meredith is looking at the board seeing when she should schedule her appy. She notices Addison is going to be in O.R. 3 at noon. She must be in the hospital so Meredith walks away to look for her. She comes across Richard as he stops to talk to her.

"Oh Meredith have you seen Addison. We just had a nice little chat since she's back. My, it's been years since I last saw her."

"Yeah, she came over last night for dinner. Amelia invited her since they're close. Where did you last see her?" 

"Oh she was last checking her patients labs."

Meredith smiles at him as she walks away to look for Addison. They have about two hours until Addison's surgery. She thinks they can continue what they had last night. Meredith then realizes she's acting immature looking for someone just to sneak around with. She hasn't acted this way since the beginning of her relationship with Derek. She shakes of those feelings and goes back to the board to schedule her appy. 

She sees the beautiful Attending looking at the board. "I was just looking for you." Says Meredith as she stands next to her. She grabs the marker and schedules her appy at 11am so she still has time to watch Addison work through the gallery. 

"Oh you have a surgery?"

"Yeah but I'll be done before you finish yours. I'll even stop by and watch. (Whispers) Maybe we can even finish after your surgery too."

Addison clears her throat and walks away before she could say something about her marriage or anything. She really does want to go with Meredith but she can't bring herself to set up boundaries. As she walks away she can't stop thinking about how Meredith looked last night and she bites her lip. Meredith smiles as she feels she made Addison flustered at the thought of continuing their adventure from last night. 

********

(After their surgeries)

"Mmm. Did you lock the door." Says Addison as Meredith kisses her while pushing them to the bed in the on-call room.

"Yes, now shut up." Says Meredith as she lifts up Addison's scrub top to show her red pushup bra. "Oh this bra makes your boobs look so delicious." Meredith then grabs her waist and pushes her down on the bed. Addison pulls Meredith's top and helps her take it off. She lays on the bed while Meredith is on top of her planting kisses all around her chest and neck. She reaches for her hook and unwraps her bra to let Meredith see her prized possession. Meredith slides her tongue down from her neck to her perfectly upright nipple. She circles her tongue then starts to suck while she massages her other nipple. Addison loves the feeling of Meredith's mouth and finger and she slightly hums at the pressure.

Meredith kisses her breasts and lowers herself more to the edge of her bottoms. She grabs Addison by the hips and kisses her lower abdomen. She rubs her palm over her pants across her center. Addison feels her core get wet. Meredith then grabs her pants and lowers them to her ankles. She places her legs into a criss cross position so she can see and feel her opening better. Addison feels Meredith's tongue enter her and arches her back and moans. It has been years and no one has been able to satisfy her this way unlike Meredith. She grabs on the beds rail because she's so close and Meredith hasn't done much yet.

Meredith slides her middle finger and bends her finger inside her. That makes Addison moan loudly and Meredith continues that bending motion. She moves her tongue to her clit and swirls it in circles. She loves to place kisses on her clit because it sends Addison in a frenzy. She kisses her folds then moves to the inside of her thigh. She bites the inside of her thigh as she sticks her second finger inside her all at the same time. Addison let's out a soft scream because Meredith gave her a dose of pain and pleasure at once. Her breaths start becoming more ragged and rapid as she nears her finish. Meredith moves her mouth back to her folds as she starts to suck her wetness into her mouth. She continuously flicks her fingers inside Addison as she buckles. Her warm juicy fluids run down her fingers and hand. Meredith pulls her fingers out and sucks them. 

"Mmmmmm. I've missed your taste."

Addison smiles and Meredith moves up towards her face. Meredith opens her mouth as she goes for her lips and before their lips meet she shoves her wet fingers in her mouth. Addison moans and then starts to suck on her. The feeling of Addison's tongue on her fingers makes Meredith even more wet than before. Meredith doesn't like having sex in the on-call room because it always has to be sped up or shortened. She enjoys when they have all the time to their self because she can give Addison better orgasms. Meredith pulls out her fingers and kisses her. Addison grabs her ass with one hand as she unhooks her bra with the other. Meredith moves up to let her bra fall off her. Addison grabs Meredith by her waist as she starts to suck on her perky pink nipples. Meredith arches her back into Addison and moans at the touch of her wet tongue. 

Addison kicks of her shoes and waves her legs around until her pants finally fall off. She lays on her side while kissing Meredith. She is still wearing her pants but that's no problem. They stop kissing for a moment and Meredith looks into Addisons eyes as they sparkle. She softly brushes her hand up Addison's thigh up to her chest. The feeling of Addison's smooth curves on her fingers gives her a wave of excitement. Addison allows Meredith to stroke her body. No one else does that to her not even Jake. She loves the way Meredith admires her body. She takes the time to feel every inch of her and Addison enjoys that so much. It makes her feel loved and whole.

Meredith moves Addison back on her back as she still lays on her side. One of her hands is supporting her head up and her other hand is just grazing across Addison's skin. She moves her fingertips along her breasts down to her lower abdomen. She slightly brushes her clit up to her waist. Addison has her eyes closed and hums with every stroke Meredith makes on her naked body. Meredith is just mesmerized with her body and wants to mark her like she's her territory. 

Addison's phone goes off as she's being paged to the E.R. "Of course they page me now." Says Addison kind of annoyed. She stands up and puts her clothes back on. Meredith continues to lay on the bed just watching Addison cover her delicious body. Addison bites her lip when she notices Meredith watching her then she bends down to grab Meredith's shirt and throws it to her face. 

"Hey!"

"Hey yourself. Get dressed."

Meredith puts her bra back on and then slips her shirt over her head as Addison walks out the door. She falls back on the bed just thinking about Addison's body. They've aged since the last time they've been together but her body remains gorgeous and sexy. She feels lovestruck and continues to fantasize about her body, touch, and taste.


	19. Seattle Day 2 / Attending Pt. 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which both women take a shower.

Meredith comes down to E.R. into Trauma room 2. There's a critical pregnant patient who needs surgery immediately. 

"Let me take a look at her scans." Says Meredith to an intern.

"We need to take her to the O.R. now!" Shouts Addison to the room as they prep the patient for transport. 

Both women are in the scrub room washing their hands. They look at each other and smile. They go into the O.R. and work together on this patient. As Meredith works in the abdomen's organs Addison delivers the baby c-section. The mother starts to bleed out and the O.B. in the room says that she can't do anything. Meredith watches as Addison takes over and stops the bleeding and helps the woman get her sats up. Meredith just admires Addison's skills and that makes her look so hot. After Addison finds the bleeder she looks up and catches Meredith staring at her. She smiles under her mask and winks at her. She tells the pediatrician to take the child to the nursery since she's healthy and stable. She stays with Meredith watching over the mothers cut in case she bleeds again. Meredith fixes the mother's intestines and they start to close up. They walk back to the scrub room.

"Wow. I forgot of how much of a god you are!" Says Meredith enthusiastically.

"Me? Oh no Grey, you were the rockstar. They way you repaired her intestines so quickly without cutting any portion. Wow I can see what a brilliant surgeon you've become." 

Meredith smiles at Addison. Their connection feels like a school girl crush but they enjoy it. Addison hasn't really thought about Jake or Henry today and all that goes through her mind is Meredith. She told herself that whatever happens in Seattle stays in Seattle. She's been able to leave everything behind when she leaves so what would make this trip any different. She walks to the door and tells Meredith before walking out, "You know that they gave me the same hotel room from the first night you came over." Meredith just watches her walk away and takes the hint.

It's early into the evening and Addison left already. Meredith was just about to leave before Maggie catches her.

"Hey Meredith. I'm not going to make it home tonight. I have an eight hour surgery in a few minutes. Just a heads up."

"Okay." Says Meredith as she thinks about calling Amelia to ask her to watch her kids. She grabs her phone and dials. No answer. She texts the nanny saying if she could stay late with the kids because she is being caught late in the hospital. She knows Amelia is off tonight so she texts her asking her to go home and watch the kids because she has to work late. She takes the elevator and smirks because she's on her way to see Addison.

*********

*Knock Knock*

Addison opens the door while on the phone and signals Meredith to come in. Meredith tries to listen to who she's talking to as she sits on the bed waiting for her.

"Yeah it was just room service. I ordered dinner because I'm tired and I'm going to pass out... Yeah the surgery went well! Patient was fine, she was a bleeder though... I love you too. Bye." 

Meredith feels a bit jealous that Addison told her husband that instead of her. She knows Addison deserves her happy ending but what about her. She's been through so much, why can't she just have a single constant in her life. She leans on her side and watches Addison stand up.

"I was about to take a shower you know. I'm still going to. Care to join me?" Asks Addison as she bites her lip while she walks into the bathroom. Meredith stays on the bed and just watches Addison carefully take her clothes off. Soon the fair skinned woman turns on the shower and gets in. Meredith gets off the bed and quickly takes off her clothes. She walks straight towards Addison and stands there just taking in the pleasant view. Watching the water drip and run down Addison's curves makes her wet. Seeing her beautiful hair lose its volume and just stick to her body makes her restless. Admiring her gorgeous face while the water goes through her lips and neck makes Meredith tense. She opens the glass door and steps in. The space is a little confined for both of them, but that serves in their favor. 

Addison stands to the side to allow Meredith to stand directly under the showerhead. Addison walks directly behind her and grabs Meredith's boobs as Meredith lifts her hands over head to push her hair back. The water falls on them directly and Addison bites Meredith's earlobe as she continues to play with her boobs. 

Addison whispers into Meredith's ear as she asks, "Can I wash your hair?" Meredith nods her head as the other woman grabs the shampoo. Addison moves her fingers into her scalp while gently massaging it. She pulls her hair up and lathers the shampoo. She strokes her neck up to her scalp. Meredith has her eyes closed as she enjoys her fingers massaging her head. This makes her relax and live in this simple moment. Addion pulls her hair to make her head bend back. She moves them under the showerhead as the water hits their faces. Addison bends down slightly to be right next to Meredith's neck. She bites her neck as Meredith has the water hit her face directly. The soap from her hair is soon gone and Addison grabs the back of her head and pushes her against the glass. Meredith has both her hands leaning against the glass as she feels Addison bite the back of her neck. 

Meredith feels a little rough texture across her back and realizes Addison is cleaning her. The rough patch almost touches her wet center. Addison moves the sponge up to Meredith's abdomen as Meredith grabs her wrist and pulls the sponge out of her hand. She grabs the other wrist and spins them around. She pushes Addison into the glass. She let's go and faces her delicious naked wet body. She soaps Addison's breast and lets the sponge fall. She kisses her neck and takes in the water dripping from her. She makes her way down to her breasts and pinches her nipples as Addison moans. She bends down further and bites Addison's hip hardly. Addison screams knowing it hurt and no one can hear them. Meredith finally bends all the way down to her opening. 

"Hold on to something." Instructs Meredith. She grabs one of her legs and places it over her shoulder as Addison grabs on to the rail for support. Meredith starts to suck Addison's mixed wetness with water. Addison moans constantly at the sensation of Meredith's lips. That's twice today that Meredith has gone to eat her out. Meredith easily slides two fingers into Addison's core as she let's out a loud moan. She pumps her fingers very rapidly so Addison can orgasm. Addison grabs on to the rail as her knuckles turn white. The feeling Meredith's tongue and fingers inside her makes her unravel. She comes to a finish as she says Meredith's name.

Meredith takes in Addison's juices and sucks her clean. She places her leg down and makes her way back up her body. She stops at her waist where she can see her bite forming a mark. She sucks on the bite to make the color more vibrant. Addison loves how Meredith marks her. She enjoys the pain as it gives her a wave of electricity. Meredith comes up to her breasts and gently pulls on one of her nipples with her teeth. Addison moans loudly as Meredith just takes her sweet time. Meredith finally meets her face and kisses her. Before Addison can wrap her arms around her, Meredith intertwines their fingers and pushes her arms back against the the glass. Addison smiles into Meredith's mouth as she likes her forceful way. 

As they kiss, Meredith shoves her leg between Addison's thighs as she starts to rub her there. She moves her leg to cause friction against her clit. Addison tries to reach for Meredith but she holds her hands back as she continues to kiss her deeply. The water is falling more over Meredith than Addison but they still enjoy the splash that falls over their bodies. Addison enjoys Meredith taking the lead but she can't hold back anymore. She pushes Meredith off her and grabs her by the waist and flips her around. She still leans on the glass but both of them face the same side. Addison is taller than the blonde and she uses that to her advantage. She slides two fingers into Meredith's wet opening and holds on to one breast while kissing Meredith. She roughly dips her fingers in and out while her thumb randomly touches her clit. Meredith moans and loves the unexpected tingle of her clit. Meredith stands on her tippy toes to make herself more level with Addison's lips.

"Ohhh! Addison! I'm going to come! Oh Addison!"

Meredith arches her back into Addison's body as her fingers reach deeper inside. Meredith moves her hands over her head and grabs the back of Addison's neck to keep balance. Addison bites her neck as she goes faster inside Meredith. She finally climaxes but Addison doesn't stop nor does she slow down. While Meredith is riding out her orgasm she makes her climax face and Addison takes advantage of her opened mouth and moves her hand from her boob to her mouth. Meredith sucks on her fingers with desperation as she feels another orgasm coming. Addison sticks another finger in which causes Meredith's hips to buckle. The position they're in makes it easier for Addison's long fingers to reach deeper inside Meredith. Addison leans forward a bit which makes her fingers slide in deeper as Meredith screams out for her. That's when she knows she found her g-spot. She pumps faster as she circles her clit with her thumb. Meredith feels her legs about to give out due to the pleasure she's feeling. She still has her hands on the back of Addison's neck and moves one hand to grab her lower back so she can maintain some balance. 

"ADDISON!"

Addison slides her fingers out as she feels her fluids come dripping out. She lets her go and then walks under the water. Meredith grabs the shampoo and starts to wash Addison's hair. They continue to bathe each other and steal a few kisses here and there. Addison reaches the lever and turns off the water. They giggle as they get out of the shower. Addison grabs her robe and hands another one to Meredith so she can cover up. They walk back into the room and Meredith sits on Addison's vanity. Addison goes over to the rooms phone and calls room service to bring up wine and some snack to accompany the wine.

"Oooh. I want some wine."

"It'll be here soon." Says Addison as she walks right behind Meredith. She leans over and grabs a brush. She starts to brush Meredith's hair as she closes her eyes and hums to every stroke. Addison looks at Meredith through her mirror and enjoys her view. She thinks of how she wants to keep going all night with the sexy attending.


	20. Seattle Day 2 / Attending Pt. 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Meredith gets the best orgasm of her life.

Both women are naked laying on their sides facing each other on the bed. Between them is wooden cutting board of a mix of cheese and crackers also a vine of grapes. They give each other little seductive smirks as they eat their after sex snacks while drinking red wine. Addison drinks from her wine glass and some runs down her mouth. Meredith leans in and sucks the fallen wine off the edge of her lips. She leans back and lays on her stomach while on her forearms so she can still be level with Addison. 

"You're so fucking gorgeous." Says Meredith.

"And you're breathtakingly beautiful." Replies Addison. 

Meredith smiles as she watches Addison grab a vine of grapes. She leans back on her elbow as she raises her other hand to lower the grapes into her mouth slowly. Meredith just admires her smooth curves, her soft neck, and those gorgeous breasts out in total light. Her long delicious legs are crossed but she can see the toned line and she just wants to bite them. Her face is so beautiful even without makeup. She just thinks about how she's the most stunning woman she's been with. She's also breathtaking in bed. She doesn't want to let her go again this time. But just watching Addison seductively eat grapes and drink wine makes her wet again and ready for round two. 

"You admiring the view Grey?"

Meredith bites her lip as her response. She moves her hand out from under her and gently strokes Addison's lower abdomen to the center of her chest. She then walks her fingers up her neck to her soft red lips. Addison places the empty vine on the cutting board and turns to face Meredith. She leans on her elbows and arches her head back a bit. She faces the ceiling and closes her eyes as Meredith slides her index finger into her mouth. She starts to tug her finger and stroke the side with her tongue. Feeling Addison suck her makes her start to drip from the seduction. She pulls her finger out and trails it around her jawline. Addison sits up and gets off the bed. She turns head a little and tilts her hips as she walks into the bathroom. 

Meredith feels so wet for her. She gets off the bed and places the cutting board on the table. She pulls the cover out and shakes off the crumbs. She puts the cover back on as she hears the sink turn on. She gets on the edge of the bed. She sits facing the door and places her feet on the bed as her legs are fully spread out to show Addison the view. She has her hands behind her on the covers to make her chest pop out a bit so Addison can see her in her full glory.

"Mmmmmm." Moans Addison as she opens the door to see Meredith spread out for her. Meredith's soft plump breasts are just staring at her. Her core is dripping wet and by seeing that she gets thirsty. Meredith's smirk sets her over edge and she licks her lips before going over to kiss her. Her lips part instantly to allow Addison to move her tongue inside. Addison grabs her by the waist as Meredith wraps her hands around her neck. They kiss like this for a few minutes before Addison pushes her into the bed. Meredith loves the force Addison exerts and that makes her start to drip even more. 

Addison instead of getting on top of her goes over to her suitcase. She pulls out a black sleeping mask and walks over to Meredith's side. She puts the mask on the blonde and walks away. She couldn't bring her rope from home because that would have raised questions with Jake. She went to the sex shop earlier and bought soft black rope. She tied it to the middle of the bed frame. Meredith could hear noises but she didn't know what Addison was doing. She felt her grab her wrists and pull them back over her head. She started getting Deja Vu back to familiar times. Addison ties her wrists tight but not to stiff she she can have some movement. 

Addison leaves Meredith for a few seconds while she goes into the restroom. She grabs an unused hand towel and walks back. She places the towel under Meredith's thighs and ass. While she was in the sex shop she also bought a mini pink vibrator. She wants to make Meredith squirt tonight. She's never seen her do that before. She hopes this will be her first time as well. She remembers that she's squirted about four times with Mark. He used a toy twice, his dick once, and god knows how but he used his fingers and tongue once. That was her best orgasm to date. 

Before she uses the vibrator she wants to try herself first and she if she can make her squirt. She places the vibrator down and grabs a water bottle. Meredith starts to tug on the rope since she hasn't felt Addison's touch yet. The waiting has made her grow like a waterfall. Addison forcefully opens her legs wider and just sees the dripping puddle. She bends down on one knee and moves her face over her center. Meredith moans as she feels Addison's breath on her core. She can almost feel her touch but the anticipation makes her desperate as she pulls on the rope harder. She wants to open her eyes and see what's taking so long. The desperation is killing her. 

Addison pulls in closer and moves her head down at the bottom of her opening. She slowly glides her tongue from the bottom all the way to the top of her clit.

"Oh, Addison!"

She took in a mouthful of her wetness and swallowed it. Meredith hears her gulp and moans at that. Addison comes back down and kisses her folds as if she were kissing her lips. She tilts her head and slides her tongue around. She even gently pulls one of her folds with her teeth. Meredith starts to develop ragged breathing as Addison makes out with her lower lips. Addison moves back and leaves Meredith with the near finish as she sighs. She opens her water bottle and moves it directly above Meredith's center. She slowly tilts it and lets a few droplets land on her clit and folds. Meredith gives out sharp breaths at the sensation of water falling on her. Addison moves the water bottle a little forward and spills water above her clit. This time she lets a little stream fall on her. The water glides through her slit down to her opening. Meredith pulls really hard on the rope and feels rope burns start to develop.

Addison closes the water bottle and places it on the floor near the edge of the bed. Addison drifts her fingertips along Meredith's opening. 

"Addison." Sighs out Meredith in desperation.

Addison gently rubs circles around her clit as she leans back into her core. With her other fingers she widens her opening so she can stick her tongue inside her. She rolls her tongue and moves it inside Meredith. She moans loudly at the sensation of her tongue. Addison tries to widen her opening more and pushes her face as deep inside her as she can. Meredith yells as she arches her back. She sucks and slips her tongue in and out. Meredith says she's about to come. She continues to circle her clit and slowly inserts her fingers that were opening her. With one push inside, Meredith comes. 

"Addison!" 

Addison is so wet at the show Meredith has going on. Since Meredith already came she should slow down but instead she changes her pace and goes faster. She circles her slit faster and pulls out her fingers. She then she inserts her middle and ring finger inside Meredith. They go in swiftly and Addison moves her fingers in a U motion. Meredith moans deeply at that motion. Addison continues with both her hands and slowly gets up while not moving her hands off her. She bends over Meredith and gets on top of her with her legs spread while she maintains her posture on her knees. Now her hands are directly under her and she has a better visualization of Meredith. Meredith starts to call out for Addison as she comes for the second time. 

Addison feels her juices run down her fingers and it's a lot but it's not her max yet. She continues to move her fingers inside her but this time adding an in and out motion to her U. She stops rubbing circles on her clit and just goes up and down at a rapid pace. The forearm of her hand inside Meredith is resting on her center. Addison starts to rock her hips forward causing her complete arm to move forward with her. That makes the fingers inside Meredith go in deeper as Meredith shrieks at that feeling. Addison found her sweet spot again. She starts to rock her hips faster and Meredith pulls on the rope more. Meredith arches her back really far and tells Addison she is going to come. The buildup makes Meredith start to pant and moan consistently. Addison pushes her hips very far as her hand goes in super deep while her other fingers are moving so fast above her clit. 

"ADDISON!" Screams Meredith intensely as she moves head forward and her face is completely red. 

Addison feels her juices start to drip out over her hand. This time it feels more liquidy and she knows Meredith is squirting. She continues to rub on the clit as she slides out her fingers. As she pulls her fingers out, Meredith juices run out of her opening. It was like she broke a dam of white fluids. Meredith continues to moan and yell for Addison's name and slowly dies down as Addison milks the orgasm to its end. She just made Meredith squirt without the use of her new vibrator. She stops rubbing her slit and reaches for Meredith's mask. She slides it off her head so she can face Addison. 

"Holy Fuck!" Says Meredith as she tries to catch her breath. 

Addison gets off her knees over Meredith and walks back to Meredith's edge of the bed. She loosens the rope and lets Meredith have her hands back. She walks to the other edge and kneels in front of Meredith's silky core. Addison starts to take in her fluids as they smear across her mouth. Meredith moans as Addison drinks her grand finish. Addison looks up at Meredith and wipes off the residue with her arm. She comes back over her and kisses her. Meredith pulls her in as closely as she can. They kiss passionately as Meredith turns to face Addison better. She kicks the towel to the floor since Addison cleaned the mess that didn't fall on it. They intertwine their legs as Addison holds the small of her back with one hand. Meredith cups the side of her face as the other hand rests on her hip. Addison's other hand is resting in the center of Meredith's chest as the continue to kiss until they come up for air. They stay in each others body as they just lay in sweet silence.

"That was the best orgasm I've ever had Addison. I'm glad to see you haven't forgotten your skills."

"I was hoping you'd say that. You were a decadent dessert to top the night." 

Meredith fits her head between the crook of Addison's neck and shoulder. They take a small nap after that mindblowing orgasm Addison gave Meredith. Addison loves this peacefulness and just wants to whisper 'I love you' to Meredith but she can't. She hears her softly snoring and closes her eyes to sleep with her.


	21. Seattle Day 3 / Attending

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Addison thinks of the beach.

The sun is shining. Mmm the breeze coming in smells so good. Where is she though. That was one of the best nights I've had in a long time. I love her. Oh there she is. Looking at the view of the sunrise over the sea. The gold rays hit her face and her body as it just illuminates her beauty. How cute, she's wearing my robe. Oh now she's walking back to bed... oh well there goes my robe. That body of hers especially in the morning drives me crazy. 

"Hey."

"Hey sunshine."

"You looked so peaceful sleeping that I didn't want to wake you."

"Well at least I woke up to an amazing view."

Mmmm. Her lips are so delicate. I love just having her. I'm so lazy to move so I just let her lead the kissing. Mmmmm. I feel her fingers slowly slip inside me. Morning sex is the best with her. 

"I love you, Addison."

"I love you, too."

***********

Addison opens her eyes and wakes up at the feeling of Meredith's fingers inside her. She moans into Meredith's lips. She's still in a haze because she felt that her dream was so real that she doesn't know if she did say anything out loud. Meredith starts to rub circles on her clit as she starts to wiggle her fingers inside her faster. Addison cups her cheeks and moves her tongue in her mouth as she moans. Meredith pushes her fingers deep inside her as she arches her back at that sensation. All her fuzziness went away and she's fully awake and starved for sex.

"Mmmmm. I'm clo-"

Meredith bites her bottom lip to keep Addison quiet. She starts going rapidly as she feels Addison's walls start to clench on her fingers. Addison stops kissing her and tilts her head back while she climaxes. Meredith keeps moving her fingers as she kisses the length of Addison's neck as she feels the vibrations of her moans. Her juices starts to come out and get all over her fingers. She pulls them out and starts to suck on her finish. Meredith then kisses Addison on the lips. They stay side by side for a little longer until Meredith starts to snake down her body. Addison pulls her upper leg over Meredith's face to let her eat her out on their sides. Meredith licks and takes in as much of Addison as she can. Addison moans at the touch of her tongue on her core. She holds on to Meredith's head as she continues to clean her up. 

After Meredith finishes cleaning her, she starts to kiss her lower lips with compassion. She thought of Addison's upper lips as she makes out with her folds. Addison loves when she does that. She imagines the way they kiss normally but just happening downstairs. Meredith finishes as she leaves a small little peck right on her clit as she moves Addison's leg down. She comes back up to lay next to her. 

"What time is it?" Asks Addison.

"It is about three am." Says Meredith.

"Oh, I thought it was later than that."

"Addison?" Says Meredith trying to get Addison to focus on her specifically. Looking into those beautiful eyes and wanting to stare at them forever. 

"Yes, Meredith?"

"Do you, actually love me back as you said. Or was that you sleep talking?"

Addison just has a blank face on. She doesn't know how to respond. She knows she does love Jake but the idea of loving Meredith more makes her feel like the adulterous bitch Derek called. She looks at Meredith's eyes of despair and opens her mouth to say something but nothing comes out. She quickly sits up on the side of the bed and looks down at the dark floor. 

"I think it's best of you leave before it gets suspicious that you aren't home yet." Says Addison in a monotone voice. 

Meredith starts to feel angry yet sad that Addison couldn't tell her the truth. She doesn't know if she's more mad at the fact that she kicked her out or that she loves her enough to fall back into her arms every time they see each other. She gets out of the bed and grabs her clothes. She puts them on in a hurry, gets her stuff, and slams the door shut on her way out. Meredith gets on the elevator and looks at the ceiling to not let her tears fall off her eyes.

Addison continues to look at the floor as tears start falling from her eyes. She does love her but what about her family. She's worked so hard to find the perfect man and settle down. She's happy and lives the life she's always wanted. She's just being greedy in wanting more. That all goes through her head but then she wonders if she found the perfect woman as well. She ponders at the idea the maybe the perfect woman might be what her heart desires. Addison gets up from the bed and walks into the bathroom. She turns on the lights and goes over to the sink. She turns on the faucet and splashes water on her face. She wipes her tears away and looks at herself in the mirror. She thinks about the view of the beach from her house. She envisions Jake and Henry next to her and she relaxes herself. She walks out and turns the light off. She slips on soft underwear and puts on her set of pink silk pajamas. She goes back to bed and tries to fall asleep. She still has hours until she has to actually get up.


	22. Seattle Day 3 / Attending Pt. 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Amelia remembers something.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There is a part where Mark and Addison had sex while she was still married to Derek. If you do not like heterosexual relations then I suggest you skip that part. You'll know when you get to that flashback.

Amelia is still awake at home watching TV. She couldn't sleep because she had a rough day at the hospital. She checks the clock repeatedly and no signs of Meredith just yet. Maggie just came home a couple of minutes ago. Amelia asked her if she saw Meredith at the hospital but she said that she wasn't there when she left the O.R. and assumed she was already home. Amelia grows suspicious and starts to think that Meredith is not out working or doing anything good. 

The door opens and Meredith slams it closed as she's still furious about Addison telling her to go. She walks into the living room and gets surprised seeing Amelia still up. 

"What are you doing up so late?"

"What are you doing out so late?"

"Nothing that concerns you." Says Meredith in a bitchy tone. She doesn't want to explain herself to Amelia and she's certainly not in the mood to discuss anything. She ignores her and walks into the kitchen. She doesn't realize Amelia follows her until she stands in front of the fridge to block her.

"Maggie came home a while ago and said you weren't even at the hospital when she got out of surgery. It's about to be four o'clock Mer. What were you doing?" Asks Amelia concerned and annoyed. 

"Like I said, nothing that concerns you." Meredith says with an angry tone and turns around to go up the stairs. "You should get some sleep. It's late." 

Amelia stays in the kitchen watching Meredith go upstairs. She feels angry at Meredith. She also thinks she was out with Addison but she doesn't want to imagine anything else. She doesn't want to think of Addie back on her old ways again and certainly not with Meredith. She doesn't know why it bothers her so much, but the idea of her sisters in laws together doesn't make sense. She walks away back into to the living room. She still can't sleep and watches more TV. 

**********

Addison is sitting on the Attending's lounge sofa on the phone with Jake. 

"Yeah it's going so well here. I miss you so much and tell Henry that too... (Yawns)... Yeah, I didn't get much sleep last night... Haha very funny, but no I just had trouble sleeping... okay, I love you too. Bye."

Amelia heard that part of Addison's call as she walked into the room. "What kept you from sleeping last night?"

"Hm? Oh nothing. I just had trouble sleeping. I couldn't fall asleep."

Amelia doesn't say anything as she stirs the sugar in her cup of coffee. She looks at Addison as she takes a sip. "Yeah sure, okay." Amelia then walks away and leaves the room.

Addison looks surprised and thinks that maybe Meredith went back and told Amelia everything. She starts to feel paranoid. Maybe Jake wasn't joking when he asked her if sex was keeping her from sleeping. 'What does Amelia know?' Goes through Addison's mind all day. She keeps looking for Meredith but she must be avoiding her. 

********

Meredith is talking with her intern over the chart of her post-op patient. She tells her to watch her and check her vitals every thirty minutes and in case something changes to page her immediately. She then looks up and sees Addison walking towards her. She can't look at her right now so she starts to walk away. There's no elevator in sight so she goes into the staircase. She starts to walks down at a fast pace.

×××××

Addison just finished talking with Bailey over a patient that just delivered twins. She was on the surgical floor because she was checking in with the patient that needs two more surgeries this week. The patient that she's in Seattle for. And across the hall is Meredith looking so hot in her attending scrubs. She just stares at her and catches Meredith's eyes. She starts to walk to her. She needs to talk to her. Meredith looks away and starts going away. She picks up her pace to reach Meredith and she sees her go into the staircase. She opens the door and looks around and hears her footsteps going down. She starts to go down the steps fast as she calls Meredith's name. 

××××××

Amelia just finished a successful aneurysm clipping. Today she feels like taking the stairs. She opens the door and hears someone familiar calling Meredith. She hears the footsteps coming down near her level. Amelia stands near the wall to hear this conversation. And she realizes the familiar voice is Addison. What would she be possibly calling Meredith for. She starts to get suspicious and keeps quiet to hear where this is going. 

********

"Meredith! Stop!" Yells Addison as she grabs Meredith's arm to stop her from running away. Meredith shoves her hand out of her grip and stares at Addison with anger. 

"What?!" Says Meredith enraged. 

"Look I'm sorry for last night. I didn't want to hurt y-"

"Hurt me?! I know you love me, you always have but you're to scared to admit that to yourself. But you know what, forget it. Go. Leave and forget me like you always do."

"Meredith! I'm married. What do you want me to say. I already broke my vows with you. Not just once either. That's irreparable damage to a marriage, I should know. I just can't accept what this is. I have a family and a life I'm proud of. You don't think this is hard for me? What do you want me to do? Leave him and come back to Seattle? I have a kid, Meredith. You also have three kids. What do you want?"

"Oh so now you play your marriage and family card? What about last night? Or the day before that? What about the moment you didn't leave my house after dinner. In case you were wondering that was all you wasn't it?"

"Really? All me? Yeah alright. You know what Meredith, whatever you think this is, is over. I do have a happy family that I'm not about to destroy with an indecisive person. And keep your mouth shut. Because whatever you told Amelia better not be to get back at me."

"Amelia? I never told her anything. What are you even talking about? Did you tell her something?"

"She heard me on the phone with Jake this morning. She implied that she knew why I couldn't sleep last night. I assumed you told her since you were angry at me because I couldn't tell you that I loved you back."

"For the record I told her nothing. And I take back those words. You aren't someone worth loving." Says Meredith furiously as she turns around and takes a step down. 

"What do you want from me Meredith?!" 

Both women gasp as they see Amelia come out the side facing them on the steps. Meredith looks at her and feels the disappointment from her. Addison looks at her and remembers being in this situation again. 

"Addison? Meredith? Really? Again Addison?" Says Amelia with that sour tone. 

Meredith ignores Amelia and walks out toward the door. Amelia walks up a few steps to be near Addison. Addison looks at her speechless not knowing what to say to Amelia. They both remember what happened years ago...

********

"Mark... faster... harder... Mmmm, Mark!" Moans out Addison. 

Mark is on top of Addison on his knees as he's holding Addison's legs up as he thrusts himself inside her. Addison is laying completely flat on her back completely bare with Mark fucking her on her bed that she shares with Derek at her mother-in-law's home. Mark and Addison thought they were alone since Derek went fishing with his mom and his sisters went out to buy food for their dinner tonight. No one told them that Amelia was downstairs. 

Addison continues to clench on to the covers as she nears her finish. Mark starts to slow down the pace as he puts her legs down and gets in missionary position with her. Addison wraps her legs around his waist as she holds the back of his neck with one hand and digs her nails into his back with her other arm. Mark starts to pick up the pace as he kisses Addison's neck softly. Addison starts to moan louder and longer. 

Amelia was walking to her room when she started hearing noises from Derek's room. Derek was gone though so she thought it was weird. As she neared the door she heard Addison and it sounded like she was having sex but her brother wasn't home. She walks right next to the door and places her ear on the door. She can hear the bed move and hear Addison moaning. She places her hand on the doorknob and slowly opens the door a little, enough to peek inside without being noticed. She sees Addison with her eyes closed and her breasts completely out. Well that was a sight. But then she opens the door a little more and notices the dirty blonde hair by her neck and realizes it's not Derek but it's Mark. She accidentally gasps loudly as Addison turns her head to see Amelia just staring at her. 

"Mark! Stop!" Says Addison scared. 

Amelia runs away from the room and goes into her room. Mark pulls out of Addison confused.

"What?! What happened?"

"Amelia. She saw us. Get dressed. I'm going to go talk to her." Says Addison very shocked. They both get out of bed quickly and get dressed. Before Mark leaves the room Addison pulls him in for a kiss before he walks out. She thinks about what she's going to tell Amelia. She walks out and goes over to Amelia's room. She knocks before she opens the door.

"Amelia?" She says as she nears the bed where Amelia is facing the opposite direction. She sits on the edge of the bed and looks at Amelia with sadness. "Amelia?" 

"What?" Says Amelia angrily.

"Amelia please. Don't tell Derek please. I'll tell him myself. But please don't tell him what you saw."

"Addison. You're asking me to lie to him. I love you Addie but why?"

"I-I don't know why it happened but please let me tell him." 

"Addison." Says Amelia with sadness over what she saw and with keeping her mouth shut. Addison reaches for her upper and hugs her. She whispers thank you and holds her for a few seconds. She stands up and looks at Amelia and says, "I'm sorry." As she walks out the door. 

Amelia never told Derek nor brought it up to Addison. But just a few months later she found out by overhearing a conversation that Derek left New York because he caught Addison with Mark. That infuriated her but she wondered what happened to Addison.

********* 

"Ame-"

"Really? Again?! Last time I found you and I lied for you. I kept it a secret yet you still continued to sleep with Mark. And now you're sleeping with Meredith Grey? Since when did you sleep with women? Wait that's not relevant. Since when did you start cheating on Jake?"

"Amelia. Please, don't tell Jake."

"You got some nerve asking me to cover for you again. Why would you do this. Again. What is it about you that you can't just stay in a committed relationship?"

"It's not Jake. What me and Meredith have has been going on long before Jake."

"So why marry Jake? When clearly you want to be with someone else. You know what forget it." Says Amelia as she pulls out her phone as she looks through her contacts.

Addison grabs her phone and grabs Amelia's wrist. "Amelia, please. I love Jake. I stopped talking with Meredith years ago. Me and Jake are in a good place. Just being back here has brought back some hidden feelings but they're done. I'm done. I don't want her. I want Jake. Amelia please. I love you. I wouldn't ask this of you again if I didn't mean it. Let me be the one to break the news to him. Please."

Amelia pulls her wrist out of Addison's grip and swipes her phone back. She looks at Addison with those same eyes as she looked at her when she caught her with Mark. "I won't say anything, Addie. But please make up your mind." She says as she steps down the stairs and goes for the door. 

Addison stands there and puts her hands over her head thinking about what just happened. She wants to go find Meredith but then she wants to call Jake and explain. She told Amelia she was going to talk to him but she can't even think about telling Jake about her affair. She wouldn't be capable of lying to him. She just thinks that she'll leave this here and hopes that Amelia never brings it up. 

Amelia stands outside against the wall next to the staircase door. She rests her head back and closes her eyes. She thinks about Meredith with Addison. She wonders how long Addison meant that they had something going on. She pulls out her phone and looks for Jake's contact information. She starts to type a message and hits send. She puts her phone back in her pocket and walks away.


	23. Seattle Day 3 / Attending Pt. 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Addison is surprised about Jake.

It was a long day at the hospital. Addison didn't get out until 9pm. She's exhausted and since Amelia knows, she feels as like the guilt is eating her. She would have felt no guilt if no one but Meredith knew. It would have been easier to forget and pretend like nothing existed if no one reminded you of your mistakes. But Addison was unlucky in that sense. That's the second time Amelia finds out about her affairs. At least she didn't see her naked this time. 

Addison arrives at The Archfield ready to pass out. She walks towards to the elevator and a desk attendant stops her before she gets on. 

"Mrs. Montgomery-Reilly?"

"Yes?"

"Sorry to inconvenience you. Your room has been switched. Here's the key card. Your new room is 2502. Have a nice night!" Says the attendant as she walks away.

Addison is so confused on who would switch her room. She thought it might have been Meredith but then she thinks this might have been Amelia's doing so Meredith wouldn't come see her. She ponders so many conclusions as to why her room was switched as the elevator stops on the 25th floor. As the doors open she realizes there's only about 5 rooms on this floor. She slides her card and opens the door slowly.

"Hello?"

"Mommy!!"

"Henry!" 

Henry ran to Addison as she walked in the door. She hugs him and kisses him on the cheek. "What are you doing here? Where's daddy?" Asks Addison to her 8 year old son. She walks into the living room area of the place and sees Jake sitting on the couch with a neutral face. It worries her. She thinks Amelia told him about Meredith.

"Hey honey why don't you go play with your toys or use your iPad. I need to talk to Daddy." Tells Addison to Henry as he goes into one room and closes the door. She walks up to Jake and sits on the armchair across from him with a shocked expression in her face. 

"Jake, what are you doing here?"

"Why don't you tell me?"

"What do you mean? What are you even talking about?"

"Amelia texted me this morning."

"Really? What did she say?"

"Addison you should have told me."

"Jake, I-I can explain."

"She told me you were having your panic attacks again. She told me that she was worried for you. She said this place brought out too many bad memories and how I should come to help you. Baby, I love you. You told me you'd be fine before you left but I shouldn't have let you come by yourself. But as soon as she told me that I picked up Henry from school and got on the fastest plane to Seattle. I'm here now."

Addison lets a sigh of relief. She really thought Amelia told her about Meredith. She's actually glad that Amelia told Jake to come. Now she can focus on her family and leave her chains behind. She looks up to Jake and says, "I'm sorry honey. I thought I was strong enough to not fall back again but I just couldn't. This place makes me remember things I thought I left behind. I'm so sorry. I fell back into..." She starts crying and everything she said was about Meredith but Jake didn't catch on to that and assumed it was her panic attacks. He walked over to her and knelt beside her holding her in his arms. Addison latched on to his shirt and cried into his shoulder. She was crying because she wanted Meredith. Jake stroked her hair and held her safe. 

The hotel room was more of an apartment. It had a kitchen, master bedroom, guest room, two full bathrooms, and a nice living room with a balcony. She's glad Jake came but she also feels a burden of not being able to tell him what's hurting her. They're both laying in bed as Jake is spooning Addison. He fell asleep about an hour ago and Addison put Henry to bed long before that. She couldn't sleep though. All she thought about was Meredith. On how she hurt her with her words and how she left without looking back. When she told her that she's not worth loving, it broke her heart. Surely she didn't mean it literally but she meant it to hurt her. She closes her eyes and just thinks about the hour they spent in each others arms just admiring each others anatomy in ways no one else has. That was love but Addison is too proud to admit her love for Meredith. 

*********

Meredith finished putting her kids to bed. She walks downstairs into the kitchen and just sees Amelia waiting for her. She purposely avoided her all day and forgot that she has to come home to her. She goes over to the cabinet and pulls out a bottle of wine. She's going to need it. She pours herself a full glass of wine while Amelia is staring her down. She can feel the anger radiating from her body and she continues to ignore her and take a sip of her wine. She puts down her glass and turns around to face the sink and grabs the edge.

"What Amelia."

"I need you to explain this to me."

"What. That I hooked up with Addison or do you need details on how that went."

"We both know it was more than a hook up."

"Sorry to break it to you, but it wasn't. You heard her didn't you." She says as she turns around and leans against the sink counter. She crosses her arms and looks into Amelia's eyes with annoyance. 

"She's married Meredith. She has a kid she fought hard for and a man that loves her to the moon and back. Why would you want to mess that up for her, again. Addie is like a sister to me. Actually cross that. She's a way better sister than the ones I have, including you."

"Well that settles who's your favorite sister. Good to know." Says Meredith as she grabs her wine glass and goes into the hall. She starts going up the stairs. 

"In case you get any ideas to go see her again just know her room isn't the same one. I texted Jake, her husband. He came with their son not too long ago. She's with her family. Her real family." 

Meredith continues walking up the stairs but with tears forming in her eyes. She goes down the hall and shuts the door behind her. She braces her back against the door and slides down to the floor. She's in her room. Alone. With a half empty glass of wine. Crying. Thinking about the woman she loves being with the family she loves more than her. Meredith breaks down silently at the thought of Addison happy without her. She can't help she fell in love with her, but has she already forgotten her. 

Meredith finishes her wine and places the glass on her drawer cabinet as she tries to stand up. She's a little woozy and walks over to her bed. She pulls the covers over herself while fully clothed. At this point she cared very little and just wanted to forget about her in her dreams. She then falls asleep and her mind drifts off as she thinks of Addison.


	24. Seattle Day 4 / Attending

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Jake knows something's up.

It's around 5:30am and Addison barely slept. She gets out of bed slowly and goes into the connecting bathroom. She turns on the lights and goes over to the sink and brushes her teeth. She looks at herself in the mirror. She thinks about how she's not as resilient as she was when she was younger. She starts to notice every little imperfection about herself and looks down as she's holding on to the sink. She walks over to the walk-in shower and slips out of her pajamas. She turns on the water and sets the heat high enough that the mirrors start to fog. She walks inside and lets the hot water hit her face and body. The heat allows her to relax and lose the tension she has in her muscles. She couldn't sleep and feels like everything is about fall down since Jake showed up. 

As she's scrubbing her legs she feels Jake's hands on her hips from behind. Addison doesn't feel like having sex with him today or in Seattle. She only has sex with Meredith in Seattle, but having it with Jake would prove to her that Meredith means nothing to her. Addison stands straight up and lets water fall on her as Jake is caressing her naked body as he holds her in his arms. She closes her eyes and tries to imagine about being in Meredith's arms but his body is male because she starts to feel his hardness on her ass. Jake turns her around and starts kissing her. They lean into the wall and they continue to kiss. Jake keeps trying to budge open her mouth so he can slide his tongue in but Addison just feels so dull. She decides she can't do this, not right now. She shoves Jake off of her and walks out the shower. She reaches a towel and wraps herself in it. She goes back into the bedroom and looks for her clothes. 

Jake walks out with a towel around his hips. He sits on the edge of the bed knowing something is wrong. Addison is sitting at the full vanity in the corner of the room. She's dressed in a simple black dress and is applying her makeup. Jake watches her get ready and she knows he wants to talk. She pretends to not know and continues with her looks. 

"Addison."

"Hmm?" She makes out as she applies her red lipstick.

"What's going on."

"What are you talking about?" Addison says as she turns around on her seat to face Jake. 

"You love shower sex. Something seems off."

"Nothing is off. I just didn't feel like it this morning. I'm just tired."

"We fell asleep pretty early. I thought this would have energized you today."

"I had a long day yesterday. I did sleep but I'm still tired. It's okay though. I'm fine. We're fine." She says as she turns back around and starts to comb through her hair.

"Something is on your mind Addison. I know how you act when something is bothering you."

"Nothing is bothering me Jake. If anything, I'm happy that you're here with Henry." That was a straight up lie. She was mad that he's here. 

Jake stands up and gets dressed in comfortable clothes. Addison dries then curls her hair to get ready for the day. Jake went out to the kitchen that came with a full pantry. He cooks some pancakes while she's still in the room. Addison looks at herself all ready for the day. She feels good about the way she looks but Meredith doesn't stop circling her thoughts. She grabs her purse and walks out to the living room area. She sits on the counter table stool as Jake places a plate of pancakes in front of her. Henry then comes out at the smell of pancakes. He's still a little woozy and sits next to his mom. Jake already set up his plate then grabs the coffee pot and pours coffee for himself and Addison. He grabs his plate and sits next to Henry as they all eat breakfast in silence. Everyone of them are just silent eating pancakes. Addison thinking about Meredith, Jake thinking about Addison, and Henry thinking about his pancakes. 

"Mmm. Thanks honey for the breakfast." Says Addison as she finished her plate and grabs her purse. She goes over to Jake and kisses his cheek then turns and kisses Henry in the forehead. She walks to the door and says "I love you, my loves." She feels like Jake is going to crack what's happening and Amelia is going to help him. She feels that's the reason she told Jake to come up here. She he can figure it out for himself. Then she just feels like her world is about to come crashing down. This was their first silent breakfast. Usually they talk about what Henry is thinking or about the practice. On quiet days they still talk but not as much because it either means they're tired or maybe in a little fight. But today it was completely silent which has never happened. Even Henry was quiet. He usually speaks the most but maybe with the plane ride and being in a different state made him even more tired. Addison knows something is going to happen soon and she doesn't know if she wants to stop it. 

She took a taxi to work today. It's barely 7:30am and her second big surgery in her triple series is today but not until later in the day. She likes to come early to check on her post-op's and maybe get a delivery in. As the taxi pulls up to the side of the hospital she sees Meredith walking with Maggie and Amelia. She waits a few seconds then gets out when she saw them go into the alleyway. She walks on the sidewalk and stops at the coffee cart to get an americano to keep her up. When she grabs her order she feels someone back into her. 

"Oh I'm so sor-" 

Meredith looks at her and stops herself before she says sorry. She doesn't want to apologize to Addison for anything. She grabs a few packs of sugar and walks away. Addison follows her inside the hospital. They end up in the Attending's lounge and luckily no one is in there. Addison closes and locks the door so no one can bother them. Meredith drinks her coffee and sits at the table. Addison sets her coffee down and opens the cabinet. She puts her bag inside and pulls out her doctors coat. She closes the cabinet door, turns around, and sits across from Meredith. They take sips of coffee while looking into each other's eyes. They both think about the other one naked and about how much they love them. Addison puts her coffee down and places her right hand in the center of the table. Meredith puts her coffee down and grabs Addison's hand. This moment is all Addison needs. Her energy for the day is in that simple moment. She thought Meredith would be mad at her. Or ignore her. Or even slap her for following her. This all seems unlikely for her but then the ball drops. Meredith slides her hand back and looks directly into Addison's eyes. 

"Addison."

Silence.

"I love you. I love you more than any man I've been with. I may even love you more than Derek. But I want you. I love and want you and I want you to feel the same. Yet you can't tell me or cut me out. You continue this and leave me out to dry. You hurt me. But somehow we managed to comeback to a full circle."

Silence.

"What could I expect from someone like you. You aren't someone worth loving." Says Meredith while she stands up. She throws her coffee cup into the trash and goes into the restroom. Addison just sits there flown into space. She imagines what it would be like to end her days with Meredith. How would that even work out. She wouldn't want to move back here and Meredith wouldn't want to leave. She couldn't be apart from Henry because she fought for him for herself. Then there's Jake, the man who put her back into pieces that were broken throughout the years. He helped put her back together and love her for every bit of crazy she has. What would she be throwing this all away for. Yet Meredith hasn't left her mind or heart. She doesn't think she'll be able to leave the same way as she came here. This time is different then all the other times. Not because of the sex or place but because this time she's so deep in love. She can't bury her love for Meredith any longer. 

Addison stands up and goes to the door of the restroom and tries to open it. It's locked so Addison just stands in front of the door and places her hand on the door. She leans in and tries to hear what Meredith is doing but it's silent. Meredith is on the other side of the door leaning against the frame with the side of her body. Tears are running down her cheeks. Both women are so close to each other with only a piece of wood separating them. Both of them feel their energy through the door and just stand there in total silence. Addison moves her face closer to the door, enough to say something Meredith can hear.

"Meredith." She says lightly. Meredith doesn't respond but can hear her words as if she were whispering them into her ear. 

"Meredith." 

Silence.

"Meredith. I do love you."

Silence.

"I love you so much that I'm afraid of it." 

Silence.

"I'm afraid to love you Meredith."

Silence.

Addison walks forward toward the table and picks up her coffee. She unlocks the door and walks away. She checks her phone and it's only 8am. Today is going to be a long day for both of them.


	25. Seattle Day 4 / Attending Pt. 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which a chapel is a place of peace.

Meredith is standing in front of the sink just thinking about what Addison just told her. She finally accepted it but what does it mean. She heard Addison leave the lounge and heard other doctors come in. She left the restroom and headed for the hall. She got a sudden urge to find Addison and kiss her but right now she has a surgery. She made it up to the O.R. floor when she saw Addison going in to O.R. three. She just stood there watching her in action then walked into O.R. one for her simple appendectomy. Addison was in the other operating room performing a c-section on one of her patients. 

The time on the clock ticks and soon it's noon. Addison has an hour before her big surgery today and she walks down to the cafeteria. She realizes she's not hungry, all day she's just been thinking about how she told Meredith that she's afraid to love her. Maybe it was a mistake but she knows she meant it. Not long after, Addison finds herself out by the chapel in the hospital. It's under renovations so the door is blocked off with plastic. Addison doesn't care and opens the doors to take a peek inside. There's no one and everything is almost done. The only thing left to do is the walls. She walks in and sits in the third row from the front. Addison doesn't pray but she does feel some sort of serenity inside. She closes her eyes and what pops in her mind is the dream she had of Meredith with her in L.A. Addison grabs her phone and pages Meredith here. 

Meredith is walking down the hall of the surgical floor. She just finished checking in with her appy patient and she looks at her buzzing phone. It's Addison and she wants her to come to the chapel. Meredith still doesn't know how to feel. I mean she's wanted Addison to confess her feelings but she didn't think about how she would handle things. Their lives are pretty messy and all of this just adds more to it. Not long after she's opening the plastic wrapped door and strides in. Addison doesn't turn around but just waits for her to come sit next to her. Meredith come up right next to her and sits down. 

Meredith puts her feet above the front seat and leans back. Addison is sitting with her legs crossed while looking up to the ceiling with her eyes closed. For a small moment they live in this quiet world where they only exist. Addison puts her hand next to her hip on the empty space between them. Meredith holds her hand and closes her eyes. She leans her head on Addison's shoulder and they stay like this. Addison rests her head on Meredith and just wishes she can turn back the clock to their first night. She wouldn't be in this situation if she simply stopped herself from trying to escape her crappy life. 

Meredith slowly pulls her head back a bit and looks at Addison. They've been sharing extensive amounts of eye glares and hand holding just in this particular day. Was it the fact Addison finally told her she loved her out loud or the fact that they were caught and that made their relationship real now and not secret and imaginary to others. Something just felt different between them today and none of them could place their finger on it. Addison leans her head down and both women just let their foreheads rests on each other. Meredith can hear Addison's breath speed up. Addison can see Meredith's heart beat faster. Their lips are so close that they're sharing the same air particles. They continue in the frozen moment while still holding hands. Addison then cups Meredith's cheek with her free hand. 

The tips of their noses are on each other and they still continue their close position. Addison's lips are slightly parted and Meredith trails her lips with her index finger. They haven't kissed literally yet but they've had sex in their minds. All Addison wants to do is take her here right now but Jake is the force that stops her from taking this further. Meredith wants to love Addison in this bench but she doesn't. Something inside her just tells her to not change a thing that's happening. Meredith pulls back from this loving space in time. She stands up and places her hand out for Addison. Addison grabs her hand and stands up with her. Meredith leads them to the back of the chapel into a room Addison never knew existed. It was an empty office most likely for whatever minister would work in the chapel. Addison didn't want to stop but soon she would have to make her way up to the O.R. so she can't really start anything. 

Meredith went to sit on the desk and Addison sat on the office chair. They were directly in front of each other living in this silence. Meredith gets off the desk and gets on top of Addison. Her legs are spread apart on top of her while she just sits on her lap. Addison pulls her in closer and strokes her back. Meredith finds the crook of her neck to rest her head. She enjoys the pleasure from Addison's delicate touch.

Addison gets paged in between their soft cuddles. Meredith steps off from Addison and lets her go. They haven't said a word but just nod their heads in mutual agreement. Now Meredith is alone in this empty office. She sits on the chair just picturing something to win over Addison. 

Meredith is in the elevator next to a tall slim man she hasn't seen before. Next thing you know he introduces himself. 

"Hi, I'm Jake Reilly. Double board certified surgeon in obstetrics and general. I'm also a fertility specialist. And you are?"

Meredith comes back to her actual reality. Next to Addison's husband in an elevator. They're both on their way to see Addison in the gallery. Meredith shakes his hand and introduces herself. "Hi. I'm Meredith Grey. General Surgery."

"Oh I know you. You're Ellis Grey's daughter right? Addison has mentioned you before. Well I'm glad to be sharing this elevator ride with an incredible fellow surgeon."

Meredith smiles as her insides turn. They remain silent and walk towards the gallery. Addison walks in the O.R. and looks up and finds her husband sitting next to her mistress. 

'Oh Fuck'


	26. Seattle Day 4 / Attending Pt. 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Meredith lets go.

Addison Montgomery is not a person to panic. Yet she looks up to the gallery to see her husband and 'girlfriend?' engaging in a full conversation. Maybe Meredith does have it out for her since she might have been too late. No that can't be they barely had a nice moment not too long ago. Her mind is jumping to so many conclusions so instead she focuses on her surgery. She can't manage to concentrate and looks back up. Both Meredith and Jake look at her and smile. Something about Meredith's smile seems off to her. At least she's at ease because they both seemed happy so it's not bad.

*********

"So tell me. How did you manage to conquer the Addison Montgomery, world-class neonatal surgeon?" Asks Meredith to engage in conversation. 

"Ha, funny. Well honestly she conquered me." Jake says as he looks down at Addison and smiles. "Well we met at a supermarket and she asked me how to tell if a pineapple was ripe."

They both chuckle at Addison's pick up line. 

"She was in her yale hoodie, no makeup, and her hair in a bun. If I had known who she was at the time I wouldn't have known it was her. Then the next day we both went to the supermarket again but she was dressed up nicely in a gorgeous red dress, with her hair down, and nice makeup. We hit it off immediately without knowing our names or anything about each other. But from the moment we set eyes on each other, I knew she was different." He looks down and feels happy. 

Meredith looks at Jake trying not to change her face to highlight the fact she feels guilty and a tad bit jealous he's gotten to experience Addison the way she wanted. "Wow, it was so simple that you two got together. That must have been nice."

"Well... We didn't see each other for a while until she was in my office for a fertility treatment. She had her then boyfriend and didn't want me. Then I interviewed at her practice for the job but also to be there for her. I waited about a year for her. I stood my ground and I told her I could give her everything but she should be willing to accept it. She faught for Henry. She is so strong that it made me realize she's the woman I want to spend the rest of my life with. I proposed to her then we got married. Marriage isn't a walk in the park but I would do anything for that woman. I love her and everything about her."

"That was so, beautiful. She really deserves someone like you. She deserves her happy ending." Meredith felt remorseful while she said that but she did mean it. Addison deserves the world. She was standing in the way of her happy ending wanting her to blow it up. What would they even do if they did get together. Move? Raise each others children together? Marry each other? It seems too late for any of those options. Meredith looks down at Addison and they make eye contact. Meredith smiles at her but the smile was more of a guilty sad smile. 

"Jake. Cathrine Fox is throwing a foundation ball for doctors and many people. It's this Saturday. She doesn't leave until Monday. I'll get you two invitations. Take her out and enjoy her." 

"Wow that's really great. Thank you. I'll definitely take her. Thank you Meredith."

Meredith stands up and walks out of the gallery. What did she just do. She let the woman she loves stay in her relationship. There is no reason to fight for anything. If anything she fell for her when she shouldn't have. Would things have been different if she never came to her hotel that night? Meredith decided it's best to let her go. 

********

"Hey beautiful." Says Jake as he's leaning against the door of the Attending's lounge watching Addison grab her stuff. She smiles at him and walks over to hug him. 

"I'm sorry about earlier. I just. It's been. I-"

"Shh. It's okay. I'm here. I'm not going anywhere. I did want to ask you something."

Addison gets worried for this question and backs away from Jake's arms. She looks at him confused.

"There's a ball this Saturday. Meredith told me about it and is giving me an invitation for me and you. Would you like to be my date?"

Addison blanks for a minute before answering. She now knows why Meredith's smile was off. This is her way of letting her go. She won't accept this. Meredith isn't getting off the hook so easily. She comes back into reality and hugs Jake. She nods her head and Jake just holds her in her arms. 

"Hey I have to go check on my patient before we go. You could go get the rental car and pull over by the side." 

"Okay." Says Jake as he kisses her forehead and slowly let's her go. He strides out the room happily and leaves Addison. 

Addison needs to go find Meredith. It's been years since she's been around the hospital and she wouldn't have a clue to where Meredith would be. She pulls out her phone and texts her. 

'Where are you? I want to talk.'

'Helipad'

Well she responded quickly. Addison walks down the hall into the elevator. No one is with her and she makes her way up to the helipad. It's sprinkling outside and Meredith is standing by the edge with an umbrella overlooking Seattle. It's pretty chilly as well so Addison quickly walks over to Meredith to feel her heat. They both just take in the view in silence. Both women have been through so much in life. Meredith isn't the same intern Addison first met and Addison isn't the same woman from before. They've both grown and matured. Meredith has been through more and doesn't show her emotions out loud anymore. It honestly turns Addison on but it also means she can't read her anymore. Both of them have a neutral face but people always say they have a resting bitch face. 

"You know my nickname used to be medusa. I was known to be cold and heartless. For a time that did actually happen. After Derek's death all I could think about is wanting to be with him. I allowed myself to become like ice."

Addison looks at Meredith not knowing where she's taking this. She's a bit confused but it's Meredith. She'll make sense. 

"Jake is warm, loving, and everything someone would wish for. He's your happy ending. He's your Derek 2.0. Talking with him earlier made me realize everything that you have to lose. What would you throw away if you did something stupid. I'm maybe starting to realize why Amelia brought him here in the first place. Addison. You're scared. You should be. That man out there is everything you need. I'll limit my contact with you for the remainder of your stay and keep it professional." Meredith says that all in a serious tone. She looks at Addison's big eyes confused at her words. Meredith looks away and walks toward the elevator. She hits the lobby floor and Addison stands in the rain frozen in time. 

Addison is just shocked. All she wanted is to forget Meredith or deny everything. She honestly hoped to get outed by Amelia to let this baggage that's holding her down finally come out. Meredith just left her. She let her go. She should be happy but she can't. She is afraid to love Meredith but that doesn't mean she doesn't love her. The maturity it took for her to walk away makes this more unbearable for her. Addison just continues to look at the city then feels her phone buzz. 

Everything is like a blur. Addison is in the car with Jake and feels time just moving without her. It's late at night and she's tossing and turning. She feels so out of place. Her body is here in bed next to Jake. Her mind is lost in her memories of Meredith. She doesn't work tomorrow so she wont be able to see Meredith until Saturday at the hospital or at the ball. Something feels like it's been ripped off her body and her soul. She can't accept Meredith's decision but she can't do anything about it. Is she really ready to risk everything for something that isn't certain? Is she really ready to give Meredith her whole heart? Does Addison really love her enough to be with her no matter the consequences?


	27. Seattle Day 5 / Attending

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Addison spends time with her family.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry took a break for a little.

The water is warm. Drops of water fall off the body of the Addison Montgomery. Her eyes set on the drain as the water directly hits and disperses on her head. There's no movement, just a woman frozen in time in the shower. I mean who doesn't do that? Stand in the shower just thinking of your inner most thoughts while at your most vulnerable position. Addison does that, perhaps Meredith as well. Things may have ended but that doesn't stop Addison from feeling guilty and paranoid. This shower was supposed to help her calm down and wake her up but it's actually doing the complete opposite. Her head is like a circus just thinking about many possibilities for the future. 

She steps out of the shower with a towel wrapped around her body. She lets her hair dry by itself over her shoulders. She comes out the bathroom and sees Jake barely getting up. He walks over and kisses her forehead before heading in to freshen up. Her look for the day is a red long sleeve blouse tucked into her white high waisted belted pants. She wears black high heeled boots that match her black coat since it's cold and rainy today. She sits on the vanity to get ready for the day. Today she's going out with Jake and Henry for breakfast and shopping. The Cathrine Fox Foundation Ball is tomorrow night and it's a black tie event. None of them brought clothes for that occasion so they're going to buy clothes for this event. 

*********

Meredith finishes feeding her kids before they go to school. Everything feels different for her. She feels lighter but yet she carries a bigger burden than before. Did she actually let her true love escape through her fingers? She now knows that Addison loves her back but she said it a day late. If she would have confessed even the day before she would have done anything in her power to be with her but just sitting and conversing with Jake opened her eyes. There is no need to ruin a good marriage over her own satisfaction. They had a family and she has her own family. She really didn't think about ever taking the next step but just this week with Addison has made her jump through steps with her. Meredith knows deep down that she would marry this woman and combine their families. But would Addison do the same?

Amelia has been staring at Meredith the whole time during breakfast. The kids left when the nanny took them to school and Maggie is on-call. It's just the two of them and they carpool together. 

"Jake was talking to me about your conversation."

"Really?" Says Meredith in a monotone voice. 

"He told me how you asked him about his way of getting Addison."

"Yeah, and?"

"What's going on with you and Addison?"

"This is the first time you ask me. You always brought it up indirectly. As if you're scared to know what's happening."

"Addie is my sister. She's family. I want to keep her safe and loved. She's already gone through so much and she doesn't deserve any more shit for something pointless."

"Here we go. You always say she's your sister and family yet you live with me and my children call you Aunt Amelia. We may have never gotten along that well from the start but I thought these years had made us actual sisters. But I guess I'll always be your second choice as long as your first choice is around. What about me Amelia?"

Amelia stays quiet for the first time. She's conflicted about Meredith's statement on their relationship and actually starts feeling bad for making Meredith feel small. Of course she loves her like a sister but she was right. As long as Addison is around, Meredith is going to be her second choice not first. 

"I love her Amelia. I love her enough that I let her go. Specifically last night. That conversation with Jake made me see her happy ending. She needs that. I lost mine when Derek died. She still has hers. Now if she chooses to do something differently, I will gladly stand by her. Until then, I have stopped communication with her and will continue to do so until she leaves. Then I won't have to confront her every day."

"Addison wouldn't throw her whole life away to be with you, you know. She's tough but not strong enough to blow up her marriage. That's why I called Jake to come. The only way Addison would destroy her marriage is if she were caught in the act. Having Jake here will make her either control herself or the opposite. But it's great you let her go. She's better off with him and Henry together as a happy family."

Amelia stands up from the table and goes into the hallway. Meredith feels a burning sensation in her stomach at the words Amelia just said. 'She's better off with him' just replays in her mind the whole day. Those words really hit her deep. Amelia knows where to hit you the hardest and she just did that to her. The suppressed anger for her sister-in-law starts to rise up again and make her feel disgust for her. She doesn't know Addison the way she's gotten to know her. Something deep down tells her that Addison will come running back to her. 

********

Addison, Jake, and Henry enter a formal apperal store to look for an outfit for the ball. Jake takes Henry with him to look for suits for himself and have Henry rate them. Addison walks over the the dresses while a worker approaches her. 

"Hi! Is there anything you have your mind on? I can help you with what you're looking for."

"Hello. Thank you. I'm looking for an elegant dress that I can wear for a black tie event."

"May I ask what the event is?"

"Yes, it's a ball for a foundation of doctors."

"Oh nice! Well you said ball so you'd need a dress that flows enough to let you dance. I have the perfect idea of what would look good on you."

The lady takes Addison to the many racks of dresses and picks out a few. She goes into the fitting room to try them on and she falls in love with the first dress. She walks out to show the worker. She's wearing a black halter top mermaid tail dress. It's backless all the way to her lower back. The dress highlights the curve of her body while showing off her back and arms. Addison loves it and the lady loves it too. The attendant goes to grab Jake and Henry to show them her look. Jake sets eyes on his gorgeous wife and is in love.

"My... You look stunning. That's the dress."

Addison blushes at his sweet words. She loves how Jake can make her feel beautiful in anything even her yale hoodie. Jake looked good as well. He was wearing a simple black tuxedo that will match excellently with her black dress. The good thing for her is that she brought black pumps that will go perfectly with this dress. Henry was more distracted with his iPad to notice how his mom radiated in that dress. Jake buys the clothes and they walk out with their wrapped up outfits. 

They spend the rest of their day walking around Downtown Seattle. They grab a snack for lunch then go out for dinner again. Addison takes them to a place where they can look out of the sightseeing binoculars. It's the same spot she shared with Derek so many years ago. Although they got divorced and didn't end the way she wanted, just being in this familiar place bring back her happy memories of Derek. His death hit her hard but when she chooses to think of him she remembers the happy memories they shared. Mainly in New York or med school. Seattle was more of their demise so she chooses to think as little of it as she can. Seattle is her happy place with Meredith but her burden with Derek. Jake holds her in his arm as they look over the city. Henry is using the machine to look closer and grasp in the view. 

They arrive back at the hotel and Henry is very tired. Addison walks him to his room and sits on his bed to tell him a bedtime story. Henry insists he's too old for stories but Addison continues. Soon Henry starts dozing off and she kisses him goodnight. She slowly creeps out the door and closes it softly. Jake is sitting in the living room couch waiting for her. They've already changed once they got to the room and are ready for bed. Addison walks over to the couch and lays on top of Jake. He starts caressing her back and circles his fingers along her scalp. Addison enjoys this as it helps her unwind. She wraps her arms around him and closes her eyes. She opens them slowly multiple times and the room gets darker until she's fast asleep. Jake loves it when Addison falls asleep in his arms. He loves the peacefulness of her sleep because it calms him. 

He slowly gets up with Addison in his arms. He walks towards their room and softly places Addison on her side of the bed. He pulls over the covers and kisses her forehead. He whispers in her ear, "I love you". He walks over to his side and gets into the cover. He pulls the lamp light off and the room is pitch black. This day feels like one of their good days. The love is there and nothing is in their way. Is Meredith actually the problem for her marriage? Being within her vicinity causes problems. The thing is Addison is the reason. Her love for Meredith is the problem. Not Meredith, not Seattle, but her heart. Sadly Jake doesn't know and Addison intends to keep it that way. For now.


	28. Morning of the Ball

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Amelia talks with both women.

The elevator doors open while Addison is on her phone. It's on floor three and she needs to be on floor four. She looks up and it's Meredith. She walks in and presses button four. Addison is in the back of the elevator just watching Meredith who is standing in the middle of the elevator. Meredith can feel Addison's glare and smirks. Elevators are her thing. She could press the emergency stop and turn around to make out with Addison but she shakes off the idea because she let her go. Both women have the day off since it's the day of the ball, but they both wanted to check in on their patients and work a bit. The doors open and both women walk out, side to side, silent. They both turn in opposite directions and head their separate ways. 

Addison checks on her high profile case patient. She shares the good news of her labs and bloodwork and tells her she's ready for her third and final surgery. She explains the risks which are substantially higher than before and asks her if she wishes to continue. The woman agrees and Dr. Montgomery-Reilly explains the way the surgery will go. She leaves the room and schedules the surgery for tomorrow evening. Addison feels confident about this surgery and knows she's going to be able to help her. She then remembers the surge of working in a hospital full time. The exhilaration of working on surgeries after surgeries, being in charge of a whole team of professionals, state of the art equipment, and of course some friendly competition of other fellow surgeons. Seaside Wellness is amazing, but there's days she wishes she worked at a hospital. On those days she works a long shift at St. Ambrose Hospital to remember that feeling but it will never be like GSMH or New York Hospital. 

Addison finished her hospital errands before noon. Just in time to meet up with Jake and Henry for lunch. She starts walking down the hall heading for the elevator. 

"Addie!"

"Amelia?" 

"Hey, where are you going? Let's go get some coffee I'm free right now. And from the looks of it, you are too."

Amelia grabs Addison by the arm and gets into an elevator with her. They go down to the coffee cart outside the hospital on the grass patch where there's benches for them to sit. Addison orders an americano and Amelia orders a hazelnut latte. They make small talk on the way to the coffee cart. Addison knows Amelia is about to hit her with the heavy stuff. To prepare for this conversation, she texts Jake saying she won't be able to make it to lunch because she's catching up with Amelia. They both walk over to a bench away from most people so they can talk. 

"So..."

"So..."

"Do you love her back? Because she sure does love you. I haven't seen Meredith like this since Derek. So Addison what are you doing? What happened between you and her? Was Jake ever relevant in your life?"

"Amelia. Meredith and I go back to the night we first met. Well the circumstances of our first encounter were complicated. But she came to my hotel room one night after Derek and I split. She wasn't seeing Derek either and she arrived partly drunk at my doorstep with a bottle of wine and a half-empty bottle of tequila. We were kind of drunk that night so I just thought it would be that one time. Then she came to my room again before I was leaving for L.A. and we were both sober this time. I don't know... It felt really good and I felt whole for those couple of hours but I thought it could never work out and that would be the last time for real. I did leave and when I came back we'd find a way back into each others arms. It's a connection that I can't really explain. But anyways it's over. It's done."

"You've been with her like a whole ass decade. Does Jake know? Have you told him yet?"

"No I haven't. There's nothing worth mentioning here right now. When we get back to L.A. I'll talk with him."

"Meredith said she loves you enough to let you go. Do you love her? Or do you love Jake?"

Addison looks down at her hands and stares at her coffee. She really thinks about this question. She loves Jake. He's her dream guy. The last man she ever wants to say 'I love you' to. But then there's Meredith Grey. The woman who was there at her breaking point. The woman who comforted her and loved her when no one else would. The woman she shared less time with but more of herself than with anyone. After sex they'd talk about themselves and share their little secrets and things that no one knew about them. Addison continues to look at the coffee and opens her mouth to talk.

"I love... Jake."

Amelia looks at Addison's head that's facing the coffee. She says, "Look me in the eye and tell me that."

Addison scoffs at Amelia's demand. She looks up at Amelia and stares into those eyes. The eyes that saw her naked with Mark. The same eyes that saw her in the stairwell with Meredith. The same eyes that saw her like the woman with flaws that don't define her. She's lied to Amelia enough. She deserves the truth. She's always been there for her and she should be completely honest with her. 

"I love Meredith."

Amelia turns away from Addison. She doesn't know what to say. She stands up knowing she got the answer she needed to hear. She looks down at Addison who's eyes are filled with tears. She opens her mouth to speak but she can't form any words. Instead she walks away and goes into the hospital. Addison stays at the bench looking up to the sky. She opens her eyes wide enough to let the tears stay where they are. 'A Montgomery does not cry in public' goes through Addison's mind. She thinks about her mother's voice telling her that. She then realizes she's in the same exact position that her mother faced years ago. Waves of remorse, guilt, and sadness strike her thinking about her mother. She judged Bizzy so hard for something that she's going through. Well at the time she didn't know that but now it's different. She stands up and walks towards the parking lot. 

"Damn it Bizzy." Mutturs Addison as she looks for the keys to the rental car. 

************

Amelia walks into the lobby and sees Meredith. She walks over and grabs her by the arm away from the middle of a conversation. She takes her into a supply closet. 

"Amelia!"

"Shhhhhh! Be quiet. People could hear us."

"Why?"

"You love her."

Meredith stays silent. She can't handle any more of Amelia and her determination to keep them apart. 

"Well I was just talking to Addie outside. I made her tell me who she loves. And she said..."

"Saiddd?"

"She said she loved Jake." 

Meredith feels enraged by Amelia's urgency to tell her this. She pushes past her and goes back out to the lobby. 

"Hey! Wait there's more!" 

Meredith is too furious to think about what else Amelia has to say. She's livid over the fact that Addison chose Jake again. She shouldn't feel this way but she can't help it. She needs to tell Addison that she's going to stand for her. No matter the cost. 

Amelia watches Meredith storm off. She didn't get to finish what she was saying. She was going to tell her that Addison said she loved Jake but when she asked her to look her in the eyes, she admitted she loves Meredith. She wanted to share that with Meredith. Maybe just maybe they were supposed to be together.


	29. The Catherine Fox Foundation Ball

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which they both attend a ball.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Sorry! I've been really busy. I haven't forgotten about this story I just haven't had the time to sit and update it. Sill try my best to keep updating more frequently!

Catherine Fox knows how to throw parties. This ball is more of a celebration for the achievements of great doctors and a thank you to them. Invites are a top notch thing meaning if you aren't in the radar for her, you aren't invited. The foundation rented the ballroom floor of a five star hotel in Downtown Seattle. As this ball is a black tie event, everyone is dressed to their highest quality. Most of the doctors from GSMH are here. 

'Wow' thinks Meredith as she enters the ballroom. Everything is decorated with a sliver and blue color scheme. She walks in a black one shoulder dress. The back of her dress is long to the point where it glides across the ground as she walks. She came with Amelia and Maggie. Amelia is dress in a shiny sleeveless red dress and Maggie is in a turquoise suede off the shoulder dress. All women look spectacular. Meredith had her hair done by Maggie and makeup by herself. She looks stunning. 

Many people are on the dancefloor with their partners dancing to the slow song. Meredith envisions herself dancing with Addison on that floor. Since all three women came single, they head straight to the bar. 

As they all sit at the bar Maggie catches their attention.

"Woah..." Says Maggie as she watches Dr. Addison Forbes Montgomery-Reilly walk down the steps of the stairs. 

"Oh my god Addie." Says Amelia amazed with her look. 

Meredith just stares in awe at the beauty of Addison. She's wearing the black halter top, backless, mermaid dress. Her lips are red, her hair is blown out and parted to the side, and her radiant smile just brings it together. She's holding Jake's hand as they walk down the stairs. Meredith heart skips a beat when they make eye contact. As Meredith is staring at Addison, Amelia is staring at Meredith. 

"I-I have to go." Says Meredith in a hurry.

"No wait." Says Amelia as she grabs Meredith's arm. 

"Not again Amelia. Stop that. I don't know what your problem is."

"No Meredith, it's not that. You never let me finish earlier."

"Why should I. So you could give me your full opinion? Or for you to try to downplay me more and compare me to her as a better sister?"

"Meredith."

"I don't want to think about what you have to say."

Meredith gets lost in the crowd and looks for the restroom. Amelia tries to follow her and loses her. The she looks up and sees she's gone into the restroom. She follows after her. 

Meredith is by the sink trying to catch her breath. She can't handle being in the same room as Addison with someone else. She doesn't want to be apart from her any longer. She may have let her go but she regrets it now. She wants to go fight for her. She wants a sign or something. Amelia told her that Addison picked Jake. Maybe she's just not enough for her. Meredith wants to show Addison that she's more than enough for her. She can be her world, her everything, her better half. They can live a perfect life. She can't wait any longer. Then Amelia bursts in. 

"Meredith! Shut up and listen to me."

Meredith turns around and faces Amelia. She leans against the sink table and is all ears for Amelia's words.

"You never let me finish. Addison said she loves Jake. But when I asked her to look me in the eye and tell me that, she just couldn't. She looked me straight in the eye and said she loves you. Meredith told me how she feels about you. I don't know how to feel about this yet. But I do know is that you love her and she loves you back and there's a poor naive man out there who is oblivious to all of this." 

Meredith feels ecstatic that Addison does love her more than Jake. She wants to run out and announce it to the world. Meredith walks out the restroom and looks around the dance floor. She sees Addison with Jake talking to Cathrine Fox and Jackson Avery. Jake has one if his hand on her upper back as the pair are standing together. Meredith takes that as a small hit to her heart. She goes back to the bar and orders tequila and just keeps watching Addison until she's free. 

Meredith is lost in time and staring off into space while just thinking about Addison. Jackson walks over the bar and orders a whiskey. He catches Meredith in space. He takes the drinks and sits next to her. 

"Hey."

"Oh hey!"

"You seemed very take away in your thoughts."

"Yeah, I was just thinking about something." 

"What's wrong? Why aren't you enjoying this party?"

"Why aren't you?"

"Valid point. Well I'll take a drink to that." 

They both lift up their drinks and clink them together and take a sip. Everyone on the dancefloor are having their time of their lives. The music is upbeat and then suddenly it stops. Catherine Fox steps to the stage and speaks into the microphone.

"Hello Everybody! I hope you are enjoying this ball! This year we went with a simple silver and blue scheme. There's a lovely photo center to take pictures to great backdrops. Waiters will come out soon with nice finger foods to help you with your appetite, and of course the bar is open free of charge! Please enjoy this evening as a way of gratitude for everyone's hard effort and work in this field. Without all of you, there would be no advance in science. Now for the first official slow dance of the night. Ladies and Gentlemen gather around your partner for this dance."

Jake lends out his hand for Addison and the walk to the stage. He pulls her in close as he places one hand on her lower back. He hold her other hand high and looks into her beautiful eyes. They're sparkling and Addison looks gorgeous. At this moment in time, Addison is just lost with Jake. This feels right. She feels safe. She feels comfortable. He's been her rock for so long. Why bother to change it this late in the game. If she were even 10 years younger she would have done anything to be with Meredith but right now it's a bigger decision. Should she blow up her marriage for something she doesn't know will work. This questions drive her crazy and she looks to the side. Jake leans his head on Addisons heas as they move swiftly with the music.

"Well, you've been sitting here long enough. Meredith, can I have this dance?" Asks Jackson as he lends out his hand.

"Yes." Says Meredith as she grabs his hand and they walk to the dance floor. They get in position to slow dance. Jackson is great on his feet and move them around so greatly. Meredith giggles a bit as she tries to keep up the pace with Jackson. She looks at him and give him a confused smile. He looks at her and slows down because this is a slow dance. They moves pretty fast around to the point that they were in front of Addison and Jake. 

Addison notices Jackson and sees those similar hands. Jake is facing the opposite direction so he can't see her facial expression. Jackson starts turning slowly and she notices it's Meredith. Jackson turns completely around until it's Meredith and Addison staring at each other. The sparkle in Meredith eys drive Addison crazy. All she wants to do is let go of Jake and run off with Meredith. She notices Meredith moving her mouth and she can't hear anything. She tries to read her lips and then it hits her. Meredith is mouthing, "I love you." Addison's face gets red but thank goodness that she's wearing makeup. She tells Jake she has to go to the bathroom and that she'll be right back. 

"Hey I have to go do something really quick. I'll find you later." Says Meredith as she pulls out of Jackson's embrace to go find Addison. She sees her go up the stairs and Meredith soon follows. Addison heads out the double doors to the lobby area of the banquet floor.

"Addison!"

Addison looks around and tries to find a place to go clear her thoughts. 

"Addison!"

She finds a small room with a couch. It's probably a meeting room that people can reserve. She walks in and starts to pace around. Meredith walks in and just watches as Addison paces across the room. She closes the door and locks it. No one knows they're in here and no one can barge in. 

"Addison." 

Meredith just gets flashbacks to her time with Derek in the exam room the night of the prom. Everything feels like Deja Vu. This time Addison is in her shoes and she's in Derek's shoes. If this is going like the prom went then she's excited. 

Addison even in her worried state is such a beautiful masterpiece. Her whole look tonight has Meredith weak on her knees. Both of them decided to wear all black as well. They complement each other so well. Meredith knows what Addison needs.

Meredith walks over to Addison, cups her face, and pulls her in for a kiss. Now this kiss has sparks. It's the opening to the burning desire they have of each other. Meredith let's her mouth open up to give room for Addison's tongue. Even though it's been a few days since their last kiss, Meredith feels like it has been ages. Then Addison pulls herself back and says, "wait."


	30. The Catherine Fox Foundation Ball Pt. 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Addison gets paged.

"Wait."

"What Addison?"

"Jake thinks I'm in the restroom. We can't do this right now."

"We can't do this right now or we can't do this ever?"

"Did you lock the door?" 

"Yes, but you didn't fin-"

Addison pulls Meredith back into a deep kiss. Her soft lips gently glide through hers. Their lipsticks combine and some gets in their mouths. Meredith's tongue swiftly cuts through her mouth and inside her. Addison moans at the sensation of her tongue. Addison grabs her by the waist and pushes her completely in her embrace. Meredith tries to stand up as tall as she can to be up to Addison's height. She has her hands cupped on her cheeks while she is facing upward to continue their kiss. Addison moves one of her hands to the crook her Meredith's neck and pushes her in closer. Their lips are throughly connected and Meredith's tongue is as far as it can reach inside Addison's mouth. 

Addison pulls back and places her forehead on Meredith's. They're both with their eyes closed just taking in this sweet moment. Meredith lowers her hand and wraps them around Addison. Addison is taller than Meredith by a couple of inches so she tilts her upper body down a bit to be at a better level with her. Addison moves her head to Meredith's ear and softly bites the top of her ear. Then she whispers, "I love you Meredith Grey."

"I love you too Addison Montgomery."

Addison walks away but holds Meredith's hand. They both walk to the door and Addison faces Meredith. 

"Wait for me. I'm coming back for you okay? It's just going to take some time. We still got two more days."

"I'll wait for you Addison. I have nowhere else to go but you."

Addison kisses Meredith's forehead and unlocks the door. She walks out to go find Jake. Meredith stays in the room and just leans against the wall thinking about Addison finally being with her. Waking up to her. Kissing her. Having awesome shower sex with. Eating her out anytime. Meredith blushes really hard. She feels like a school girl with a crush. 

Addison is out in the hall and accidentally bumps into Jake. 

"Addison? Where were you? I thought you said you'd be in the restroom?"

"Sorry I got lost and then I just started walking around here. It's so nice."

"Oh okay. Let's go dance babe." 

Jake pulls his hand over Addison's shoulder and walks toward the doors that lead to the ballroom. Meredith walks out of the room and notices Jake holding Addison as they walk down the hall. She feels angry that he still has her. Addison turns her head sideways almost enough for Meredith to see. She bites her lip at Meredith and she barely caught that look. She can feel her thong getting wet because of Addison's tease.

**********

"I love you Addison." Says Jake as he has his eyes closed while leaning his head against Addison's shoulder. One of his hands is dangerously low on her back while the other is wrapped in her other arm. Addison has her eyes wide open looking around the dance floor. She's searching for Meredith and almost forgets to reply to Jake. She finds Meredith in the crowd and says, "I love you too." While she directly stares into Meredith.

Meredith makes eye contact with Addison and read her lips. She's dancing with a random doctor but is just watching Addison gracefully dance. When Addison is no longer facing her direction, Meredith just admires her bare back. Oh to lick her back, or plant kisses along her spine, or bite her shoulder. The dress dips pretty low to her hips. She can image how her thong looks like. Seeing the dip of her lower back makes her wet enough to start dripping a bit off her thong. She needs Addison to relieve her. Tonight. 

"Honey we should go. It's getting pretty late and we have to relieve the nanny." Says Addison.

"Yeah, let's go." Says Jake as he grabs Addison by the hand and walk towards the coat room. They get their things and leave. Meredith watches them go. She goes back to her table where Amelia and Maggie are sitting. They're both on their phones and Amelia hasn't seemed to notice those eye exchanges with Addison. She grabs her purse and she just got a message from Addison. 

'Page me 911 in about an hour and a half.'

Oh Addison also wants to take Meredith on. Their kisses were not enough in that room. They need more. Way more. Meredith replies with a thumbs up emoji. 

"Hey guys I'm gonna get going. It's pretty late. I have to be at the hospital tomorrow morning. Are y'all staying here?" 

"Yeah I'm going to stay. Maybe a hot doctor will ask me to dance." Says Maggie.

"Meredith it's barely 11pm. There's free drinks. What's the hurry?" Amelia says suspiciously.

"Okay then. I'll see you guys tomorrow. Get home safely." 

Amelia looks at Meredith grabbing her keys and walking to the coat room. She feels like running to stop her from whatever she's going to do but that's not her business anymore. Jake's here. He's smart enough to figure it out. He'll realize Addison is cheating on him. 

********

"Goodnight Henry." Simultaneously come out of Addison and Jake. They're both still dressed and walk out slowly. Jake closes the door then wraps his arms around Addison. Addison can feel his hardness through his pants. He wants to fuck right now. She lets Jake rub around her ass. She really wishes her phone will vibrate so she can go take that urgent page. She's already so horny for Meredith that she basically gives in to Jake. Besides they're still married and they haven't had sex in a while. Addison turns her head a bit and kisses Jake. He pulls his hands up over her stomach until he reaches her boobs. He squeezes them and she bites his lip as he does that. Addison looks forward as Jake brings his arms up to take off the neck buttons of her dress. As soon as they're off, the top half of her dress flaps down and lets her silky breast come to the light. 

They're still in the living room and they barely put Henry down. Jake runs his hands across her boobs as he lowers his head to her upper back. He bites her shoulder and she moans. 

"Shhhh."

Addison let's out a long breath as a way to make noise. "Mmmm." Addison whispers softly as Jake starts to kiss her spine and make his way to the bottom. Addison is holding on to the table in the living room and feels herself get wet from this. Jake is bent down while kissing Addison's lower back. He grabs the zipper on the side and starts to pull...

Addison's phone goes off.

Jake stands up and goes to her purse. He checks the phone and it's a 911 page. 

"Damn, I really wanted this night with you. It's an emergency Addie."

"Mm. We can continue this later." Says Addison seductively. She walks to the counter and grabs the keys and then takes her purse from Jake. She makes her way to the door before Jake stands in front of her. She kisses him hungrily and with her free hand grabs on to the hardness seeping out of his pants. He let's out a quick sigh, completely surprised at that. Addison then opens the door and walks out. 

She's sitting at the drivers seat in the garage and calls Meredith. 

"I'm in the parking garage of the Archfield. Where should I go?"

"Come pick me up from the hospital. I came and parked my car here." 

"I'll be there in a few."

"Oh and Addison, hurry. I'm very wet right now and I really want to touch myself."

"Just wait until I get there." Says Addison very seductively. 

Addison drives to the hospital and gets there in about 10 minutes. She sees Meredith's car parked by the side entrance. She's still in her black dress as well. She pulls up right next to her and watches Meredith get out of her car and come up to hers. They're both staring at each other. Meredith brings one of her hands over and moves it up from Addison's upper thighs to her the crook of her neck. She fingers along the bottom of her jawline up to her mouth where she slides her index finger in. Addison sucks on her finger while directly looking in Meredith's eyes. This makes both of them very wet. Meredith pulls her finger out and puts it inside her mouth. 

"Remember that hotel by the airport when we parked in the parking garage. Lets go there and rent a room." Suggests Meredith. 

Addison nods her head, flustered with thought of Meredith going over her mind. She starts driving and gets on the main road. They get on the ferry and both women stay in the car. They can't really slip out of their dresses in the car so they just sit and watch the water through their car. The sexual tension in the car gets overwhelming and Addison can feel her wetness grow larger over the second. Meredith is already a mess down there and all she wants is Addison to annihilate her. 

The ferry ride is over and they get back to driving. They finally reach the hotel and park in the garage. No one knows who they are in this place so they walk while holding each other's hands. They make their way to the lobby and ring the bell.

"Hello?" Says Meredith.

"Oh hi. How can I help you fine ladies?"

"Can we book a room for the night?"

"Yes, let me check the availability. Oh we only have the presidential suite available. Is that okay?"

"Yes that's alright." 

They go through the paperwork and they finally get the keys. Both women are all giggly and excited like if they're teens and not grown women. As they get in the elevator, Addison pushes Meredith against the wall. They're going up to the 4th floor but suddenly the doors open up at floor 3. Both women frantically separate from each other and pretend like nothing was going on. They finally get to their floor. Their room is 411 and it's at the end of the hall. They walk calm and collected to try and not draw attention to themselves. Meredith slides the room key and the door opens...


	31. Catherine Fox Foundation Ball Pt. 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which no one picks up the phone.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys! Thank you so much for following this story. I know some people didn't like it but for those of you who did, thank you. It really means a lot. I'd love to hear your comments about what you think of the story and any insight you have. 
> 
> We're nearing the end of this story. This chapter is the longest so far. I didn't think it would be best to separate it in half so I left it all as one. The [][][][] will signify that every part is happening simultaneously. Hope you enjoy!

Jake called back the nanny to look over Henry. Something has been off with Addison this whole week. But tonight something was definitely wrong. He felt that she left for a different reason rather than an emergent page. He's not naive but he doesn't want to think it's adultery. He'd rather wish it's something stupid, but cheating is something he won't accept. Addison should know what happens, well maybe old habits die hard. Jake really thought he was enough for Addison. There's nothing he really did to hurt her, if anything he's always been there for her. What would drive her to cheat on him? Jake ponders this while in the uber to GSMH. 

He closes the car door and walks in the main entrance of the hospital. He goes up to the surgical floor and looks around. He doesn't see Addie anywhere. He walks to the board to see if she's in surgery, yet her name is not there. He goes to each O.R. gallery just to check if she was there. Again no Addie. Well she could be in the I.C.U. because maybe she's out. He goes through every room and no sign of her. A nurse asks him if he's okay, Jake tells her that he's looking for Dr. Montgomery. She takes him over to the I.C.U. nurses station and checks the computer to see if she's here. 

"Oh sorry. It says Dr. Montgomery hasn't been here since the morning. Maybe she's in the labor and deliver wing?"

"Thank you" says Jake. His heart's pace starts slowly rising up as there's no sign of Addison in this hospital. He goes to the labor and delivery wing and looks around every room and again no Addie. At this point his furious. He picks up the phone and calls her. The phone rings until it reaches her voicemail. Jake knows something is wrong. He orders another uber to take him to the ball just in case she went there instead. In the meantime while he waits, he goes through every on call room to check if she would be there with another man. All he finds are doctors sleeping and empty beds. Where could she be?

[][][][][][][][][][][][][]

Not even seconds after they close the hotel door, they're fiercely making out. At this point they are standing between the door and the bed. Nothing in their minds, only the love for the other one. Meredith pulls back and smiles at Addison. Addison cups her right cheek as they both gasp for air. 

"I love you" Says Addison all smiley.

"I love you too. Now take off your shoes. You're too tall." Replies Meredith. 

Addison smiles and walks over to sit on the bed. She takes off her black pumps and stands back up to face Meredith. They're almost the same height but Addison is still a bit taller, even with Meredith in heels. Meredith raises her arms up to Addison's neck and wraps them loosely around. They connect in a series of soft loving kisses. Addison pulls in Meredith and lets her hands rest on her lower back. Just with a slight tilt of Addison's head deepens their kiss. The space between their lips widen as both of their tongues roam around. It's like a slow dance between their tongues. The swiftness is so delicate that it makes this kiss special. It's a loving kiss, not an 'I want to fuck you' kiss or a pointless kiss. It's their moment. In the distance, there's a vibration coming from Addison's purse but both of them are so deeply concentrated that no one hears it. 

Meredith starts to unwrap her hands and moves them to Addison's neck buttons from the dress. While still kissing, Meredith unbuttons the piece and the top of her dress falls forward. It gets stuck between both of their chests since they're on each other. Addison pulls back and let's the upper part of the dress fall forward showing off her breasts. Meredith steps forward and places one of her hands on Addison's lower back and the other one on the back of her neck. This time their kisses are about sex. Meredith moves her kisses to her cheek then to her jawline. Slowly she moves to the side of her neck and softly plants kisses there. Addison hums at the sensation of her bare breast rubbing on Meredith and the kisses around her neck. Meredith continues to gradually go down Addison's neck until she hits her collarbone. She nibbles in the area and that drives Addison crazy. She moves her hand down in a trail from the back of her neck to the center of her chest. She brings up her other hand along her lower hip to under her left breast. She bends down a bit to be level with Addison's nice breasts. 

She slowly glides her hands around both her boobs and grabs as much as her hands can hold. She pulls on them and Addison moans. She moves her face closely and takes in a nipple in her mouth. She swirls her tongue around the hardened nipple and sucks on it. Addison is continually humming to Meredith's touch. Meredith widens her mouth and takes in more of Addison's breast while she squeezes the other and plays around with it. To be fair, Meredith stops and switches to the other boob to do the same. She slightly tugs on the other nipple with her teeth and Addison moans at that. Just a soft sting. She pulls her head back and blows on her breasts. The air agaisnt her wet nipples feels nice to Addison and she smiles at that. Meredith comes back up and turns Addison around. She places both hands on her bare back and pushes her slowly so Addison can bend down a little. Addison places both hands on the bed so she can support herself. Meredith stands directly behind her with their lower bodies touching. 

[][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][]

The uber arrives to the hospital and Jake gets in. He probably thinks Addison wanted to go back to the ball by herself. He sure hopes that's what it is. He gets out the car and sees people still walking in. Well it's only half past midnight and people are still arriving. He wonders at what time this will end. Luckily he's still in his tuxedo so he walks right back in. As he's walking down the staircase to the dancefloor, he looks around to see if he could find Addison. In a room full of people he can spot her in seconds because she's always the most beautiful in the room, but right now there's no traces of her. He walks around the floor and she's not dancing with anyone here. He walks over to the tables and no Addie.

Amelia is still sitting at the table with Maggie. They haven't left and it's been about an hour since Meredith left. 

"Maybe we should go." Suggests Maggie.

Amelia shrugs at that and then she catches Jake looking confused. Wait why would Jake be here. She thought they already left. 

"Jake!"

Jake walks over to their table and looks dazed. Amelia then realizes Addison isn't with him. It hits her. Meredith left right after Addison left. Now he's here looking for her and she's not here. 

"What's wrong?"

"I'm looking for Addison. She wasn't at the hospital, but she got an emergent page. I think there's something wrong Amelia." Says Jake worried. 

Maggie looks surprised and turns to Amelia with that shocked look. Amelia has a serious face. She's debating whether she should tell Jake that Addison is cheating on him but she decides against it. She's going to let him figure it out but that won't stop her from helping him. 

"I think I have an idea of where she might be." Says Amelia as she starts to gather her things. She drove herself but waited for Meredith and Maggie so she could walk in the ball together. All of this has her thinking about herself and where she stands. She loves Meredith but Addison has to be her number one. She was there at her lowest and helped her when no one would. Everyone in L.A. will be first rather than the people here. But she loves Meredith too. She's not easy but she's lent her a hand and Derek loved her. They've grown closer and that makes her happy. But now both of them together makes Amelia feel all sorts of things. Since when has Addison been gay or how were they together for so long and no one noticed. Amelia is all for girl love but it's different between those two. She wants to help them but she also doesn't. Anyways she thinks Jake has the right to know and Addison needs to face this issue again but better. She doesn't want to be an associate to her cheating again. She does this for Addison not Meredith. If it were any other woman and Meredith, she would do anything in her power to help. 

Amelia walks out with Jake and leaves Maggie alone with no information of what she's doing or where she's going. They walk into the parking garage of the place and go to her car. She starts the car and Jake asks her, "What do you think she's doing?" Amelia doesn't want to respond and she just turns to look at him. She gives him that face that means her mouth is shut. He knows Amelia is like a vault for Addison but he wishes he would tell her.

"I guess this is why you called me to come. You wanted me to figure it out for myself." 

Amelia gives him a sad expression and he just sits there now knowing Addison is cheating on him. He really thought Addison would never do that to him. He thought she was done with all of that. He looks back at Amelia and says, "Can you at least tell me who it is?" 

"It's...

[][][][][][][][][][][][][][]

"Meredith" says Addison in a breathy voice. She's basically asking her to hurry up. She wants to feel her at her core already. Meredith is grazing over Addison's back. She traces her fingers along the line of her back all the way down to her lower hips. She bends over and starts to plant kisses along her back. She trails the kisses from the top of her spine as she has her hand follow over her back. Addison starts to arch her back downwards and moves her arms to rest on her forearms over the bed. When Addison moves, she brings up her ass to her abdomen. She continues to kiss her back until she reaches the dip of her lower back. She gives it a long wet kiss and stands upright. 

Meredith reaches the side of her dress where she has no sleeve and undoes the zipper. She lets the dress fall, and there she stands with only a black thong. She unzips the side of Addison's dress and it slips off completely and she too is wearing a black thong. Meredith brings two fingers and rubs the center of her core to feel Addison's wetness. She's soaked. Addison moans at the touch where she's begging for it. She pulls on the thong and brings it over the side of her ass. She holds it in place with her hand while she runs her hand from the bottom of her back down to her core. Addison feels shivers through her body when she feels a direct touch at her pussy. Meredith encircles her opening with her thumb. Then she slowly starts to insert her thumb inside Addison.

"Meredith" gasps out Addison at the feeling of something inside her already. 

Meredith starts to drive her thumb around the inner walls of Addison as she moans out for more. With an up and down wrist motion, Meredith pulls and pushes her thumb inside Meredith. She picks up the pace and starts to really jam her thumb deep inside. Addison arches her back even further and screams for Meredith. She's close and Meredith really wants to feel Addison's cum drip down her hand. She pushes her thumb in harder and faster and Addison continues to yell. Meredith moves her thumb a little lower just enough to hit Addison in a good spot. She screams out as she climaxes. Meredith feels her juices start flowing out of her core all over her thumb and hand. Her warm wetness makes Meredith even more hungry for Addison's touch. She slowly pulls back her drenched thumb and brings it up to her mouth. She sucks on Addison's sweet finish and makes a pop sound when she pulls her thumb out of her mouth. 

Meredith lets go of Addison's thong and bends down. She runs her hands along the back of Addison's calves up to her ass. She wraps her fingers along the sides of her thong and slowly pulls down. When thong is almost off she sees Addison's wetness still attached to the center. She runs her fingers along her slickness and pulls it to disconnect it from her thong. She rubs the wetness along her inner thighs as Addison moans louder and longer. Meredith then pulls the thong all the way down so she can see Addison's slick center. 

Meredith moves in to her center and starts to suck on her juices and lower lips. 

"Oh, fuck" says Addison between moans. 

Meredith changes her position from crouching to being on her knees. She lowers herself a bit more and spreads Addison's legs a bit to get a better area to eat. She has both hands on Addison's gorgeous hips while she sucks and kisses her center. Her opening is visible enough for her to roll up her tongue and try to push it inside her as far as she can. She moves her head forward to get her tongue in farther. She moves her tongue in and out into her opening. Addison moans out for Meredith as she grabs on to the sheets of the bed. Meredith brings one of her hands down from her hip, under her legs, and over core. She moves her middle finger from the top her slit to the sensational part of her clit. She rubs her finger along in an up and down motion and that gets Addison worked up. 

"Fuck... Meredith!" Yells out Addison.

Meredith brings her middle finger inwards and inserts it inside Addison. Now she's using her tongue and finger to fuck Addison. Addison continues to moan out for Meredith without a care in the world. Meredith loves the taste of Addison's remnants of her previous finish with a new one suddenly emerging. Her middle finger gets covered in her slick wetness. Her tongue gets to taste her straight from her opening. She sucks in as much of Addison's cum she can hold and devours her. She leaves her dry at her core and moves back. She gets up from her knees and stands up. She slaps the side of Addison's ass then caresses it. With her other hand she pulls at Addison's hip to tell her to stand up straight. Addison so flustered with both her orgasms stands up and turns to face her woman. 

[][][][][][][][][][][][][]

"Can you at least tell me who it is?" Asks Jake while facing Amelia with uncertainty in her face. 

"It's Meredith." Confesses Amelia. 

"Meredith Grey?" Says Jake confused.

"Meredith Grey." Reassures Amelia. 

Amelia pulls out of the garage and gets on the road. She plans on taking them to Meredith's house. Meredith said she was leaving to go home so if she's there so could Addison. It would be messed up if Meredith lied to her as well and never showed back home. The atmosphere between her and Jake is radio silent. He hasn't said a word after Amelia told him it was Meredith Grey. I mean who wouldn't go crazy thinking their wife is cheating not with another man but with a woman. 

Jake is genuinely shocked hearing his wife is out with another woman. At this point he doesn't need proof anymore. He's done. It may not be another man but it's still adultery. He just can't accept it. Now he does feel like he's not enough for her. Maybe a woman can only satisfy Addison the way she needs it. He tries to think back to the times they had conversations about the LGBTQ community. She never once mentioned she was bisexual or anything. She always supported the community but I guess her true identity never made the conversation. Maybe it was irrelevant to her since she was with Jake. Now suddenly he feels that Addison may have not felt truly in love with him. He knows the story behind Addison's mother and maybe Addie is passing through the same thing. Was she hiding her true self and trying to make it work with him. He doesn't want to imagine this but Addison really left him no choice. 

They drive into the driveway of Meredith's house and the only car parked is the nanny's. Amelia looks at Jake and his eyes are just full of tears. She says nothing and pulls out. She drives them to the hospital. That's the last place that she knows of that Meredith might be. Jake looks directly out of the window and lets a few tears fall from his eyes. His marriage is over. He thought he finally settled down with the most amazing woman. He thought he would live out his days with Addison and Henry. Now everything has gone to hell and he doesn't know what's going to happen. He knows he's prepared to fight for Henry in case it leads to that but right now he's just trying to get through the night. 

They get on a ferry and continue to drive until they reach the hospital. Amelia pulls into the parking lot and drives around to look for Meredith's car. It's not parked in the main parking lot. She drives to the side lots and no car. She finally drives to the back lot and spots Meredith's car. Luckily there's an empty spot next to it and she parks there. Both of them look over and see that the car is empty. Jake gets out the car angrily and walks over to the empty car to get a closer look inside. Nothing. No one is inside. Amelia steps out and she just watches Jake. He has his hands above his head as he paces around. He's looking up to the sky trying to keep in his tears. Amelia feels sorry for him. She knew about this but didn't tell him directly but she did help him at least. Jake pulls out his phone and dials Addison's number again. Voicemail again. Amelia does the same but to Meredith which she also gets voicemail. 

"How long did you know about this Amelia?" Says Jake enraged. 

"Don't you dare get mad at me. I called you the day I found out when I told you something was wrong. Addison is like a sister to me. I can't throw her under the bus everytime she messes up. She asked me to keep it secret but I wasn't going to sit back and watch this unfold the same way it did years ago. I promised her I wouldn't tell you but that didn't mean I couldn't help you get there. You found out because you sensed it. I found out by accident while I was in the stairwell. I heard them fighting about their relationship. That there enraged me. I thought, 'not again Addie.' So I made it my mission to get you to find out for yourself. And here you are. So in no way am I responsible for what happened nor are you. Jake don't take this upon yourself. You did nothing wrong. It was them."

"I'm done." Sighs out Jake. He looks up the fastest flight to L.A. for two people. He finds one that flies out in about 3 hours. He buys it and then calls Addison again. He reaches voicemail and he leaves a message.

"Hey, I'm taking Henry and we're flying out in three hours." 

Jake is really done. This is irreparable to their relationship. He doesn't think he'll ever be able to forgive Addison for this. He gets back in the car and asks Amelia to drive him to the hotel so he can get Henry and his things. 

[][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][]

Addison cups Meredith's cheek and slides the the strand in her face behind her ear. She's gorgeous. She can see herself waking up to her every morning and falling asleep to her every night. She did feel that for Jake too but something changed along the years. Jake was everything for her. Everything she ever needed. But Meredith was something else. Meredith was different she was the everything she never knew she wanted. She was the unexpected thing that she wants as her every day expectation. She always knew Meredith felt that way but it was more difficult for her. 

She pulls Meredith in for deep kiss. The kiss that leaves them breathless and wanting for more. She pushes Meredith back to make her fall on the bed. They both move up the bed to be completely on the bed. She continues to kiss her lips and softly tugs her lower lip with her teeth. Meredith is completely flat on bed while Addison is completely over her. Her legs are between Meredith's as she rubs herself on her thigh. That friction gives her some relief to her aching core. I mean she already had two orgasms and Meredith had none but she's going to take as much as she can. Her hair is completely over her face and on top of Meredith's face. They smile in the middle of their kiss and Meredith pulls it all to one side and grabs it to give them some air. Addison kisses her more as she starts to trail her finger down from her abdomen to the border of her black little thong. She slides her fingers inside and feels Meredith's sticky mess. 

"You sure are wet for me, aren't you?"

"Mmhm."

Addison twirls her fingers around the wetness and pulls her finger out. She pulls her head back and looks at her. She pulls down her tongue to signify she wants Meredith to bring out her tongue. Meredith obliges and Addison takes her slick fingers and rubs off all of her juices on her tongue. Meredith tastes herself and smiles while she looks directly into Addison's gorgeous eyes. Addison leans back in and they continue to kiss passionately. She brings her fingers back to her center and rubs circles around her bottom lips. Meredith moans into Addison's mouth while she does that. Addison slips her middle and ring finger into her slit and rubs around. She then starts to rub around her clitoris and Meredith moans louder. She moves her fingers really fast and then moves them down further where she reaches the top of her opening. In one swift motion she inserts her two longest fingers inside Meredith's core. 

"Oh Addison" moans Meredith into her mouth. 

Meredith feels her orgasm getting closer and she can only leave her mouth opened to allow herself to moan better. Addison continues to kiss her with her mouth open and allows her tongue to roam around the walls of her mouth. She hooks and curls her fingers inside Meredith. She knows she's getting closer because she starts to move her hips and cry out for her. Meredith's walls start to clench and soon her cum starts flowing out. Meredith is gasping for air as her last moan was so long that it took her a full breath. Addison kisses her lips and goes down on Meredith. 

Somewhere in the distance Addison's phone rumbles meaning someone is calling her. Soon after Meredith's phones screen flashes on with Amelia's face showing she's calling her. Meredith has her phone on silent. She doesn't want anything to interrupt them. They're to busy and concentrated to hear the vibrating as they continue. 

Addison licks her bottom lips. They're so soft and wet and that makes her start getting wet again. She goes to french kiss her bottom lips. Meredith moans at the feeling of Addison's lips and tongue down there. Addison continues to kiss and play with her tongue along Meredith's slit. She lowers herself a bit and takes in some of her cum. Meredith came a lot and Addison takes in a lot but some starts to drip the side of her mouth. She continues to suck and kiss her as she turns her head up to make eye contact with Meredith. She gives her that devilish smile and Meredith moans louder. She continues to eat her out. She stops for a bit and Meredith is still very wet. Addison comes back up and slips her legs between Meredith again. This time she raises herself higher to touch her core with hers. Their wet centers mix and their fluids collide with each other. They both moan at the same time.

Addison grabs on to Meredith's waist and moves her hips in a circle motion to get their clits to strike each other in the right spots. Meredith pulls her head back and moans with Addison. She grabs on to her hips and pushes her down to have her touch her more. Scissoring is Meredith's favorite thing to do with Addison because she can always find that spot where they both get off. Addison drastically changes the rhythm and pace and starts to move in a up and down motion quickly. It catches Meredith by surprise as she gasps for air. Meredith can feel herself about to come and Addison feels the same. Meredith tries to move her hip upwards and Addison moans at that. They both start moving their hips in sync and cum at the same time. 

"Ohhh Addison" sighs out Meredith while she finishes.

Addison continues to move her hips around but this time she wants to rub their cum around their core. Meredith grabs on Addison's ass and pushes her down. She falls over next Meredith and they lay there heavily breathing. They intertwine their fingers and lay there in silence for moment. Addison props herself up and looks at Meredith face. They smile. She runs her finger along Meredith's abdomen as they just stare at each other. Meredith pulls her head up to steal a kiss from Addison. In the distance Addison's phone vibrates again and once again it's unheard. Addison falls back and starts to doze off. It's about 2am and they need some sort of sleep. She has that important surgery at 11am and then she's done with her work in Seattle. 

[][][][][][][][][][][][][][][][]

Amelia waits for Jake outside The Archfield. He comes out and Henry is still in his pajamas looking very sleepy. Jake buckles him in and sits with him in the back. Their stuff fits in the back seat. It wasn't much, just a suitcase. They were only here for a couple of days. 

"Hi auntie Amelia." Says Henry very tired.

"Hey Henry. How's my strong little boy doing?"

"Fine. Where are we going?"

"We're going home little man." Responds Jake as they start to drive to the airport.

"What about mommy?" 

"She has work still but she'll be back in a couple of days."

"Why are we leaving now?"

"Because you have school on Monday and we need to get some stuff organized today. You know it's already Sunday?"

"Okay." Says Henry as he lays his head on Jake's shoulder and falls asleep. 

They get to the airport and Jake carries Henry out. He puts him down and tells him to hug Amelia goodbye. He goes over to Amelia and hugs her then Jake comes in and hugs her at the same time. He looks at her and mouths 'thank you'. As he walks into the terminal with Henry he looks back and Amelia mouths 'I'm sorry'. Amelia gets back in the car and sits there. Shit is about to go down. She calls Addison this time and no answer. It goes to voicemail. She texts Meredith and types 'It have better been worth it' and hits send. She pulls out of the side of the terminal and drives away. None of them have replied or answered but when they see their missed calls they know everything from before won't be the same.


	32. Seattle Day 7 / Attending

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Addison and Meredith have a nice morning.

It's 7am and Meredith wakes up before Addison and the hotel room alarm clock. They have it set to 7:05 because they wanted 5 extra minutes of sleep. Meredith reaches over to get the alarm clock and shuts it off before it sounds. She places it back down on the nightstand and turns to face her sleeping beauty. They had an amazing time last night and after they came they went straight to sleep. They're both still wearing makeup from last night and are completely bare on the bed. 

Meredith is laying on her side just admiring the view. Addison is still asleep with one hand under the pillow and one leg raised up. The sheets cover her lower body but Meredith can see all of Addison's back and one bare breast. She reaches her hand over and starts to run her fingers along her back in a delicate manner. She swirls her hand all over and slowly makes her way up to her scalp. Addison is facing her but her face is covered in her hair. Meredith moves her hand over to her face and pushes her hair to side and behind her ear. Addison looks so peaceful asleep so soundly. Meredith trails her fingers from Addison's temple to the bottom of her chin. She pulls her chin up slightly and Addison starts to slowly open her eyes.

Addison wakes up and sees the beautiful blonde watching her. She smiles wide because she loves feeling loved like this. She was dreaming but she could feel Meredith's fingers running against her back and down the side of her face. The softness of her fingers really soothes her. Meredith smiles at her once she's fully awake. 

"Good morning beautiful." Meredith says softly.

"Good morning to you, beautiful." Replies Addison all quirky. 

The atmosphere this morning is so calm and collected. Addison sits up, throws the covers to the side, and stretches at the side of the bed. Meredith just watches as she flexes her back muscles when she raises her arms to stretch. The dip from her waist to her hips attracts Meredith. She looks stunning in broad daylight. Addison stands up and turns to face Meredith. 

"Let's hop in the shower quickly." Says Addison as she lends a hand over the bed so Meredith can grab and follow.

"Okay!" Says Meredith happily. She takes Addison's hand from across the bed as she crawls over to get off from her side. Addison leads them to the bathroom and opens the door. This bathroom is different. There's only a tub, a toilet, and a double faucet. The side of the bathtub has a tray with a full array of bathing materials. Addison lets go of Meredith's hand to turn on the faucet and set it on warm. She lets the tub fill with water then shuts off the water. She grabs the bottle of bubbles and pours a great deal. She mixes her hand in the water and starts to make the water bubbly and foamy. Meredith just stands there watching her Addison set the water just for them. 

"Okay done. Come in, the water is great." Says Addison as she steps in the tub and positions herself on one side. She grabs her hair and twirls it into a bun. 

"Coming!" Says Meredith as she walks over and brings herself over the tub. She sits across from her and also twirls her hair into a bun. 

Both women rest their hands on the rim of the tub as they just watch each other in relaxing silence. The warm water helps loosen some of the soreness in their bodies. The tub water barely covers half of their breasts and Meredith stares at Addison's perky pink nipples pop up from the water. Underwater, Addison's legs almost reach the edge of the tub. Meredith legs rest on top of her and they move their legs around to feel their bodies touching. Addison leans over a little and grabs the yellow sponge. She pours some body wash on it and starts to mix it in. She then hands the sponge to Meredith and points her lips towards her legs. Meredith moves her other hand down and grabs Addison's leg and raises it up out of the water. Addison dips in lower to the water to let her leg be raised out. 

Meredith brings the sponge over to the top of her foot and rubs the sponge from her toes to her calf. She does it slowly and goes clockwise around her whole lower leg. Meredith then brings herself forward into the tub so she's closer to Addison. She brings the sponge from her knee to her upper thigh. Meredith does this all along the circumference of her leg. She stops where she'd rub up to her center and waits. She pushes herself back against the edge of the tub to do the same to the other leg. When Meredith is about to be finished with Addison's other leg, she pulls her over and turns her to sit in front of her. 

Both women are now wrapped together in the same side of the tub facing the same direction. Meredith giggles at the sudden force Addison used to turn her over. Addison rests her head around the crook in Meredith's neck and holds her from the waist. Meredith lets her head fall back on Addison's shoulder and holds on to Addison's arms. They sit there all smiley and happily, wrapped in each others arms, watching the minutes go by while they're stuck in time. Meredith tilts her head slightly and kisses Addison's cheek. Addison squeezes her tighter and says, "I love you." 

****************

"Shit, we didn't think this through!" Meredith says with her voice slightly raised. 

"What!?" Reponds Addison confused as she walks out the bathroom in a robe. 

"We only have our dresses from last night, no makeup, and no brushes or straighteners! It's the morning. What are they going to think in the hospital!" 

"Wait calm down. Let's call room service. Order some breakfast and ask them to bring stuff from the gift shop and charge it to the room. I have an emergency makeup kit in my purse so I'm set. But my color is not your shade. You can try to ask if they have anything that fits you?"

"No it's fine. Let's just get some food and clothes. I have my makeup bag in my car at the hospital. Oh, ask if they sell combs and brushes." 

Addison walks over to the nightstand and picks up the phone. She calls room service and orders breakfast and asks for a list of items from the gift shop. Meredith lays in the middle of the bed with her robe partly open. After Addison hangs up she walks over and stands directly in front of Meredith. She bends over and kisses her dirty mistress. They lock lips for a few seconds and Addison pulls back. Meredith pulls her head forward wanting more kisses. Addison smiles as she watches Meredith get flustered over her tease. She leans forward and kisses her more. She then moves back slowly and smiles at Meredith. She runs her hand from her sternum down to her lower abdomen. While she does that, the loose belt around her robe falls to the side and the robe falls open to reveal Meredith's stunningly gorgeous slim body. 

Addison walks away from Meredith's naked body before she does anything that will cause her to be late to the hospital. She goes and sits in the armchair next to the round table in the room. Meredith brings herself up to her forearms and looks at Addison with a sexy smirk. Addison is just glaring at her naked body imagining the things she could do if they had time. Oh to see that woman splayed out in silver platter would drive anyone insane. Addison can't handle it and stands back up and walks right in front of Meredith again. Meredith smiles even harder seeing Addison couldn't resist. She brings her knees up and spreads her legs to show Addison her opened core. Addison just stands there watching Meredith move around showing her that beautiful center she so loves. 

Meredith then moves her feet to the center of Addison's robe and tries to loosen her robe belt. Addison undoes her belt and let's her robe open up to show part of her naked body. She then grabs Meredith's ankles and brings her legs up and suddenly spreads he legs apart. Meredith tilts her head back and moans at her force. She closes her eyes waiting for Addison's to do the next move. And of course there's a knock on the door. Both women look discontent knowing their essentials arrived. Addison walks to the door while she closes her robe. Meredith sits up, closes her robe, and walks over to the round table. 

"Perfect timing for our food." Says Addison as she pushes the cart of their food to the table. Underneath the cart is a bag full two changes of clothes, two pairs of loafers, hair ties, combs, and a brush. Addison brings the bag out and places it to the side. She then sets the table and brings out eggs and bacon. Meredith reaches for the coffee container and two cups. Both women work around the table simultaneously like they've done this every day. After a few minutes they're sitting there eating and talking about Addison's big surgery today. It's about 9:12am and they don't have to be at the hospital until 10. Addison explains to Meredith that this surgery is the last round for her patient and she's been so strong which means this will be a success. Meredith feels proud of her talented girlfriend (?). 

**************

After breakfast Meredith grabs the bag and goes into the bathroom. Addison sits there sipping her coffee. She's gone all morning without checking her phone. She reaches down and looks for her purse. She finds it under her black dress. She pulls out her phone and turns it on. 

4 MISSED CALLS   
1 VOICEMAIL

Addison slides the notifications down to see who all called her. 

1 MISSED CALL FROM JAKE  
1 MISSED CALL FROM JAKE  
1 MISSED CALL FROM JAKE  
1 VOICEMAIL FROM JAKE  
1 MISSED CALL FROM AMELIA 

Addison blanks out. Everything around her is gone and she gets lost in her thoughts. 'Amelia told Jake. What does Jake know. Why didn't I hear this. No. This can't be happening.' Goes through Addison's mind. She unlocks her phone and opens the voicemail that Jake left. 

'Hey, I'm taking Henry and we're flying out in three hours.'

Oh fuck. His voice sounds serious. Addison's heart starts racing. What did she do. Not only is she in the same place again but this time there's more on the line. Her child. Was it really worth it, to destroy her family and marriage. Meredith walks out of the bathroom in black leggings, a purple long sleeve shirt, and brown loafers. 

"How do I look? Addison? Addison? Addison!?"

Addison is just silent, lost in space. She comes back to reality and Meredith is standing next to her dressed and worried over her. Addison looks into Meredith's eyes like something was just ripped away from her.

"Jake knows. He left. He took Henry. Amelia. I-I"

"Oh my god. Addison. Hey, hey. Are you okay? Let me check my phone." Says Meredith as she goes and tries to find her phone. She finds it in a pile next to her clothes and turns it on. 

1 MISSED CALL   
1 NEW MESSAGE

She swipes down to see the full notification.

1 MISSED CALL FROM AMELIA  
NEW MESSAGE FROM AMELIA: 'It have better been worth it' 

Shit.


	33. Seattle Day 7 / Attending Pt. 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Addison has a surgery.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> OMG SORRY GUYS! I'm really really busy with school right now that I have not had time to sit and write. This is a short chapter but I promise I have the ending in mind already. I will try to post more consecutively to give this story a full finish. Thank you for following me and this story. I really appreciate it!! Comment below if you have any insight or anything you want to share!

Addison doesn't day a word after checking her phone. She continues to sit in silence and completely shut out what Meredith is saying. 

"Addison? Addison?!" 

"Let's get our things and go. I have a surgery today." Says Addison bluntly. 

Addison gets up and grabs her dress and heels and puts them into the bag where her new clothes came from. She looks for the keys to the rental car and walks towards the door. Meredith barely catches up to her while Addison walks out of the room. Meredith doesn't say a word because she has all this guilt over her. They make it inside the elevator and start to go down. Addison is just looking at the door blankly. Meredith is trying to wonder what Addison is thinking about. I mean it must be bad because Jake left with Henry. 

*********

The whole car ride to the hospital was silent and unsettling. Meredith is sitting at the Attending's lounge table waiting for Amelia go pop in at any moment. They arrived to the hospital about 40 minutes ago. Addison already left to go see her patient. Meredith thinks about going up to the gallery to watch her but maybe it's too much at this moment. 

Addison walks in to her patients room and asks her if she's ready for her final surgery. She warns her that this one is the riskiest and that if she's ready. Addison puts on a fake smile to give her patient hope and peace. Soon some nurses and a resident take her patient away. Addison takes a different path to get to the O.R.. She can't face Amelia right now so she decides to go through the stairs to reach the room.

Addison walks into the scrub room and puts on her blue designed scrub cap and a mask. She reaches for the soap and starts to scrub. The door slowly opens and it's Amelia. "Oh great" thinks Addison. Amelia stands next to Addison waiting for her to finish scrubbing in. Addison turns off the faucet and grabs a towel to dry off. 

"Well, is there any particular reason why you're quiet?" Asks Addison in a bitchy tone. 

"Oh wow. Do you really want to start like that?"

"Look I have a surgery to do. Can't this wait?"

"Wait, yeah sure. I'll leave you to it then." Says Amelia in a sarcastic voice as she walks out the scrub room. 

Addison walks to the sliding door and steps in to the O.R.. Amelia slips into the gallery to watch Addison. She sees an empty spot and it's next to Meredith. She sits down and gives Meredith a pissed off look. Meredith just watches her and ignores her. She doesn't want to deal with her unnecessary feelings. 

Addison stands next to her patient and tell her she'll be okay as the patient falls asleep. She looks up to the gallery and makes eye contact with Meredith. She may feel like she's about to fall in a pit of despair but, Meredith can always lighten up her mood. 

************

Everything is going great mid surgery then all of the sudden the sats of her patient start to fall.

"Sats are falling." Says a nurse.

"BP is falling." Says another nurse.

"There's no bleeding inside her." Says Addison worried. Her patient is going through something with no prior problems and she can't seem to figure what's wrong. 

"Late decels on the baby." Says the resident.

"We have to open her up. This baby won't survive if the mother keeps going down. Scalpel!" Commands Addison as she walks to the end of the operating table. 

She makes an incision horizontally on her lower abdomen. There some minor bleeding but that's normal. She slices open through the layers and finally reaches the womb where the baby is. 

"V-Fib!" Announces a nurse. 

Addison quickly pulls out the baby and clips her cord. She hands the baby over to the pediatric surgeon to check. 

"Make sure she's breathing, I got to go help out the mom. Okay push one of epi. Paddles. Charger to one hundred. Clear!"

Heart rate goes up and then falls flat.

"Again, push another epi. Charge to two hundred. Clear!"

Heart rate goes up, stays constant, and falls flat again.

"Check her utero." Addison tells the resident. 

"She's not hemorrhaging." Says the resident.

"Push another epi. Charge to three hundred. Clear!"

Her heart rate goes up and falls flat again. This time the heart flatlines. She's gone. Addison takes off her surgical gown and throws it in the trash can. She pulls off her mask and scrub cap as she walks out the operating room. She walks to the stairs and feels like breaking something. 

Meredith feels shocked. Addison said this was the hardest part but it should have been fine. There was nothing wrong with her before. She stands up and tries to walks out the gallery but Amelia grabs her wrist. 

"Leave her." Says Amelia as she looks up to Meredith. 

Meredith pulls her arm out and walks away ignoring her completely. She knows Addison is in the staircase because that's where they always go. She opens the door and walks down a flight of stairs until she reaches Addison. She sees her tears fall down and give her a hug. Addison wraps her arms around Meredith. This hug helps calm her down a little. 

"Addison, I am so sorry about everything. We shouldn't have left last night. We shouldn't have done anything. I am really sorry." Says Meredith apologetically as she pulls her head back to face Addison. 

Addison grabs a strand of hair in front of Meredith's face and pulls it behind her ear. She cups her cheek and says, "Meredith, you did nothing wrong. I wouldn't want to give last night up. I love you remember that. Promise me you'll remember that?"

"I promise."

"Okay. I'm going to have to leave and I don't know what's going to happen but, we should spend some time apart until we settle on things. This doesn't mean I'm leaving you forever."

"You're leaving again. Addison. Please don't. Don't leave me." 

"I'll call you okay. I love you." Says Addison as she pulls Meredith in and kisses her lips softly. She pulls back out of Meredith's arms and walks towards the door. 

Meredith doesn't follow this time. She stays with the feeling of a broken heart. She knows Addison has to go back but, whenever she goes back they won't end up talking. 

*******

Addison is sitting at the airport in her black Prada coat with her purse. She doesn't board her plane until 7pm and it's only 6pm. She's applying her favorite red lipstick while using her little black compact mirror. When she sees Jake, she has to be stunning. She still hasn't made up what she's going to tell Jake. She doesn't know if he's going to let her come back in his life or if he's going to cut her out. She hasn't thought about Naomi or Sam or the whole practice for that matter. What has Jake told them. Addison grabs her phone and dials Jake's cell and goes straight to voicemail.


	34. Back To Los Angeles

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Addison comes back to L.A. alone.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Hey guys so this chapter is more of a foreplay between Jake and Addison. Some people may not like the straight allusion to sex so just read the first couple paragraphs and the last and skip through the middle fluff. 
> 
> This chapter and the following will all just be from Addison's life and just make references to Meredith. After this sequence then it would be Meredith focused chapters and then a couple more chapters until we reach the end! 
> 
> Hope you enjoy!

Addison boards the plane with her purse as she struts to her seat in first class. She places her purse on the side and orders a glass of red wine. The plane hasn't taken off yet and her phone is being bombarded with messages by Meredith and Amelia. She mutes her phone because she doesn't want to deal with any distractions at the moment. All she thinks about is how she's going to talk to Jake. She can't go through another messy divorce. Well Derek wasn't messy it was more hurtful and bitter but with Jake it might be messy and heart breaking. She may love Meredith but she still has a place for Jake in her heart. She still has feelings for him and part of her doesn't want to let go but, she'll end up hurting him the way she knows how, which is by cheating. She's already hurt him this trip but if she were to stay it would be worse. 

Addison loves sitting next to the window. She watches as the sun starts to fall and how night creeps up. They've been in the air for about 2 hours and are about to arrive to LAX. She hasn't told anyone she's arriving, everyone thinks she's going to arrive tomorrow night. By the time she gets home Henry would already have fallen asleep so that would give them time to talk alone. Sam and Naomi must already know what happened. Jake must've already explained it to them. But Naomi would've called her already. All these thoughts fill Addison's brain as they get nearer to L.A.. 

As soon as the plane lands, Addison pulls out her phone and books an Uber to pick her up and take her home. Getting off the plane took about 15 minutes and she starts to make her way to baggage claim. She sees her black suitcase and reaches for it from the top. Addison's phone rumbles signifying that her Uber is waiting for her outside in a red 2013 Toyota Camry. She walks out the terminal doors and sees the car. The man steps out and puts her suitcase in the back trunk. She steps in the right backseat and tells the driver she's good to go. When the car starts driving she starts thinking that she should have called a taxi instead. It seems more upscale than an Uber. She even thinks she should have called a driver to pick her up instead but, that should have been planned in advance and she did do this on a whim.

The driver starts to pull up to her road and slows his speed. This annoys Addison because she's trying to get home asap. She tells the driver if he can pick up the pace a bit. They stop at her driveway and he gets out of the car and gets her suitcase from the back. Addison steps out with that radiant fierce look. She thanks the driver and waits for him to drive off. She starts to walk up her sidewalk trailing her stilettos in a straight line which causes her hips to move up and down. She doesn't have her keys and doesn't want to pull out the spare out of it's safe place. She wants fun and action so she knocks on the door of her own house. A few seconds passes and no one opens. She knocks again and she hears the locks turning. She pulls up the handle of her suitcase and rests her left hand on it while she places her right hand on her hip and waits for Jake to open the door. 

Jake heard the first knock thinking it was a random person. If it were Addison, she would have already walked in. Then he hears another knock and feels it someone he knows then. He starts to turn the lock and cracks the door. As soon as the the door is cracked, Addison places her foot on the slit. Jake sees that black stiletto and knows he has to fully open the door. He pulls the door and sees Addison standing like she doesn't care about him knowing what she did or has done. Addison smirks at Jake's surprised look and says, "Took you long enough to open." 

She makes her way into her house and puts her suitcase on the side and her phone and purse on the front counter. She starts to take off her coat and place it on the coat hanger as Jake closes and locks the door. She walks into the kitchen, opens her cabinet, pulls out a bottle of wine, a wine glass, and pours herself a full glass of wine. She leans over the counter as she takes a sip. Jake just scoffs at her as he watches her. 

"So are you just going to drink that wine and not talk to me?" Says Jake sternly. 

Addison shrugs as she downs the rest of her wine. She pours herself some more and starts to drink it. This feels like a night she wants to get wine drunk. Jake walks over to her and takes the wine bottle from the counter and closes it. He grabs the wine glass from her hand and puts it down. They're standing so close she can feel his thigh on hers. Jake doesn't look as mad as she thought but maybe he's hiding it because Henry is here. Addison looks into his eyes and suddenly pulls him into a kiss. Jake lets Addison kiss him, it's been forever since they've done anything serious and maybe tonight she'll finally give in. Jake knows about Meredith and how she's been cheating on him but right now that has left his brain and his hormones started kicking in. 

Jake holds Addison around the hips and leans into Addison to deepen the kiss. Addison softly moans in his mouth as he closes in. She pulls her hands over his neck and tilts her head so she can slide in her tongue. Jake tightens his grip on her hips and hoists her up to the counter. Addison pulls back from their kiss and smiles at him when he does that. Jake brings his hands to the side of her thighs where he reaches the hem of her dress. He leans in for another breathless kiss as he raises her dress up. Addison hasn't had sex with Jake in weeks and at this moment all she wants to do is fuck him. Addison slides her tongue inside Jake's mouth and slightly moans at his swift movements. 

Jake moves his lips from hers to the bottom of her jawline as he leans forward. He starts to kiss along the side of Addison's neck as he reaches the sides of her thong with his fingertips. He makes his way down to her collarbone as he slides off her thong and lets it fall to the floor. Addison has one hand on the table and another on Jake's neck as he kisses all her sweet spots. She curls her toes when she feels the breeze down south when Jake takes off her thong. She moves her feet together around Jake to bring him closer into another kiss. Jake kisses her fiercely as he grabs the edge of her dress and pulls it up to let Addison's bare ass sit on the counter. Addison let's out a sigh when she feels the cold counter and Jake's hardness rub along her thigh. 

Jake pulls out of their kiss and looks at Addison with eyes of lust. He slips his right index finger into her mouth for her to suck on as he pushes her back into the counter. Addison is now laying across the counter with her center displayed for Jake. She softly bites Jake's finger when she feels him rub along her core. 

On the counter behind them Addison's phone starts to vibrate continuously. The vibration stops then starts again. It's Meredith calling her. Addison is too busy right now to even know what's happening other than Jake on top of her.


	35. Back to Los Angeles Pt. 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Addison admires the sunrise.

Addison and Jake went at it all night. They moved from the kitchen counter to the living room sofa and ended in their bedroom. They lasted into 3am and went multiple rounds. 

It's about 4:30am and Addison is still lying awake staring at her ceiling. Jake fell asleep right after they finally finished. Addison is trying to decipher what this means. This wasn't how they usually had sex. Last night was more of an angry lustful fuck and not their loving sex. Addison enjoyed it throughly and it seemed like Jake did as well but, they weren't connected. Addison thinks about her night with Meredith after the ball, that was completely in sync with each other. They felt the emotion of the other and knew when they were close. It seems like Addison and Jake have lost that rhythm. 

Addison sits up on the edge of the bed and takes off her side of the covers. She is completely bare and feels a little sore and tense. She walks into her bathroom and puts on one of her beige silk robes. She brushes her teeth, fixes her hair, and parts it in the middle. She closes the bathroom door slowly so she doesn't wake up Jake. She comes down the stairs and walks into the kitchen. She sets up a pot of coffee and waits for it to brew. She can see the night sky start to wander into dusk. She loves seeing the sun rise on the west coast. She goes over to the far left counter and picks up her phone. It's dead, she must have forgotten to charge it. She connects it to the charger in the kitchen and goes to pour herself a cup of black coffee. 

Addison opens her sliding door and steps out to her back porch. The breeze and smell of the water calm her. She knows that today things will go down between her and Jake. If he doesn't mention Seattle then she most definitely will. Addison sits on her beach chair and takes in this beautiful scene. She can see the sun start to creep up from the horizon as the sky turns into a purple pinkish color. She can still see the start above and the sunrise below. It's perfect. There's a noise next door of a sliding door opening. It's Sam, who is about to go on his morning run until he sees Addison sitting on her porch. 

"Addison? Hey!" Says Sam as he notices Addison and makes his way onto her porch to talk to her. 

"Sam!" Says Addison surprised. 

"What are you doing up so early? Wait weren't you supposed to arrive tonight?"

"I flew in last night and I just couldn't fall asleep. Were you about to go on your morning run?"

"Yeah. Well how was Seattle? How's your patient?"

"Seattle is Seattle. And sadly my patient did not make it through the final surgery. Her daughter did survive and they're monitoring her in their NICU." 

"Ohhh okay. You okay? You seem a little off."

Addison scoffs then says, "I've seen better days. But thanks for asking. Now go! I don't want to keep you from your run."

Sam chuckles as he puts on his earbuds and waves goodbye to Addison as he jogs out of her porch into the sandy beach. Addison raises one of her legs and leans back into her chair. All of the sudden she gets tired but she couldn't fall asleep in bed. She sees the sun is halfway on the oceanside edge and finishes her coffee. Henry usually wakes up around 7 to get ready for school. She looks back to her wall to check the clock and it's barely 5:13am. Addison sighs as she sits there wondering what she should do. 

Addison walks back inside and starts to clean up around the living room. She picks up some of the things they knocked over last night. She walks into the kitchen and starts to wipe down the counters. She's cleaning everything to erase the evidence of what happened. It makes it seem less real in her mind and Addison doesn't want this anymore. After she's done cleaning the kitchen she walks over to her phone and turns it on. As soon as her phone turns on she sees she has about 7 missed phone calls and 10 new messages. A mix from Meredith and Amelia. She opens the messages.

MEREDITH:

"Did you have to leave today?"

"Addison"

"Can we talk?"

"I have to talk to you."

"Addison, I love you. I want to wait for you but I don't have much time to give. Call me back."

AMELIA:

"Addison"

"Addie"

"ADDISON"

"You really left didn't you."

"Call me back!!!"

Addison slightly smiles at Amelia's messages because she thinks about them in her voice and how she'd say it. What stays in her mind is Meredith's message. She was serious about her leaving. Addison knows she's going to get with Meredith but right now her priority is her son and her situation here in L.A.. She takes her phone off the charger and runs up the stairs to hop in the shower.

********

"Hey Sweetie!" Says Addison as she walks down the stairs dressed up in a red body fitting dress. 

"Mommy!" Screams Henry as he sees his mom again since Saturday evening. 

Addison walks over to his stool by the counter and hugs him from behind. She looks up to look at Jake but he hasn't looked at her yet. 

"Are you ready for school little man?" Asks Jake looking directly into Henry's eyes completely shutting out Addison. It seems like the anger before the sex has finally reached Jake. 

"Yes!" Says Henry energetically on an early Monday morning. 

"Okay let's go. I'm taking you to school." Says Jake as he gets the keys of the counter and helps Henry grab his things. 

"Bye baby." Says Addison. 

"Mommy." Says Henry in an embarrassed voice. Addison knows he doesn't like to be called baby anymore but it's a habit. 

Jake and Henry walk out the door and Jake did not talk to her nor look at her. Maybe he can't face her after last night. That all just happened in the spur of the moment. It was completely unplanned and unprecedented. She thought they were going to fight and he must have too. She did notice Jake was already dressed and bathed which meant he used the guest bathroom since she took the bedroom bathroom. She makes herself some eggs for breakfast while she waits for Jake to come back. 

********

Addison is sitting at the table in the living room scrolling through her Instagram when she hears Jake open the door. She puts her phone down and gets ready to speak with Jake. He walks in, faces Addison but doesn't look her in the eye, and leans on the outer kitchen counter.

"You know I can't even look at you right now." Blurts out Jake. 

Addison opens her mouth to speak but gets cut off by Jake before she even says a word. 

"Like how can you just easily stroll back in and act like I didn't catch you red handed. You just waltzed in here last night expecting some type of parade. How long have you two been together? Because it clearly was something that did not happen that week. Those glances and feelings aren't just a slip, it was an ongoing affair wasn't it? What I can't recall is when it started because when I think back to all the times you went to Seattle it seemed like there was nothing there restraining you but this week it was different. Is it because you haven't been there in years? I'm trying to make up a timeline for your affair but it seems to be longer than we have even been together. So tell me this Addison, did you always love her while you decided to marry and spend the rest of your life with me? I seem to remember when you told me about your adulterous past and how it was in the past. Was that a lie? I can't even begin to explain how I feel but I dont think that will be of much use. What I really want to know is your side of the story. Because I already know part of it but I want to hear it come from you." 

"Jake. I truly did love you and expected to spend the rest of my life with you. When I married you I was determined to stay with you and love you. I didn't mean to hurt you the way I always hurt people, I really wanted things to be different. You gave me this world Jake, you gave me peace and love like no one else. You are everything I wanted. I-"

"What about Meredith?"

Addison sighs then continues to speak.

"Meredith is everything I never knew I wanted and can't live without. I learned that I love her throughout the course of a couple years and this visit was like I could breathe again. I've loved her for a long time and I did not plan this whatsoever. This didn't even start as a relationship. We had a one night stand when she was an intern which was about fifteen years ago. Over the time and the recurring visits I've had there, its grown into a semi relationship but nothing ever serious. Before this recent trip to Seattle I saw her and I knew Iloved her but I was not going to act on my feelings and neither was she. I stayed in L.A. and lost contact with her. I met you and adopted Henry and I really thought I was never going to see her again. But part of my heart was still in Seattle. When I came back I was going to stay away from her but we soon reconnected and I felt like she was my homecoming. We've both grown and matured from when we first met and everything seemed to align with her. I did not plan this Jake, believe me."

Jake turns around to hold on to the edge of the counter as he gripes on really hard. He's incredibly angry and heartbroken about Addison. 

"So you're telling me you love her and fallen out of love with me. What is your plan then? Bring her over here? Move over there? Divorce me? Or are you just telling me this so we can try to work through this because I don't think this would be fixable. I don't want to stay with someone who doesn't love me or stabbed me in the back."

"Jake, I will always have a special place in my heart for you. You were perfect for me and you are the man of my dreams. But I want to woman of my dreams. I always thought I would settle down with a man but when I'm with Meredith it feels different. I never wanted to hurt you like this and I know there's nothing I can do to fix it but I don't want to completely lose you from my life."

"I won't leave Henry, I'm his father. But what I will do is pack my things and go. I've heard enough about your major love in life and know it's my time to go. To make it easier on you I'll file the divorce and send you the papers. But you're going to break the news to the practice not me. You'll tell them the truth too. But Addison, I love you and I knew that when I first saw you in that supermarket. I pictured the end of my days with you. This is breaking me like you have no idea." Says Jake as he faces Addison. He feels brokenhearted, he grabs his keys and his satchel and makes his way to go into work. 

Addison continues to sit and thinks through what they talked about. Jake took it lightly compared to when Derek found out. She was expecting the worst but she should have known Jake isn't like that. She messed up another marriage but she hopes she did it for a good reason. She wants to believe she did not just throw her marriage away on a whim. They don't even have a next step ready. She may have jumped the gun on this one. What really boggles her is that this one is different. Derek was already out of love when she cheated but Jaks still loves her and it makes it a bigger burden than she's faced before. Addison still loves Jake but it's not enough for her to stay and pretend like nothing happened or even work through. The guilt has never been this much and now she feels like she wants to run away. She picks up her phone and calls Meredith.


	36. Seattle Attending

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Meredith thinks about Addison.

To give some recollection to your memory about where Meredith left off, here is a bit from Seattle Day 7 / Attending Pt. 2.

\-------------

"You're leaving again. Addison. Please don't. Don't leave me." 

"I'll call you okay. I love you." Says Addison as she pulls Meredith in and kisses her lips softly. She pulls back out of Meredith's arms and walks towards the door. 

Meredith doesn't follow this time. She stays with the feeling of a broken heart. She knows Addison has to go back but, whenever she goes back they won't end up talking. 

\--------------

Meredith walks back to the Attending's lounge and sits on the couch just fighting with her internal thoughts. Her heart feels like it's been shattered again. She remembers when Addison left Seattle for good and moved to L.A. and how that impacted her. She has had this attraction and love for so long but it never fully bloomed until a couple years after she left. Then again she was gone and there was no more connection between them. She had her life in L.A. and Meredith had her life with Derek. 

Derek was both theirs at one point in time but Meredith got to have the Derek that Addison never had and vice versa. He loved her so much unlike any man she's ever met. He was everything, he was her world and while Addison was around there was never a yearning for her to leave Derek completely. She did sleep with her when she was with him but that was during their tough times. Yet during that time, Addison left her a note saying I love you after she said it. She may have loved Derek but she did love Addison as well. Meredith was playing with fire during that time and she was awfully close to getting burned. 

After Addison left for a long time she and Derek had a fallout then a big fight over the course of a few years. After he came back from Washington D.C. it was great. It felt like her life was complete and she didn't feel like anyone was missing. Meredith really thought she'd live out the rest of her days with Derek but sadly he had to leave too soon. Derek's death not only impacted her, it impacted everyone around them. Addison lost a former husband and a best friend. Everyone lost someone but she lost the best parts of her when Derek died. She lost most of her compassion and ability to love the way she did. No one could ever replace him.

When Addison came back after all these years it made Meredith remember all these feelings she had shoved deep in her heart. There was anger, desperation, resentment, love, and the feeling that something that was once missing is back. Meredith really tried to ignore Addison but it's like they fell back into that rhythm they had a long time ago but this time it's different. She's free to pursue her but now Addison is in the middle. Meredith doesn't know if Derek were alive that she'd be capable of leaving him for her so that's why she thinks Addison isn't going to leave Jake. This boggles her and Addison already left. Addison has been at fault of destroying her last marriage but that took two and Derek had his fair share. But in her current situation she would be responsible for blowing it up completely. 

Jake found out about them and left with her son. Addison left her to go back to her son and speak with her husband. But Meredith doesn't want Addison to go back because she feels like she's going to get abandoned by her. All she wants is to feel whole again. She's been a strong independent woman but no one has been able to make her feel whole again except Addison. She thought that after Derek that she's done and closed for good. Addison was the reason she isn't and her coming this week and spending time with her, loving her, and sleeping with her has made her realize that she doesn't want it to end. Addison told her she doesn't know when she'll be able to be with her and Meredith wants it to be sooner rather than later. 

They never thought through what is going to happen if Addison leaves Jake. They haven't talked about who would move, or if they'd live together immediately, or just date, or anything. She starts thinking of all the things that could go wrong and she can't handle being in the dark about this. She pulls her phone out of her coat and dials Addison. The phone rings then goes to voicemail. Meredith hangs up. She decides to text her instead.

To Addison:

"Did you have to leave today?"

She puts her phone back in her pocket and tries to recollect her thoughts to go back into work. Meredith gets ready to stand up from the couch until she sees Amelia walk in the door. 

"Have you seen Addison? We were gonna talk after her surgery but she walked out."

"Yeah, she left."

"Yes I know she left but where did she go?"

"She left." Says Meredith blatantly. 

"No, you can't be serious. She isn't supposed to leave until tomorrow." 

"Well she said she had to leave now." 

"No, she's probably still in Seattle. I'm going to call her." Says Amelia as she pulls out her phone from her pocket and dials Addison. She gets voicemail and she tries again. Voicemail again. She clicks her contact and messages her. 

To Addison:

"Addison"

"Addie"

"ADDISON"

Amelia tries to call her again and reaches voicemail once more. Meredith stands up and walks towards the door before Amelia stops her. 

"Hey hey hey. Where are you going?"

"Back to work. Which you should too."

"Well your mood definitely has changed."

"You know what Amelia. It has changed since the moment you decided to get involved in something that doesn't concern you. You've actively managed to step in and cause more trouble than it was needed. You had to be nosy and stick your head in somewhere that it doesn't belong. I get that you love Addison as sister more than me but you tried to make me the enemy and the sole reason for this whole thing. You weren't there from the start. You don't know the whole story. You don't know what was going to happen if you didn't step in. I don't understand if you were trying to break us apart or her marriage but you definitely did damage on both of those things. I mean she's gone or on her way to be gone."

"Are you seriously blaming me for the destruction of her marriage or your relationship? Yes Addison is my family and you are too but this was something that should have been said from the start. Not some hidden little affair. Jake has the right to know what happened and how long it's been happening. Do you think if Jake wasn't here at all that she would have stayed with you? If anything she would have left you completely alone while she still had someone to go to. It would have hurt you both more than if he were here to find out. And for me to step in was to help Jake more than anything. He is a great devoted husband and father and should be aware of what his wife is doing and not be kept in the dark. 

Wouldn't you have wanted to know if Derek was cheating on you? What would you have done if you were in Jake's shoes but with Derek. Don't tell me you would have been fine about. You would have left him. This wasn't something that was going to be kept secret forever. You guys did a pretty good job keeping this low for years but sooner or later it was going to come to light and it happened to be now. I stepped in for the sake of the other person. I couldn't have chosen either of you because I'd be an accomplice to this affair. I've already been an accomplice when Addie cheated on Derek and I was not about to do that again. If anything this may have actually helped you Meredith. Maybe she's going to choose you but maybe not. If Jake were to not have known, I doubt she'd even be thinking about leaving him. Their happy home has been broken and I don't think they can repair it. Now you actually have a chance. Isn't that what you wanted?" 

Amelia says that with anger towards Meredith and her selfishness then walks out of the room leaving Meredith to really think about her words. 

Meredith thinks about it and knows Amelia is right. If Jake were still in L.A. this would have been a fling but she would have left her. Jake being aware and everything that's happened has actually been in favor for them to be together. It may be all bad right now but it is the only way for them to find their way together. Amelia was butting in but without her this could have not been able to work. Meredith feels like there's a shot at a future with them but she's weary about it. She tries not to think about it coming true. She has to prepare for the worst because that's what usually happens to her. She doesn't know if Addison will come back for her. She has a life, home, and family in L.A. so what would make her come here. Meredith has a life, home, and family here and she wouldn't leave from it. 

All the unknowns about their relationship seem like something may come to light that might not let them be together after all. All Meredith wants is to be with Addison. 

Meredith walks out of the lounge and goes into the hallway. Her brain is engaged in thoughts and conclusions about what's going to happen. She makes her way to the O.R. board to see what's her next surgery.


	37. Seattle Attending Pt. 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Meredith remembers.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay so for the next updates I think it would be able to upload during the weekends so stay tuned!

Meredith finishes her final surgery around 9pm. She walks out of the scrub room and walks around the hallways of the hospital. She walks along the bridge between the chief's office and the other side of the hospital. She stands by the rail and looks out the giant window wall. It's rainy and dark outside. It's not raining hard only fast sprinkling. Somehow the weather fully depicts how Meredith feels. She picks up her phone and calls Addison once more but is sent to voicemail again. She didn't think Addison would completely forget her or leave her but it's only been a few hours and it feels like she left a long time ago. 

**********

Meredith is sitting on the couch of her living room drinking some wine as she flips through the channels. She grabs her phone and texts Addison again. 

To Addison:

"Addison"

"Can we talk?"

Meredith doesn't know what Addison would be doing right now. She probably already went to sleep over there or she's probably talking with Jake about what happened here. Meredith wants to believe in Addison but she just seems very unsure. She can't show up there also because they aren't even defined yet so it would serve as no use. Being with Addison this whole week has made Meredith remember what it's like to feel loved and to have that fire again. She thinks about how good Addison is at making her wet. How Addison does that tongue roll along the inside of her opening. Or when Addison kisses all the right spots along her neck to her shoulders. Don't even get me started on the things Addison does with her fingers. Meredith wants Addison again. She picks up her phone and texts her again. 

To Addison:

"I have to talk to you."

Again Addison doesn't read or reply to the message. Meredith downs the rest of her wine and turns off the TV. She goes upstairs silently because she doesn't want to wake up her kids. It took her a while to put them down. She walks in her bedroom and goes directly into her bathroom. She feels flushed as she keeps thinking about Addison. She wishes she were here right now to help her but instead she has to do it herself. 

Meredith opens the shower door and turns on the water to warm. She slips out of her jeans and underwear and pulls off her top and bra. She steps in the shower and lets the water fall on her body as she closes her eyes and remembers the things they've done in the shower. Like when Addison arrived earlier this week. It was her second day in Seattle and she went over to her hotel room. Stepping in that shower with her was delicious. Just being able to grasp Addison's luscious curves and feel her delicate fingers inside her. Or when the water got in their lips as they made out. Or when the water flowed from their upper body down their core as the other one sucked clit. 

Meredith stands in the shower getting off to these memories. Just thinking about Addison in general is making her close. She puts one hand against the wall as she continues to pump her middle and ring finger inside herself. She closes her eyes and imagines that face of ecstasy Addison makes when she finishes. Meredith pulls her fingers out her core and starts to rub fast along her clit she can cum. She thinks about Addison's full breasts and how she enjoyed them in her lips as she moans out her name as she climaxes. She steps backwards and cleans herself. She continues to bathe normally since she came already. 

*******

Meredith lays in her empty bed thinking about all the things in her life. She knows Addison promised her to know she loves her and that she won't be gone forever but she can't help and wonder if it is. Meredith starts to feel her eyes water then Amelia opens her door. 

"Get out!" Says Meredith in a loud tone.

Amelia ignores her wish and closes the door and walks onto her bed. She crawls up next to her and sits against the frame. Meredith pulls herself up to sit up. Meredith turns and looks at Amelia. 

"I didn't think she actually left. I called and texted her a few more times throughout the day. [...] Look I'm sorry for getting involved the way I did but if we could go back in time I would do it all over again. And that may not be fair to say to you right now but that doesn't mean I don't care about you Meredith. I love you and we may not always be close enough as me and Addie, you still mean the world to me. I can't fix whatever happened between you two but I can sit here and be whoever you want me to be."

"Amelia, I don't hate you. I mean I sometimes don't like you but that's just a little. I love you too and I can see why you did what you did. But since I'm the one who was causing some of the issue, I didn't want to accept it. You were right earlier. If you hadn't stepped in we may have not had an actual shot. All I hope for now is that Addison does choose me. I don't want to wait for her when she chooses I want to know she will. I won't beg, I'll just tell her I don't have anymore time to give."

Amelia wraps her hand around Meredith as they sit in bed. 

"Well I'll let you get some rest." Says Amelia as she pulls her arm back and gets off the bed. She walks out of the room quietly and leaves Meredith alone. 

Meredith grabs her phone from the nightstand and texts Addison one last time. 

To Addison:

"Addison, I love you. I want to wait for you but I don't have much time to give. Call me back."

She puts her phone back on the nightstand and lays flat on the bed. It got pretty late but at least she doesn't have to work tomorrow. Meredith closes her eyes and falls asleep. 

*******

Amelia and Maggie left for work today and took the kids to school as they left. Meredith stayed in the kitchen cleaning the dishes. These days always feel the weirdest for her. When she's alone in the house and everyone ie gone. That's when she gets a phone call. Her stomach gets tingly as she hopes it's from Addison. She quickly grabs a hand towel and dries her hands. She picks up her phone and sees it is Addison.


	38. The Call

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Addison and Meredith engage in a phone call.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I AM SO SORRY FOR NOT BEING ABLE TO POST SOONER! School has been tough but luckily I am done!! I rarely has enough time to do things and this was not a priority but not it is! This chapter continues where we left off and the next chapter will be out by Friday!

Addison stands up from the table as her phone is dialing Meredith. Jake just left her, he really did not tolerate the unforgivable. In her mind she thought Jake would have at least tried a little harder for her to stay or do anything but instead he told her he will file for divorce. Well there comes a certain age where you don't tolerate anything. Her stomach clenches as she hears Meredith's voice on the line. 

MEREDITH: Hello?

ADDISON: Meredith

M: Addison, I've been texting you. What happened?

A: I got home last night and my phone was dead. I wanted to talk to Jake but we did not until this morning. What he told me though, it got me very weary about the future. Meredith (she sighs), what are we doing?

M: Addison Wh-

A: He is going to file for divorce. 

M: Oh... But isn't that what you wanted?

A: I thought it would be fine, but I spent so much time with him and our son in a loving home that's not broken. I still love him Meredith. I thought one divorce was enough but two?

M: So what are you saying Addison? 

(Meredith sits down on the stool in the kitchen counter. She feels her eyes to start to fill with tears. She fears what Addison is about to tell her.)

Because it sounds like you don't want to do this. 

A: Meredith, I came here for a better life. I came here to... I came here to find myself, and I did. What were we even planning to do? Are you going to come down here and live with me? Are we going to raise our children together? I own a practice here and Jake lives here. Henry needs a father around. 

M: (Silence)

A: See th-

M: Can you answer the same for me? Would we raise our children together? Would we live together? I own a hospital here. My family lives here. My children need stability after the death of their father. 

A: Mer. (Says Addison in a apologetic manner)

M: Addie. (Says Meredith in a worried tone)

A: I truly love you Meredith, I do. But did we think this through? Were we just going to jump into this headfirst and hope we make it out okay? Look, I'm sorry but- 

M: Don't finish that Addison. Don't you dare. You promised me to wait for you. And I will but I don't have all the time in the world to wait Addison. I love you. I want you. I can see myself waking up to you in the mornings. I can envision our children together getting ready for school. I can feel our bodies intertwine whenever we can because we'll be together. I can imagine looking into your eyes and saying 'I do' 

A: Meredith. (Addison smiles as she says her name as she walks out to her porch to look at the shimmering sea.)

M: I want to spend the rest of my life with you. I want to be with you and everything you come with. I want to experience your crazy, your mother's love, your full attention and love. I can't make you choose but I know you know what you want as well. 

A: Remember earlier this week when I said I love you during my sleep?

M: Yeah? Because I asked you if you meant it but then you asked me to leave.

A: Well I dreamt of us together. I dreamt I was in my bed here and I saw you staring at the ocean through my balcony. The sun rays illuminated your face while you were wearing my robe. I felt at peace just waking up to you. You came over, let the robe fall on the floor, and kissed me. You are my sunshine Meredith. I can picture you laying beside me in the morning with your cute little snoring which I don't mind by the way. I'm a heavy sleeper. But I can also see us holding hands and walking along the shoreline with our kids. I love you Meredith Grey. 

M: (Meredith smiles intensely as she thinks about Addison's words.)

A: I know what I'm going to do. I love you okay. Give me some time. Don't disappear.

M: Wha-

[Addison hangs up the phone. She doesn't want to tell Meredith what she's going to do. She wants to keep it a surprise for her.]

Addison walks back inside grabs her keys, purse, and sunglasses as she walks out the front door. She arrives at Seaside Wellness and steps into the elevator. She's about an hour late but she wasn't supposed to come back to work until tomorrow. The elevator doors open and she walks straight into Jake's office and closes the door. 

"Addison, you can't just barge in here while I'm working. I could have had a patient."

"Well you don't and this is important."

Everyone from the practice gathers in the kitchen just to watch Addison and Jake dispute and talk through the glass wall. 

Violet asks, "What's going on between them? I thought Addison was supposed to arrive tonight from Seattle?"

"She actually got here last night. I found her outside her porch this morning while I went on my morning run. She didn't look so good." Stated Sam.

"Huh, that's weird. She didn't even text me she was coming back early or tell me anything about whatever that is." Says Naomi a little surprised. 

"Well from the looks of it, it doesn't seem so good. I've never seen them like this. What exactly happened in Seattle? Jake left in the middle of the week and told us when he got there." Replies Cooper. 

"Well this don't seem like it's going to end nicely. That argument look pretty menacing. Something definitely happened out there in Seattle." Says Charlotte in her deep southern accent. 

"Well we don't know if it was about Seattle. Maybe we're jumping to conclusions a little to fast." Sam says with a calm voice.

"No Sam, something definitely happened. I know Addie. This is something big. Jake did come back before Addison." Suggests Naomi. 

Everyone continues to watch through the glass. Jake stands behind his desk and points at the glass window to direct Addison's attention towards the kitchen. Addison turns around, walks up to the glass and signals everyone in the practice to get lost. She closes the blinds and turns around to continue. 

**********

Meredith feels ecstatic but very confused about her conversation with Addison. She told her she knew what she was going to do but she didn't reveal what it is. She didn't even give her a time frame to latch on. All she knows is Addison loves her and just needs time. Her heart pounds faster just thinking about being able to live a life with Addison without any obstacles.


	39. L.A / Attending

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Addison is holding her ground.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for sticking with me guys! Will keep updating this story to the end! Tell me what you think!!

Addison walks furiously out of Jake's office and goes into her office. Everyone else is still in the kitchen watching this whole debacle. Naomi walks out of the kitchen and goes into Addison's office. She closes the door and looks at Addison laying her head down on her desk with her hands crossed over. 

"Addie?"

Addison is sobbing and looks up at Naomi with some mascara running down her cheeks. Naomi knows something grave is going on. From the looks of it, she thinks there's some irreparable damage lurking from the conversation Addison had with Jake. Naomi walks over to her desk, sits on the edge, and pulls in Addison to her abdomen. Addison grabs Naomi by the hips and cries into her lap. Naomi caresses her her head and gives Addison her moment to let it all out. 

"Addie, talk to me. What's wrong? What's happened?" Says Naomi with worry in her tone. 

Addison sniffles and sits up. She grabs some tissues from the edge of her desk and wipes off the tears from her eyes and the residue mascara on her face. She looks at Naomi in the eyes but then looks at the ground.

"Nai. I want you to not judge me when I tell you. Right now I need someone who's by my side."

"Addison I won't judge you. I'm here for you. Now tell me what's going on."

"Jake is filing for divorce." Says Addison blatantly without any explanation.

"Oh Addie. Why would he do that?" Says Naomi with sadness.

"Well...

(Addison looks up to the ceiling to keep her tears in.) 

He found out that I had an affair."

"Addison! Not again." Naomi says shocked but not surprised. 

"Wait Nai. Before you judge me again, this time was different. The affair was with Meredith Grey."

"Wait that name sound famil... Wait? Derek's mistress? Her? Addie since when have you been... No, wait?" Speaks Naomi all confused with this information.

"I know it's shocking and I've never told you about my sexuality because it was never prevalent or something I wanted to discuss. But Meredith is different."

"How long has that been going on? Did it happen on this trip?"

"Well actually no. It really started when I moved to Seattle after Derek left. But we were never a relationship but more of a no strings attached relationship. But that changed over the years after I moved here. When I would go back to consult we would be together. Until they stopped needing me in Seattle and we lost contact. Then I met Jake and he put me back together. Naomi, I still love Jake but I really love Meredith."

"Addison. Why didn't you ever tell me or talk to me about this?"

"I never said anything to you or anyone. So did she. It was always something just between us which never made it completely real. It was always this other universe when we were with each other. But Amelia found out and told Jake to come out there. He then found out and flew back here." 

"So that's why he left and why you're back a day early." 

Naomi stands up with a shocked face and walks over to the couch in Addison's office. She sits down and faces Addison. 

"Addie, what do you intend to do now?" 

Addison opens one of her drawers and pulls out a box of chocolates. She stands up and walks over to the couch and sits next to Naomi. 

*********

"Are you trying to figure out what they're talking about too?" Says Violet to Sam.

"Yes, but sadly I can't read lips." Replies Sam.

"Why don't you go talk to Jake?" 

"I don't want to get involved in something that isn't my issue. I know Naomi will talk with Addison and they will figure this out. In the mean time, I'm sure things will be fine."

"Do you really believe that Sam? Something's bound to go down in this practice."

"They've been talking for a long time. And now they're eating chocolates. This is definitely big. Enough of that. Don't you have patients?"

"Ugh Sam. I'll go." Says Violet in a playful tone and walks away. 

Sam drinks his coffee while leaning into the kitchen counter. He watches Addison and Naomi talk a little longer then goes into his office. 

******

Meredith spent all day cleaning the house. The kids are in school, the girls are at the hospital, and Addison called her hours ago. To keep her mind off of Addison, she decided to deep clean the dirty house. She started with the kitchen stove and oven. Then Meredith reorganized the kids toys and room. She then ended with her room. 

Meredith walks over to her cabinet and opens the top drawer. She has a shoebox inside and she pulls it out. Everytime she feels alone or scared she always looks at the sky but when she's home she opens this shoebox. 

Inside the shoe box is some of her mementos with Derek. Their framed sticky note, his ferry boat scrub cap, pictures, and her old cellphone with Derek's last voicemail. Meredith starts to tear up while reminiscing her life with Derek. She feels guilty loving Addison almost as much as her love for Derek. She ponders about Addison's question from earlier. What if it were her in Addison's shoes. Was she really capable of leaving Derek for Addison?

Meredith doesn't think through that question. She realizes this is just how life works. She had Derek for a time and so did Addison. She got to truly love him and build a life with him. But he's gone. Addison on the other hand was someone she's always had but was never able to think of what the relationship could be until now. Now all she pictures is living a life with Addison. 

She gathers everything and puts them back in the shoebox. She puts it back in the cabinet and picks up her phone from the bed. She has no new notifications and it's almost dinner time. She texts Maggie to bring food on the way home while she picks up the kids. 

Meredith remembers one thing she has saved from years ago. She tries to reach under the bed and pull out this box full of mail and random important papers. Inside the box is a little pink pouch that Zola stopped using. She unzips it and pulls out a black lacy thong. The thong Meredith took off of Addison's legs while they were in the car before Addison left for L.A. 

Meredith smiles as she remembers everything that happened in that car with Addison. She lays out the thong on her bed and snaps a picture of it and sends it to Addison. She types, 'Remember that car ride?'

*********

Addison is at her place sitting with Jake and Henry at the dinner table. They're eating chicken with mashed potatoes and asparagus. The dinner has been mostly silent with the exception of Henry saying random things mostly. Addison's phone buzzes.

"Ooh mommy got a text!" Says Henry enthusiastically. 

Addison reaches her phone and unlocks it. Meredith texted her a picture of a black lacy thong and a message that says, 'Remember that car ride?' She doesn't connect the dots but then remembers exactly what Meredith means. She smiles and puts the phone down. 

"Who texted you mommy?" Asks Henry genuinely interested in who texted Addison. 

"Yeah who texted you?" Says Jake with a sour tone. 

Addison darts her eyes at Jake then looks over at Henry with a smile. She says, "Just one of mommy's very close friends." Addison emphasized the word very while she said it so Jake could get the hint. 

******* 

"Goodnight sweetie." Addison whispers as she and Jake walk out of Henry's room. They walk down the stairs in total silence until they reach the kitchen. 

"It's getting pretty late and I'm tired. I'm going to go to sleep." Says Addison. 

Jake walks closer to her and puts his hand on her lower back. He pulls her in closer as his leg is in between hers. 

"Jake." Says Addison in a breathy manner. 

He slowly steps forward until Addison is leaning against the counter. They haven't kissed but the sexual tension grows intensely. Addison doesn't do anything to stop Jake or escalate things. Her mind starts to fog up as she thinks about Jake taking her again in the kitchen. 

He grabs her by the legs and puts her on top of the counter. With one hand he pulls her hair down so her neck is exposed and he can kiss it. Addison moans at the force. He starts to graze his fingertips along the side of her thighs up to the hem of her dress. He continues to slide in his fingers under her dress until he reaches her thong. They still haven't kissed or looked each other in the eyes but both have that carnal feeling to fuck. Jake starts to lower her thong down her legs and Addison feels her wetness start to soak through her thong. 

Jake continues to pull down her thong and Addison snaps out of her sexual desires. She starts to tap on Jake's upper back.

"Jake. Jake. Stop. No."

Jake steps back with his hands up in the air and leans against the kitchen sink. He looks at her in the eyes and crosses his arms. 

"We can't Jake. Not anymore. Not after today." Says Addison with a serious tone. 

"I'll get my things and go to a hotel." States Jake. 

Jake leaves the kitchen and walks up the stairs. Addison hops off the kitchen counter and pulls up her thong. She picks up her phone and starts to reply to Meredith.


	40. L.A. / Attending Pt. 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which both women participate in a much needed phone call.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Everything after this chapter will be concluding Meddison's journey. There's still a few more chapters left but now all the unanswered questions will be answered and we'll get to see what Addison and Meredith do. Will they stay together? Split? Will one of them die? (Just kidding! This isn't shondaland.) 
> 
> Anyways, thank you so much for following this story and bearing with me and the weeks of inactivity. If any of you have any burning questions or any guesses to how this will end then please share! I want to know what you guys think will happen.

Meredith is in bed ready to go to sleep. Her phone turns on and she reaches to grab it. It's a message from Addison. 

NEW MESSAGE FROM ADDISON: 'I faintly remember what happened. Maybe you can give me some clarity?'

Meredith smiles at that knowing Addison wants her even thought they're miles apart. Meredith starts to type out something as she smiles and bites her lip. She hits send and awaits Addison's response. 

********

Addison is leaning against the kitchen counter with a glass full of wine just scrolling through social media. She looks up and sees Jake coming down with a suitcase and a duffel bag. They lock eyes but she can feel the fury and pain through his eyes. Jake can see that Addison is obviously not sober but just tipsy. 

"I'm going to stay at a hotel for now. I'll be here every day so we can put Henry to sleep so he doesn't know what's going on. He shouldn't deal with this yet." Says Jake with remorse. 

"Go then. Walk away. Leave. This is my house. If anything I shouldn't let you back in ever again after what you said today." Replies Addison harshly. 

Jaks stares at her and notices how her chest is puffed up and her heart is almost beating out her. He takes his things and walks out the door recollecting the things they both said in that office today. 

Addison gripes on the the edge of the countertop and bends her head down as she cries with anger and sadness. Her heart was broken today with Jake's words and her own. She didn't know she could go that far in hurting someone she loves. Of course she's been a cheater but hurting someone with their own deepest pain and using it against them is low especially for a Forbes-Montgomery. They both reached an all time low today and that's something they will never recover from. 

Addison wipes her tears with her hand and downs the remainder of the wine in her glass. She reaches for the bottle and goes up stairs. Midway through the stairs her phone vibrates and she remembers she texted Meredith. Right now she wants to feel something other than this insufferable feeling she has. She goes into her room and reads the message. 

NEW MESSAGE FROM MEREDITH: 'I can definitely help you remember that night through the phone.'

Addison smiles at the message and her feelings of desire start to overtake her mind from before. She walks into her closet and gets out of her clothes and puts on her pink striped men's button up shirt. She gets into her bed with her white socks, red lacy thong, no bra, and her wide open shirt. She dials Meredith and waits for her to pick up. 

**********

M: Hello? 

A: Hey. (Says Addison seductively as she brings up her knees.)

M: Hey. (Says Meredith seductively as she turns on her TV so no one can hear her.)

A: So I can't seem to remember where those panties came from. Can you help me remember? 

M: Why of course. If you can recall, we were in my car in the basement of an empty parking garage of a hotel. 

A: Oh yeah. And you climbed out of your seat and got on top of me as you lowered my seat all the way back.

(Addison starts to rub her finger along her fair pink hard nipple thinking about that specific night.)

M: You took off my top as I started undoing your buttons. Your bra was hooked from the front and I undid that immediately. It left your gorgeous. Pink. Round. Breasts. Exposed. To my delight. 

(Meredith starts to hum thinking about Addison's breasts in her hands and lips. She slides her right hand into her panties to feel her wetness start to form.)

A: Mmmmmm. You got into the foot space and gently slid your tongue along the side of my breasts and sucked in my nipple with that experienced tongue of yours.

(Addison sucks on her fingers. She grabs her own nipple and and rubs on it releasing a soft moan.)

M: Addison, I'm so wet for you.

A: Mmmm.

M: I want to be able to grab you right now and kiss your neck.

(Addison slides her wet finger down her abdomen into her soaking wet thong. She slowly slips in her middle finger into her slick center as she hears Meredith tell her everything she wants to do to her.)

M: I want to be able to lick those gorgeous big breasts of yours. 

A: (Slightly higher pitched.) Oh yeah.

M: I want to be able to trail my mouth down your flat stomach and reach the hem of your thong. 

A: (In a breathy voice.) Keep going. 

(Meredith rubs her clit with her long fingers as she starts imagining taking Addison right now.)

M: I want to be able to tear that underwear off your body. 

A: Ohhh.

M: I want to be able to slide my finger down your wet pussy.

A: Oh Meredith. 

(Addison is rubbing her clit in a circular motion to get her orgasm thinking of all the things Meredith can do to her.)

M: I want to be able to... to lower my head down. Open my mouth. Suck on your clit. Slide my tongue around your wetness. And smoothly slide a finger insi-i... 

A & M: Fuckkk

(Both women came at the same time thinking of the other one fucking them. Addison came on her thong and feels her juices start to drip off the side. Meredith continues to slip her finger inside herself and rubs her cum around the inside of her thighs.)

M: Oh how I fucking wish I could be there to lick you clean Addie. 

A: I'd love to see you rip off my wet thong and run your tongue along my cum. 

M: Oh Addison. You don't know how much I miss your touch. How much I miss your body. How much I miss you. 

(The tone switched from sensual to longing. Addison snapped out of her desire and started to think about missing Meredith.)

A: Meredith, give me a little more time. Please. I promise it will be worth it.

M: Addison, what are you waiting for. I miss you. I want you. I need you. 

A: And I love you. 

M: Why can't you tell me what's happened and what you intend to do. 

A: I have to go. Same time tomorrow?

M: Ugh fine. It better be video call tomorrow. 

A: I love you Meredith Grey.

M: I love you Addison Forbes-montgomorey. 

CALL ENDS. 

Both women smile and lay back in bed having finished to each others voices. Meredith feels like she's waiting for a very important result. Addison doesn't reveal what she intends to do. Addison can't help but feel ecstatic about her plans with Meredith. 

Meredith stands up and goes into her bathroom to get cleaned up. Addison can't fall asleep yet so she slides her finger down again and gently starts to pump inside herself. Addison continues for a few more minutes until she starts to doze off.


	41. ???? / Attending

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Addison finally decides on what to do.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ×××× = flashback

Addison stares at the blue waters overlooking Seattle. She leans on the ledge of the ferry boat imagining the near future. She smiles as she looks down at the depths of the sea. Usually her memories on a ferryboat are gloomy and disdaining but today will be different. Today is the day she will finally get to see Meredith after a month of her departure from Seattle. It's been hell of a month for her but now it will soon be over. 

Addison drives along the street and pulls up to a driveway. The neighborhood is pretty stretched out with only a few houses on the same street. She gets out of the car and walks up the driveway. The house is very modern and sleek with a dark exterior. A man greets her and opens the door for her as they go inside. 

********

"I just finished rounds and I don't have a surgery until noon. It's barely 7:30." Says Meredith in a gloomy tone. 

"Well I don't have a surgery until 1 o'clock so I got you beat. Want to go get coffee at the cart?" Replies Amelia.

"You just read my mind." Says Meredith.

********

Meredith and Amelia are sitting at a table outside drinking their morning coffee and admiring the sunny day with the fresh breeze. Meredith has no idea Addison is even here today. She has no idea for what's in store for her later today. 

"So, what are you doing tonight?" Asks Amelia. 

"Nothing. Why?"

"I thought we could go get dinner. I want to talk to you about something important." 

"Why can't you just tell me here?"

"Nope. Can't do. But we're going to go to this new restaurant downtown that I've been dying to go. But now I gotta run because I'm getting paged." Amelia says as she stands up and starts to walk away.

"Amelia!" Shouts Meredith.

"I'll drive! You better get dressed up!" Shouts Amelia from far away as she continues to walk away. 

Meredith sits there alone at the table. She tries to think of what Amelia wants to talk to her about but she has no clue. The days for her started getting longer as she desires to be with Addison in person again. They may text and call each other all the time but it's not the same. She knows Addison chose her but they still haven't finalized their plan for the future. Meredith knows for a fact she does not want to move to L.A. and Addison doesn't want to move back to Seattle. They haven't even agreed on what to do together much less live together. 

*******

Addison follows the man inside. The inside has an open floor plan across the whole kitchen, living room, dining room, and the back sliding doors that look out to the backyard and pool. They walk into the kitchen where there's some papers spread across the white marble countertop with a black wooden length. She sits on the black stool next to the man. 

"So all that's left with the finalization process is for you to sign these documents and the house will be yours." Says the Realtor. 

"Thank you." Replies Addison. 

The man directs her to the places where she's supposed to sign. She finishes signing the papers and he lends out his hand for a handshake. They both smile but Addison's eyes sparkle. He congratulates her for the purchase and hands her the keys to her new home. They walk to the door and she let's him out and thanks him again. She closes the door and leans back against the door. She smiles so hard and finally feels happy thinking about showing Meredith their place. 

The house comes with a fully elaborate pool and a full backyard accompanied with a nice lavish patio area. There's a total of 5 bedrooms and 3.5 bathrooms. A fully equipped kitchen with furniture around the living room, dining room, and extra space. There's 3 extra rooms for use of an office, playroom, and anything else they choose. There's a double indoor garage. The whole house is 2 floors with a basement. The basement is like an extra living room with a small kitchen and long counter that can be used as a bar. The whole house is big enough for her and Henry as well as Meredith and her kids. 

Meredith has talked with her saying how much of mess her house is and how Amelia and Maggie rotate living there and anyone else who needs a home. Addison kept that in mind when she was looking for houses in Seattle. Now today is also special because it's the day Addison is going to propose to Meredith. She has some decorations in the back of her car and the ring is inside her purse. She already called Amelia to tell her and ask for her help to bring Meredith here without knowing. 

While still leaning against the front door, Addison starts to replay what happened throughout this month, starting with her conversation with Jake. 

×××××××

The elevator doors open and Addison walks straight into Jake's office and closes the door. 

"Addison, you can't just barge in here while I'm working. I could have had a patient." Jake said in a rude manner. 

"Well you don't and this is important." Addison stated.

"Well what is it then? You sure didn't say anything at home if you just came here to continue talking. I thought we decided what was going to happen."

"We decided. Ha. How funny. Jake you decided that you were going to file for a divorce but you didn't even fight for us or anything. You just walked away like all the men in my life. There was not real argument about me or what we should do. You just walked away and went to work!" Said Addison loudly.

"Wow! Now you want me to give a fuck. If we can remember clearly, you were having an affair with someone else for a longer period of time compared to the time I've known you! Shouldn't that say something. There's not much I can do or say about that."

"Really! Nothing! There's nothing you can say?! So it's just this and you are ready to walk away in an instant. It seems to me like I didn't mean much to you." 

Jake stands up furiously from his chair and slams his hands against the desk while staring at Addison. 

"Mean much! You are my world Addison! I wanted to grow old with you! Raise Henry with you! Love you forever! But no, I didn't mean much to you! You instead went on that frivolous adventure with that woman! What did you expect from me Addison?!"

Jake stares at Addison and then looks over her shoulder and sees the rest of the practice staring at them. He points at the glass window and Addison turns around. She walks up to the glass and signals everyone in the practice to get lost. She closes the blinds and turns around to continue.

"I expected you to care. I expec-"

"How can I when you're being an adulteress bitch!! The only thing you know how to do exceptionally well! The thing you always do in a relationship! I told you from the start Addison, I told you I wouldn't tolerate this. You said you wouldn't do it. I guess you had to act like a conniving snake and still cheat!"

"Wow. I can see where all the pent up anger was. You finally said what you've been wanting to get off your chest." 

Addison starts to let the tears fall from her eyes. She starts to cry and stands there. She sniffles and looks up at Jake enraged. 

"So I've clearly met the worst side of you today. And now I'll tell you how the rest is going to go. We're going to get divorced and all my assets will still be mine since we never signed to share them. I will fight for full custody of my son. Henry will still need you but you'll be the one who comes to see him not the other way around."

"And what about her? The woman who wrecked our marriage. See I never stood a chance. If I would have faught for you this time, I would have lost and you know that. So I guess you just needed some reassurance or a backup plan in case you don't end up with her." 

"Meredith is what I never knew was missing from my life. I've loved her longer but it was suppressed and kept inside me for years. I loved you openly and truthfully. Everything I said was true because I never imagined going back. Eventually it was bound to happen but I never asked for it. Tell me this, if your old wife was still alive and came to you well and clean would you have gone back to her? Because the way you speak of her sometimes sounds like you yearn that she was still alive."

"That is not the same and you know it."

"It's not but ironically it is."

"You still don't have it figured out with her either way. You'll see this as a mistake later."

"I won't. And I did figure it out on the car ride here. I'm going to ask her to marry me and move to Seattle with her." 

Jake stays silent. He turns around and looks at the window. Tears fall from his eyes and Addison walks out the door. Addison just witnessed her own heart get broken by the man who put it back together.

×××××××

Addison stands upright from leaning on the door. She opens it and goes toward her car. She opens the trunk and grabs as many paper bags she can carry. She walks inside and places the bags on her counter. She goes back outside grabs the last paper bag and closes the trunk. She opens the back seat and grabs a cardboard box. She walks back inside and closes the door. 

She places everything down and starts to pull out the items for her proposal. She bought candles, rose petals, wine, balloons, and a long carpet. She bought all of this to decorate the new house so she can propose to Meredith here tonight. She still has hours until her shift is over but she can't help herself and start early. 

********

Meredith just finished her last surgery at 5:30pm. Today was one of those slow days where there's not much work. She texts Amelia that she just got done and she's going home. Amelia responded with, 'okay I'll be out in 30 so I'll go pick you up at the house.'

Meredith knows not to overcomplicate things with Amelia and just let her have her ways. She grabs her things from the attending's lounge and walks down the stairs instead of the elevator. She walks past the place where Amelia caught her and Addison over a month ago. 

She gets home and says hi to her kids. Maggie had her day off today and stayed with the kids. Meredith stomach grumbles and she wants to eat but Amelia might get a little mad. She goes into the kitchen and eats a slice a bread with peanut butter to cool her appetite. 

She goes upstairs and goes into her room. She has no idea of how dressed up she should get for this dinner. She did buy this cute white and black striped blouse that goes great with her black blazer. She puts on a pair of gray dress plants and her black pumps. She touches up her makeup and applies light pink lip gloss. She pulls her hair out of the hair tie and combs through it. Amelia won't get here in another 15 minutes which gives her time to straighten her hair. 

After she's done she looks at herself through her full length mirror. Meredith feels so beautiful and she quickly grabs her phone and snaps a picture of herself and sends it to Addison. She quickly replies with heart emojis and asks her where she's going dressed up so nicely. Meredith replies with, 'Dinner with Amelia.'

Addison doesn't respond but Amelia texts her that she's here and waiting for her outside. She grabs her purse and walks out. 

"Wow! Looking good Mer! What's the occasion?" Asks Maggie.

"Dinner with Amelia." Replies Meredith with a smile not knowing that she'll be seeing Addison. 

Her kids come out and hug her and tell her goodbye as she walks out. She gets into the car and notices Amelia isn't even dressed.

"Why aren't you dressed?" Asks Meredith.

"I just got done with my shift but I have my clothes in the back so I can change when we get there."

"Okay. Where is this place anyways?"

"Let's listen to some music!" Says Amelia not answering her question. She starts to drive off and take Meredith to her soon to be fiance. 

*******

Addison finished decorating the living room area about an hour ago. She has some of her things here but not all. Most of her clothes and shoes are here since she sent that earlier this week. She had time to freshen up and get dressed. She's wearing her pink pant suit with a black top. She's left her hair down and curled. 

She made sure the master bedroom has a nice comforter and clean sheets. She placed some candles on the the side tables and a bottle of wine next to 2 glasses. She placed some rose petals over the firm white bed. She gets a text from Amelia saying they're on their way. It'll take them about 15 minutes to get here and Addison finds herself very nervous about this. She's almost as nervous as the day she announced her plan at the practice.

××××××

Everyone at the practice is sitting around the conference room table looking a bit confused on why they're having a meeting. Everyone knows that Addison and Jake have gotten a divorce but no one other than Naomi and Sam know about Meredith. Jake left the practice a week ago. Addison is standing at the front looking nervously at Naomi wondering if she's jumping the gun. Naomi smiles at her to calm her down. 

"Well I'm sure you guys are wondering why I pulled this meeting today. You all know about the divorce and I love how everyone has been professional about it. It's been a great help having support from you all but anyways there's more pressing matters to attend. 

I will be leaving the practice. I know I technically own the practice since I bought it out years ago and when we changed the name. But the thing is that this was never really my dream. Yes it was amazing and something I've loved being apart of, but we all know this was Sam and Naomi's dream not mine. They started this practice to create a difference. 

Guys, you two built something special, and when I got here it created some clash between the way you did things and the way I did things. You will now own the practice completely. Money is not an obstacle but a blessing now. You can renovate the fourth floor like how you've always dreamt of. You can recreate this practice to your visionary dreams. 

Surgery is the thing I love most and feel most alive doing. I want to continue being a surgeon and that's why I'm moving to Seattle and working as head of the Neonatal department at Grey-Sloan Memorial. And I will be able to be with the woman I love. Meredith Grey. I just wanted to let you know of what has happened and what will happen. You all have been my rock and family and I will always hold you dear to my heart. I will always visit but now it's time for me to move on to other things."

Everyone at the table clapped for Addison and accepted her decision. Everyone was supportive of her and gave her their blessings. Of course Cooper asked her how it was like to be girl on girl while Charlotte slapped his shoulder. Violet told Addison she loved becoming friends with her despite their past and that she will greatly miss her. Naomi and Sam knew about this but told Addison they support her in whatever she chooses to do. 

Addison felt that chapter nearing it's end. She doesn't leave for Seattle until next week so she has time to gather her things and pass down everything from the practice. 

×××××××

Addison walks out of the room and comes down the mahogany stairs into the living room. She walks into the open floor and looks at her arrangements of flowers with a path of rose petals over a black carpet. She has candles along both sides of the carpet. At the end of the trail is a huge heart made out of pink, white, and red balloons. On the ground is a the form of a heart made with rose petals. Everything is set in place for her to pop the question. 

She told Amelia and Bailey about this since she had to let them know she'll be coming back to Seattle. Bailey was ecstatic to know Addison was returning and Amelia was happy for her. She wants to make this proposal intimate for her and Meredith but she also wants to announce it to the world. This is going to be the first night of their future. Every minute that passes Addison can feel the tense sensation rise in her stomach. 

She sees a car pull up to the driveway and she knows it's Meredith with Amelia. It's time.

******

"Amelia what are we doing here? I thought we were going to dinner." Asks Meredith 

"Um well I lied but you need to get out." Amelia blurts out. 

"What? Why?" Says Meredith confused deeply. 

"Just get out and walk through that door." 

Meredith gets out the car and as soon as she closes the door Amelia drives out of the driveway. Then everything starts to hit her at once. Amelia has been acting strangely today. Addison has non stop been texting her. She knows Addison would have put Amelia up for something like this. She feels butterflies start to form in her stomach. She walks up to the door and she can see some light coming from inside. She places her hand on the sterling silver doorknob and opens the door.


	42. The Proposal

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Addison proposes to Meredith.

Addison is standing across the front door with a bouquet of red roses and the ring in her pocket. Her stomach is going insane just thinking about the second Meredith opens that door. 

The doorknob slightly turns. Addison's heart starts beating so hard it's about to jump out of her chest. 

The door finally opens and Meredith gasps as she's genuinely shocked to see Addison and the decor. Addison's eyes water as she witnesses the love of her life look into her eyes. 

"Oh Addison." Says Meredith, trying not to cry. 

Addison holds out her right hand to signal Meredith to come towards her. Meredith closes the front door and walks slowly to Addison. She steps over the red roses on the black long carpet leading the way to Addison. She admires the way Addison did all of this just for her. The candles all around the open space makes Addison radiate. All the lights are off but the candles illuminate Meredith as she walks towards her. 

Meredith reaches her hand out and Addison firmly grasps it and pulls her into her arms. They divulge into a deep loving kiss. Addison's empty hand lays on her lower back while the other hand still holds the bouquet. Meredith places both her hands over Addison's shoulders and clutches them together. Addison leans her body forward since she is the taller one of the two. Meredith leans backwards with Addison's motion and continues to intensify their loving kiss by sliding her tongue into Addison's precious lips. Addison leads them to stand straight again and pulls away from their embrace. 

Without talking Addison gives her the bouquet and Meredith grabs them and smells the roses. She smiles at Addison with true happiness and joy. They continue to have their moment in love within the rose heart on the floor. Addison breaks their loving stare and cups Meredith's face with her right hand. She pulls her in for another quick kiss and pulls away again and breathes in. The knots in her stomach grow larger by the second as she still hasn't popped the question. 

She looks at Meredith and breathes again. She opens her mouth ready to give Meredith her loving speech and propose to her. 

"Meredith. We met under difficult circumstances but that didn't stop us from getting here. The nights we shared in our younger years were parts of me that I never shared with anyone. Those isolated hours felt like an actual reality compared to my miserable life then. I never let myself divulge into this knowing that this could be something real. The thought of loving you scared me intensely and I tend to blow things up with people who try to love me. But you... you were always different. Not because you're a woman but because you understand me and love me. 

The way you admitted your love for me and told me was brave and I'm sorry for not being strong enough then. I wasted so much time not being with you when we had the chance. But fate or life or whatever you call it brought us back. I never imagined in all these years away from you that I'd be here tonight with you. I've told you this already and others but it's true. You are the thing I never knew was missing from my life but now that I've found it, it's something that I can't live without. 

Meredith I love you so much like you have no idea. While you stayed here waiting for me, I couldn't even go through this without questioning myself thinking I've made a mistake. In reality, the mistake was not doing this fast enough. My fear about us caused me to question everything. I wanted to settle and remain settled even if it meant that I couldn't be with you. While I still am slightly mad at Amelia, you and I both know this could have never happened if it weren't for her. 

But what kills me is that since we kept this secret for so long it also made it imaginary and an alternate universe. We never really allowed ourselves to vision us together. I really wish someone caught us years ago so we would have had more time but alas we're here now.

[Addison gets down on one knee and pulls the ring box out of her pocket. Meredith tears continue to fall as she looks into Addison's watery eyes.]

Meredith Grey, I have gotten to know you since you started your residency at Seattle Grace and watch you become an award winning surgeon at Grey-Sloan. You've witnessed pain and trauma over and over again yet you stand right back up and continue to fight. These years have hardened you up but they've also made you fearless, courageous, brave, and fierce. I want to be able to love you unconditionally for the rest of my life. I can happily say I want to live with you for the rest of my life without a seed of doubt. So I ask you this Meredith Grey. 

[Addison opens the box and pulls out an elegant flashy diamond engagement ring. She grabs Meredith's left hand and places the ring on the tip of her ring finger and looks back up at her.]

Will you make me the happiest woman alive and marry me?"

"Yes Addison! Yes!!" Yells out Meredith full of joy. 

Addison slides the ring down her finger and stands up. Meredith this time rapidly pulls her into a kiss and parts her lips with her tongue. Addison places the box back into her pocket and and grabs Meredith by the hips and slides her tongue inside Meredith's mouth. Their tongue participate in an eloquent dance as they continue to kiss. This kiss is everything that makes them, them. They break apart for a second and Meredith embraces Addison for a hug. Meredith places her lips by Addison's ear as she prepares herself to speak.

"Addison I love you so much. I've loved you for so long as well. You make me happy. You value me. You give me strength and encouragement. You see me as a partner and a colleague rather than looking down upon me and I value that. I love your bravery and strength knowing the struggles and obstacles you had to go through to even be here with me today. I promise to love and cherish you for the rest of our lives. I love you Addison Montgomery." 

Addison pulls back from their hug and cups her cheek. She leans in for a simple kiss. Meredith kisses her back but this time with a more elusive meaning. Addison starts to get turned on by Meredith's deeper kiss. She cups her other cheek and walks with her forward. Meredith's back leans against the kitchen countertop as she walks backwards. She places the bouquet on the stool next to them. The kiss starts going further as Addison moves her delicate lips from hers to the edge of her jawline over the crook of her neck. Those kisses left them breathless and Meredith knows she wants more. 

Meredith lets go of Addison's lower and upper back and places her hands on the edge of the counter to hoist herself up. She couldn't get up completely but Addison slips her thigh in between her legs to sustain her halfway. Addison slowly moves her hands along the curve of her hips to the back of her thighs. Her lips trail down her neck and reach the hem of her shirt at her neck. Addison pulls back and looks into Meredith's eyes as they exchange their lustful looks. Addison pushes her up to the counter as Meredith helps by putting some of her weight on her hands. 

The counter is pretty tall and Addison is level with Meredith's upper abdomen. Meredith pulls off her black blazer and throws it across the room. Addison grabs the bottom of her shirt and pulls it up as Meredith takes it off. She drops her shirt on the ground. Addison kisses her stomach and slides her lips across her soft core. Meredith holds her head with one hand as she enjoys Addison's sweet touch. Then Addison bites her lower abdomen and sucks on it to leave a nice mark. 

Addison's finger massages Meredith's calves as she continues to kiss and give hickeys to her stomach. She slides her fingers down to help Meredith out of her heels. The heels drop to the floor as they continue in the kitchen. Addison slowly starts to trail the side of her legs all the way up to the hem of her black slacks. Addison lowers her lips to meet with her zipper. She unbuttons it and lowers the zipper down. Meredith raises her lower body off the counter for a few seconds as Addison fiercely rips off her pants and throws them back. 

Addison places her hand on Meredith's abdomen and pushes her back fully on the counter. 

"Oh." Meredith breathes out as her body touches the cold marble.

Meredith decided to wear a nice little pink thong and Addison goes crazy over it. She bends her head to kiss Meredith's abdomen and lowers her lips dangerously low. Her fingers wrap up the sides of her thong and she slowly glides it down her smooth legs. 

"Oh I missed you." Says Addison in a breathy voice as the vibrations of her words makes Meredith wetter. 

Addison holds on to her thong and places it in her pocket. She brings her hand up to her lips and sucks on her index finger. She then gently runs her finger down her slick folds through her opening and puts her finger back her mouth. Meredith moans at the sensation of feeling Addison again. She grabs Addison's long luscious hair which is all over her stomach and places it all on one side. She then holds on to her head with one hand as Addison moves closer to her wet center. 

Addison painfully slowly moves her lips from her pubic area down to the start of her folds. She then glides her tongue at the start and slides down slowly gathering Meredith's wetness as she tugs onto her scalp and moans loudly knowing no one else is here. Addison then brings her tongue back into her mouth to savor Meredith's taste. 

"Mmmm. How I've missed your sweet taste." Says Addison in her seductive breathy voice against Meredith's clit. 

Meredith moans out louder feeling Addison suck and pull around her clit and folds. Addison takes things further by grabbing Meredith's legs and putting them on her shoulders. Her whole center is opened at her face and Meredith holds on to the top of her scalp. 

"Oh Addisonnnn." Moans out Meredith out of pleasure. 

Addison digs her face into Meredith's slickness. She starts to gently and swiftly move her tongue in and out of her opening as she grabs on to her thighs. Meredith just lays on the counter with one hand inside her mouth and the other on the top of Addison's head. Addison slightly rocks her face forward and pushes her thighs forward to follow her form. Just by Addison's tongue, Meredith can feel herself about to come undone. 

"Do you want to cum for me baby." Asks Addison while inside her sweet folds as she tucks and pulls with her mouth. 

"Mhmmm." Moans out Meredith. 

Addison then grabs her thighs and pulls them down to stretch Meredith's legs apart for her pleasure. 

"Ohhh." Says Meredith over that use of force Addison did to spread her legs.

Addison continues to eat out her fiance. She has both of her hands on her inner thighs and her thumbs have her folds stretched out so she has better visibility at her opening. Her center is so clear and Addison licks and slips her tongue in her. She rolls her tongue together and pushes it inside Meredith's opening. 

"Ohhhhh Addison!" Yells out Meredith feeling Addison's tongue inside her. She pulls her head deeper down and feels Addison go in deeper. 

Meredith continues to moan intensely and Addison pulls her thumbs closer. She turns her hands inward where the tips of her other fingers are along her upper folds and clit while her thumbs still hold her lower folds open. Addison then pulls out her tongue and licks her from her opening up to her clit. Meredith pants knowing Addison is about to make her cum. Addison then trails her tongue with a zig zag motion from her clit down to her opening pushes her tongue back inside her. 

Meredith moans out Addison's name. Addison smiles feeling Meredith's pleasure. She let's go of one hand holding her inner thigh and starts to rub swift and gentle circles on her clit. 

"Ohhh yess." 

She starts to pick up the pace as she continues to suck all of her wetness into her lips. She then lets go of the other side and brings her hand under her lips to slide in a finger into Addison's opening. Meredith's hips buckle letting Addison know she's close. 

Addison then moves her lips upward and dives her tongue into the inside of her folds. The tip of her tongue touches her bud and she starts to move her tongue up and down hitting the bud each time. Meredith starts to continuously moan and scream out Addison's name. Addison then slides in another finger and raises her pace on her fingers that are running circles along her clit. 

"Ohhh Addisonnn. Addie... I'm coming. Ohhhh."

Meredith tugs on her head with both hands as she starts to cum into Addison's lips. Addison feels her clenching walls on her fingers and continues to slip them in and out, milking her orgasm. Her fingers get coated with her finish as it starts to overflow and drip down the side of her hand. She stops running circles along her clit and brings her lips down to her very slick opening. Addison opens her mouth wide and sucks up the cum from Meredith's core. She looks up and places her wer fingers into her mouth to swallow Meredith's sweet finish. 

Addison then puts her hands back on her inner thighs to spread her legs down so she can lick her clean. She rolls her tongue inside and sucks on any remaining wetness. Meredith softly moans as she came down from her high but still feeling good as Addison sucks her dry. Addison moves her tongue all around her center and sucks at her opening once more. 

Addison lets go of her inner thighs and stands up straight. Meredith stares at her eyes with a peace from just coming in her mouth. Addison lends out a hand to raise Meredith up to her. She grabs onto her hand and sits up with her bare ass on the counter. Addison wraps her hands on Meredith's waist as she looks up to Meredith's eyes. The counter is too tall for Addison to kiss Meredith. Meredith moves her hands along Addison's hair and locks eyes with her throughout. 

Meredith remembers she never took off her bra and brings her hands behind her to unhook it. She places her bra on the counter and smiles at Addison in a peaceful silence. Addison grabs her by the thighs again and pulls her down so she can stand with her. Meredith kisses Addison's neck and tugs on the bottom of her earlobe. 

"How come you always get me naked first." Asks Meredith seductively.

"Because I want to devour you. And you know there's a bed."

"Oh I know there's a bed. I just needed you now... on this counter. We still haven't even finished. You're still fully clothed."

"That won't be a problem then." Says Addison all smiley and sensually. 

Meredith pulls Addison into a kiss. Addison's shakes her legs and steps out of her heels to be lower to Meredith. Meredith sucks on Addison's tongue as she moves her hands inside her pink blazer so it falls off Addison's body. The blazer falls on the floor and Meredith pulls out of that hot kiss. She places her hands inside Addison's pink pants and pulls out her shirt. Addison raises her hands to let Meredith take off her shirt. Meredith takes off Addison's shirt and throws it into the kitchen. It lands on the clean stove and they laugh. 

"Here let's go to the bed." Says Addison as she grabs Meredith's arm and leads her to the stairs.

The stairs are mahogany steps that almost seem like planks coming out of the wall. The only support up the steps is the wall because the other side has no railings. 

Meredith lets go of Addison's hand and hugs her from behind as they walk slowly to the stairs. Addison reaches the first step but Meredith quickly slides in her hand into her pants and inside her very wet core.

"Ohh you're so wet for me Addie." Says Meredith into Addison's ear from behind. 

Addison moans and tries to take a step but Meredith slides her fingers in deeper. Addison then realizes Meredith wants to take her on the staircase and that makes Addison even more wet for her.


	43. The Proposal Pt. 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Addison finds delight on the stairs.

LAST CHAPTER

'Meredith lets go of Addison's hand and hugs her from behind as they walk slowly to the stairs. Addison reaches the first step but Meredith quickly slides in her hand into her pants and inside her very wet core.

"Ohh you're so wet for me Addie." Says Meredith into Addison's ear from behind.

Addison moans and tries to take a step but Meredith slides her fingers in deeper. Addison then realizes Meredith wants to take her on the staircase and that makes Addison even more wet for her.'

//////////

"Mmmm." Moans out Addison as she feels Meredith's slim fingers rub and dip into her dripping cunt. 

Meredith then slowly slides out her fingers from her pants and moves both her hands to Addison's hips. She grabs on to her pants and starts to slide them down. Meredith starts to bend down as she pulls Addison's pants down. The faint touch of Meredith's lips on Addison's back makes her moan. Meredith's lips trail her lower back down to her hips then her lower back thigh all the way down to her calf. Addison steps out of her pants leaving her only in her intimate apperal. Meredith gently comes up as she strokes Addison's soft silky body with her fingers. 

Meredith whispers into the side of Addison's neck and says, "climb up the stairs, turn around, sit on the steps, and display yourself for me." 

Addison bites her lip because of Meredith's command. She loves it when Meredith takes the lead, it turns her on immensely. She slowly steps up one stair at a time until she's halfway along the staircase. She turns around and makes direct eye contact with Meredith's lustful eyes. She then slowly leans back and bends down on the steps. Her ass sits on a step and her legs are on different steps below her. She rests her forearms on the steps above her and bends her head back. She arches her back as she bends her legs to let Meredith watch and admire her body. 

Meredith gets down on her knees and climbs up the stairs on all fours. She nears Addison's long toned legs and Addison spreads them apart for Meredith. Meredith climbs up and trails her lips on the inside of her legs up to the inside of her upper thigh. She brings her hands above Addison's legs and grabs the sides of her thong. She slowly pulls them down faintly watching Addison's wetness still connect with the inside of her thong.

Meredith grabs one of Addison's legs and pushes it up. While she moves her leg up, with her other hand she lowers one side of the thong so it comes off one leg at a time. She grabs the other leg and does the same. Meredith then takes the wet thong and hangs it on one of the steps as display. Addison has both her legs spread out on on the step right below her ass. Meredith then climbs up a few more steps to be face to face with Addison's slick center. 

She gets closer and sticks out her tongue at Addison's spread out opening. She can see her wetness seeping out and with the tip of her tongue she scoops up a little. She raises her head up with Addison's wetness dangling from her tongue as she stares directly into Addison's eyes. Addison moans loudly and bends her head back feeling every tease Meredith is doing. 

Meredith brings in her tongue back into her mouth and the strand of her wetness snaps and lands on her chin. She wipes it off with the side of her hand. She lowers her head again and starts to climb up higher. She plants kisses right above her clit and runs her lips up her delicious body. She reaches Addison's belly button and encircles it with her tongue. She then glides her wet tongue from the center of her stomach to the center of her chest. Meredith's abdomen is resting on Addison's pelvis and Addison moans with every slight friction her clit gets. 

Meredith brings her upper body up and grabs Addison by her upper back so they're level. Addison wraps her legs around Meredith's waist as she grabs the back of her head firmly. Meredith runs her hands along Addison's defined back and unhooks her bra in one motion. Her bra starts to slide down her arms and Meredith lowers her head slightly to press kisses on her fiance's neck. Addison sighs deeply feeling her lips on her neck. Meredith picks the delicate spot on Addison's neck and starts to suck softly as the vibrations of Addison's moans go through her lips.

Meredith brings her hands from Addison's back to her shoulder blades and pulls the bra down her shoulders. The bra then slips down her biceps down to her wrists as Meredith creates a hickey on her neck. Meredith brings her head back and pulls the bra off of Addison's hands and throws it back. They hear it land on the couch and smile. Addison diverges their attention and squeezes her legs tighter around Meredith's waist and lets out a small moan. Meredith moves her head to the other side of Addison's neck and moves her hands back along her waist. 

Meredith's fingers run along the side of her hips back into her lower back and down until she grabs as much of Addison's ass that her hands can hold. Meredith pulls her in closer as Addison's clit is directly touching her abdomen. Addison moans and brings her head back as she moves her hips up and down to get her throbbing clit touched the way she needs. Meredith comes out of the crook of her neck and looks her in the eye. Their eyes sparkle and their foreheads rest on each others. Addison parts her lips to kiss Meredith and their lips touch but Addison's mouth remains open in an 'O' shape as she moans out loudly. 

"You fucking tease." Says Addison into Meredith's lips as she feels Meredith's index and middle finger inside her aching pussy. 

Meredith loves to tease Addison and making her beg for her touch. It makes her feel fully dominant and in control. She moves her fingers in as deep as they can go and Addison's arches back. Meredith continues to push and pull her fingers inside Addison. She kisses her collarbone as Addison has her head tilted as far back as she can go. Meredith lowers herself down one step so she can suck on Addison's pink hard nipples. 

"Ohh Meredith." Moans out Addison. 

Meredith circles the tip of her breast with her tongue. She grasps the firm nipple with her mouth and starts to suck on it softly. She switches the pace of her fingers and starts to go faster. Addison can feel herself almost unravel to Meredith's touch. Meredith sucks on her breast really hard as she tilts her head back and lets go watching her breast jiggle. She tilts her head back and moves onto the other breast. Instead of sucking she grabs her perky nipple softly with her teeth. The slight pain makes Addison call out her name. 

Meredith continues to move her fingers inside her and adds her thumb to rub circles on her clit. Addison bites her lip, moans, and quickly grabs Meredith's head out of her breasts to pulls her up into a deep kiss. Addison slides her tongue in forcefully and Meredith sucks on it. She changes pace again and goes faster. Addison moans into her lips as they continue to kiss. 

Addison opens her mouth into Meredith's and says, "Make me cum Meredith."

Meredith slides her tongue into Addison's opened mouth as she moves her hand that was sustaining her back onto her breast. She pinches her nipple as she changes her motion from in and out to a circular pattern. Addison screams as she feels her orgasm approaching. Meredith fully grabs Addison's boob as she bends her wrist and pushes her fingers in deeper and curls them inside her. 

"I'm coming!" Screams out Addison as Meredith curls her fingers inside her, hitting her g-spot everytime. 

Meredith smiles into Addisons lips feeling her finish run along her fingers and slide down her hand. Addison moans through her climax then starts to breathe heavily after coming undone. Meredith pulls out her cum covered hand and runs it along Addison's abdomen leaving a trail of cum. Addison relaxes her wrapped legs and places them back down on the steps. Meredith pulls her lips away and lowers herself to lick Addison's finish from her abdomen. Addison leans her head back and lets out a breathy sigh. 

Meredith licks her abdomen clean then leans back on her knees over a step. Addison brings her head forward and smiles at Meredith. 

"Now we can go to the bedroom." Says Meredith teasingly as she smirks. 

Meredith stands up grabs Addison by the hand to help her up. Addison leads the way up the stairs into a long wide hallway. They turn right and go all the way down the hall and turn again down a smaller hall until they reach the last door. Addison opens the door and shows Meredith the decorated room. Meredith smiles staring at the rose petals on the bed, wine on the table, and candles along the sides of the room. 

Meredith walks over to the front of the bed then turns around and jumps backwards into the bed. Addison giggles and closes the door. She walks to the table and pours wine for the both of them. Meredith lays on the bed and plays with the rose petals. 

"How does this look?" Asks Meredith jokingly with rose petals covering her nipples and pussy. 

"Like a dessert I can't wait to savor and devour." Says Addison all smiley as she walks over to the bed with the wine glasses. She sits on the bed with her legs crossed and Meredith sits up to drink her wine. She pulls her knees up and leans her on them. 

"So, I didn't have time to fully internalize this house until now." States Meredith as she takes a sip of wine. 

Addison places her hand on Meredith's knee and looks at her with love. 

"I bought this house for us. Meredith when I came up here, I came for everything. For you and your whole life. I know we didn't discuss things and this may have been way to impulsive but I really wanted to surprise you."

"Addison, I-"

"I'm so sorry if it's too much to just impose on you. You don't have to move in right away or anything. I just want you to know that when you're ready that I want us to be a family together. I want you by my side for the rest of our lives."

"Addison. I was going to say I love it. I love you. Of course I'll move in with you. We just have to get my kids used to us together and then we can move in. Now tell me what happened down there."

"Lets not focus on that just yet. Let's keep this night just about you and me and the fact that we're getting married." 

Addison downs the rest of her wine and places her empty glass down on the floor. Addison starts to crawl up the bed into Meredith's closed legs and pulls them apart as Meredith quickly drinks the rest of her wine. Meredith falls back on the bed and places her empty wine glass on the nightstand beside her. 

Addison spreads Meredith's legs slowly as she stands on her knees. Meredith rapidly moves her legs up and wraps them on Addison's waist and exerts her leg force to bring Addison down to the bed as she flips them over. 

"Oh you want to be in charge." Says Addison turned on by Meredith's willingness to top her.

"Watching you orgasm by my touch is marvelously thrilling." Says Meredith as she stands on her knees over Addison's long slender body.


	44. The Proposal Pt. 3

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which both women find solace in each others embrace.

LAST CHAPTER 

'Addison spreads Meredith's legs slowly as she stands on her knees. Meredith rapidly moves her legs up and wraps them on Addison's waist and exerts her leg force to bring Addison down to the bed as she flips them over.

"Oh you want to be in charge." Says Addison turned on by Meredith's willingness to top her.

"Watching you orgasm by my touch is marvelously thrilling." Says Meredith as she stands on her knees over Addison's long slender body.'

///////////

Addison smiles and brings her hands up above her head. Meredith lowers herself down and presses a soft kiss on her lips. Addison grabs the back of her head and kisses Meredith back. They stay interlocking their lips for a moment. Meredith pulls out and looks down into Addison's beautiful eyes. 

"That smile means the world to me Addie." Says Meredith while cupping her cheek and softly caressing her face with her thumb. 

Addison smiles even harder and holds Meredith's hand over her face. Meredith moves her hand from cupping Addison's face and slides it down her neck. She brings both hands to touch her shoulders. She lowers herself and kisses Addison behind the ear. Meredith then stands back on her knees and looks at Addison with a mischievous smile. Addison bites her lip seeing Meredith fully bare and looking at her. 

Meredith raises her right leg above Addison's leg. She then grabs Addison's other leg and pulls it up to her hip. Meredith turns her hips slightly and stops as soon as she hears Addison moan. She knows she found the perfect spot for their clits to touch. 

Addison brings her hands down and holds Meredith by the waist. Meredith starts to rock her hips back and forth feeling every movement at her core. Addison feels the pleasure and moans at every maneuver of Meredith's hips. Meredith leans forward and moves her hips in a clockwise direction and moans loudly. She feels every shift inside her and feels her climax coming.

Addison starts to rock her hips along with Meredith and that causes them both to yell out a moan. Meredith tilts her head back and moans louder as she feels her climax approaching. Addison brings a hand from Meredith's waist down and uses it to sustain herself to sit up. Both women now are faced directly in front of each other as they move their hips in unison. Addison knows she's about to orgasm because her breathing gets shorter and her moans get longer. 

Addison grabs Meredith's head and pulls her in for another kiss. Meredith moans into her mouth and rests her hands on Addison's shoulder. Meredith shifts her hips in the opposite direction and Addison screams. 

"Mer... Meredithhh. I'm going... I'mmm-"

Meredith pushed Addison back down into bed and positions herself directly on top of her. She starts moving her hips faster and adds a little motion with her fingers. Addison calls out for her name as she orgasms. Meredith moans out loudly as she comes with Addison. She continues to rub against Addison and intertwine their juices together. They come down of their high and just stare at each other. Meredith stops moving and falls on to the bed next to Addison. 

They both look up at the ceiling as they pant. Addison reaches for Meredith's hand and holds it. Meredith shifts her body a little closer and leans her head against Addison's shoulder. They both take this brief second of time to just lay there and be Addie and Mer. 

"I love you." Says Meredith. 

"I love you." Says Addison. 

Meredith lets go of Addison's hand and lays on her side to just graze upon Addison's beautiful body. Addison still has that smile across her face and turns her head to face her. Meredith kisses her forehead and moves some of her hair behind her ear. Addison lays on her side and pulls in Meredith so they can cuddle. Their legs wrap around each other while Meredith rests her head by Addison's collarbone. Addison rests her chin over Meredith's head as both their arms holds the other one. 

Grrrrrrrr. 

Both women giggle at Meredith's stomach rumbling. 

"I forgot to tell you. Amelia said we were going to dinner, which means I haven't had food yet, and I'm hungry." Says Meredith shyly.

Addison moves her head back to look at Meredith. "Oh honey, I couldn't eat until you accepted my proposal. I'm starving too." 

Both women laugh loudly. Addison breaks apart from their embrace and sits up. She gets off the bed and opens the door to their walk-in closet. Meredith looks amazed at the closet and gets off the bed quickly. Addison goes in all the way and slides one of the mirror doors and pulls out a black robe and throws it on the bench in the middle of the closet. Meredith comes behind her and closes the door so they can see each other through the mirror. Addison pulls Meredith around her and wraps her hands on her from behind. 

They look at each other through the mirror and smile. Meredith turns them around and pushes Addison against the mirror door. She kisses her neck and softly moves her lips down to her breast. She sucks on her nipple and tugs on it with her tongue. Her hands roam around her hips and ass. Meredith then runs her fingers along her hips and without notice slides in two fingers inside Addison. 

"Ohhh!" Moans out Addison out of surprise. 

Meredith pushes her fingers inside and twists them around. Addison digs her nails into Meredith's back as Meredith continues to suck on her nipple and use her other hand to play with the other boob. Meredith pushes her hand as far in as she can and curls her fingers while inside and Addison yells out her name. Just hearing Addison scream for her intoxicates Meredith. 

Meredith slips out her fingers and uses their wetness to play with Addison's nipples. She starts to bend down and spread Addison's legs open. She gets on her knees and digs her face into Addison's wet center. Addison turns her head back as she holds onto Meredith's head for support. Meredith slides her tongue into Addison's folds and raises one of her hands to hold onto one of Addison's breasts. She pushes her tongue inside Addison's opening and squeezes her boob. Addison comes faster this time because she's a little tired from going at it constantly with Meredith. 

Meredith sticks out her tongue to catch Addison's cum. She sucks the remainder from her opening and kisses her bottom lips like if they were her actual lips. Addison is breathing heavily and Meredith stands up to meet her face. They kiss passionately like there is nothing left in this world. Meredith walks backwards and looks at Addison in a trance. 

"You're perfect Addison. Don't cover yourself. The house is ours. Let's run around naked!" Says Meredith whole heartedly. 

"I love you so much." Replies Addison. 

Addison comes out of the closet and Meredith follows. They go down the stairs and giggle as they see all their clothes in random places around the open space. Addison bends forward to grab her thong from the staircase and Meredith spanks her. Addison turns around and looks at Meredith very surprised. 

"Did you just spank me?" Asks Addison. 

Meredith lowers herself one step and grabs Addison's ass really hard and spanks it again. She leans forward and whispers in her ear, "I just did and I'll do it again."

Addison feels really hot about that and turns around and continues to go down the steps. They reach the kitchen and Addison opens the fridge. 

"So I did make sure to pack the fridge and pantry since I'll be staying here. Is there anything you're craving?" Asks Addison. 

"Oh there's a lot of things I crave." Replies Meredith seductively while looking into Addison's clear eyes. 

"Not now. I'm hungry. But after the meal I may want to have some dessert." Says Addison as she walks towards Meredith and pushes her leg between Meredith's legs. 

Meredith grabs Addison's hips and pulls her in closer as they connect their lips and begin to makeout. Their makeout session starts to get hotter by the second then Meredith's stomach rumbles again. They break apart and laugh. Addison turns around and opens the door to their walk-in pantry. Meredith walks in and looks shocked.

"Woah." Says Meredith.

"Well I didn't know what you like but I have it stocked with many options." Says Addison. 

Meredith walks to the end of the pantry and finds several hooks with aprons and gloves. She grabs a red apron and walks up to Addison.

"If you're going to cook me food, I need you to wear this for me." Says Meredith with a smirk. 

Meredith gives the apron to Addison and watches her put it on. Addison ties the knot behind her back and does a little spin to show Meredith. 

"How do I look?" Asks Addison giggly.

"Hot as fuck." Replies Meredith while she bites her lip looking at her fiance's body. 

*********

*1:03am*

Meredith's head is tilted back resting on the top of the sofa in the living room. Her moans echo through the open floor space as she runs her fingers along Addison's scalp. Addison is kneeling on the ground with her face buried deep between Meredith's legs. Meredith sandwiches Addison's head feeling her climax approach. Addison digs her fingers into the crease of Meredith's hips and thigh. 

"Oh fuck. Oh fuckk! Addison." Screams Meredith as she orgasms.

*2:21am* 

Both women are in the basement laying side by side on the sectional sofa in the pit of the living room area. Meredith runs her hand through the curve of Addison's hips up to her underarms feeling every inch of her. Addison is supporting her head up on one of her hands while her elbow is on the sofa. Her other hand is holding the side of Meredith's face while her thumb slowly strokes her cheek up and down. They look at each in total silence just allowing their love to finally be open and connected.

Meredith grabs Addison by the waist and pushes her down so she can lay on her back. Meredith is laying above her other arm staring directly to Addison's beautiful eyes. Still no words between them. Meredith moves her hand from her waist down her hips and in between her legs. She runs her fingers swiftly along her folds up to her toned abdomen and rests her hand on her breast. Addison doesn't feel lust over Meredith's strokes she just feels loved by her lover. Addison briefly remembers when Meredith stroked her body years ago in an on-call room. That same connection is present now but finally there's no repercussions with it. 

*3:49am*

Addison is laying on the left side of their king sized bed with a firm mattress. Meredith is resting her head below Addison's breasts. She has her legs wrapped up with Addison's legs and her arm wrapped around her waist. Addison gently strokes her fingers along Meredith's smooth back. They're both breathless. Just a few moments ago Addison was sitting up and resting her head on the headboard of the bed. Meredith was sitting directly in front of her between her legs as both women looked at the same direction. Addison was kissing and tugging the skin on Meredith's neck. 

Meredith had her eyes closed and was completely submissive to Addison's touch. Addison was latching on to Meredith's breast with her left hand. Her right hand had two fingers slipped inside Meredith's wet core and her thumb was rubbing along her clit and inside her folds. Meredith moaned so hard feeling Addison this way. She clung to the back of Addison's head with her arm above her own head. Addison took the pace painfully slow making Meredith beg for her. 

Meredith was literally on the verge of her climax and Addison was doing everything possible to keep her from it. Meredith clenched her stomach and and tilted her head back onto Addison's shoulder with her eyes completely shut. Addison knew she was pushing it and drastically speed up her pace causing Meredith to come almost instantly. Addison kept her fingers inside Meredith but both of them relaxed in their embrace completely. Addison lifted her head up from Meredith's neck and saw the relief on Meredith's face. 

Meredith got out of their embrace and went to go clean herself in the bathroom. Addison lowered herself down and rested her head on the pillow on the left side of the bed. Meredith came back and wrapped herself in Addison's body. Addison reached for the lamp next to her and turned it off. The room went pitch black and the only noise was Meredith's snores. Addison smiled in the darkness and closed her eyes exhausted from the continuous hours of passionate sex between them. 

*9:17am*

The sun rays start to rise in the room and hit Addison's face. She wakes up dazed and confused feeling Meredith's body missing from the bed. She looks up and smiles seeing her beautiful fiance by the window. Meredith is standing in front of the huge window facing the backyard and pool. She's holding a cup of coffee and wearing Addison's embroidered robe fully opened. She turns around and places the mug on the table and looks into Addison eyes. She lets the robe fall off her body and gets into bed. 

"Good morning gorgeous." Says Meredith softly as she slips into the covers and watches Addison slowly wake up. 

"Good morning sunshine." Replies Addison with a huge smile that she can't wipe off.

"You looked so peaceful asleep that I didn't want to wake you."

"Well at least I woke up to an amazing view."

Meredith leans in a kisses her in the lips gently. Addison parts her lips to allow entrance to Meredith's tongue. She moans into her lips as Meredith slides in her long fingers inside her. They've had morning sex before but it usually is before something bad happens to them. Today it's so calming and relaxing knowing that they both get to wake up like this whenever for as long as they like. Meredith hasn't been this happy since Derek. Addison doesn't feel the void he left, she over exceeds it. The love is so present and radiant between them. 

"I love you, Addison."

"I love you, Meredith." 

Addison moans out as she orgasms to Meredith's touch. Meredith slips out her fingers and sucks on Addison's taste. She looks back into Addison's piercing eyes and pulls her in to her chest as they wrap their bodies. 

"I feel very Deja Vu in this moment." States Addison.

"Really?" Asks Meredith. 

"Yeah I do. I feel like this has happened before." 

Addison shrugs and closes her eyes to get another hour of sleep in Meredith's embrace. They stayed up until late hours of the night and are still tired. Both women fall asleep again and stay wrapped in each others warm soft bodies.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The Deja Vu is the dream Addison had in Chapter 21 if you guys wondered.


	45. Lawyers, Divorce, and Court Pt. 1

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Addison speaks with her lawyers.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As you guys can see I've updated the chapter count. As of this chapter there's only 3 left! Thank you for riding along this ride!!

It's been three months since Addison proposed and it has been a splendid time. Meredith and Addison have settled on a date for the wedding and it will be in four months. Now they don't want to have a huge event since this wont be the first time in front of a judge. Addison has been there twice and Meredith once, neither of them want to make it a big deal. Instead they decided to have someone who is ordained come to their new house and hold a small reception with their close friends. They did decide to have an extravagant honeymoon all around Europe which was Meredith's idea. 

But of course an issue arises for the pair. Jake. 

Addison and Jake have not finalized the divorce proceedings yet because they haven't settled around Henry's arrangements. Addison has been spending so much money on her lawyers and Jake keeps rebutting and countering every idea. 

*******

Addison is wearing her glasses reading through the paper work her lawyers have sent her. She's sitting in her home office just reading line after line while in a call with her lawyers. She hired not one but two because she wants this to end her way. She initially started with one lawyer and expected everything to be resolved but she did not forsee Jake disputing this. Addison runs her hand in her hair and bites on her pen. The tension is burning in her and the anger keeps building up. 

Meredith is downstairs with the kids. She moved in about a month ago and everything has been going smoothly. Bailey and Henry have been getting along well too which had worried Meredith. They've accepted the fact that they are stepbrothers and Zola has really gotten along with Henry as well. Zola and Ellis share a room but Henry and Bailey don't. Addison and Meredith didn't want to push this new environment onto them so they decided that they should have separate rooms. But all their worries go to rest seeing the boys have sleepovers with each other almost every night. 

Meredith sits on the kitchen stool sipping on her coffee as she watches the boys play video games on the TV while Zola is playing on her iPad. Ellis is playing with her dolls around the kids on the couch and Meredith smiles seeing them all just coexist with no barriers. This gives her stability and sanity. She's felt utterly useless to Addison about Jake. She feels guilty for being the cause to this and Addison tries to dissuade her but it doesn't work. 

The briefings with the lawyers have been happening at least once every two days for the past two weeks. It used to be once every two weeks ever since Addison moved to Seattle but Jake keeps making it more difficult for her. The other day Meredith casually stood by the office hearing Addison on the phone with Jake. They kept arguing about how Henry should have shared custody but Addison doesn't want shared custody she wants full custody. Lately their own relationship has been rocky. Addison is easily agitated and they haven't had sex for the past two weeks which makes sense. 

Meredith suggested to Addison to take shared custody but Addison glared into her eyes and loudly stated that she fought to have Henry for a long time and will not let go slightly. Addison apologized to Meredith and they made up with shower sex. But that was a while ago.

Meredith continues to drink her coffee and wonders if she should check on Addison. The kids already ate and have about an hour until bedtime. She stands up and places her mug in the sink. She walks into the living room then turns into a wide hallway. She nears the office door and can hear Addison's voice with her lawyers. She places her ear on the door to check if it's a good time to check in. 

Addison has her feet propped up on the desk with her green pj bottoms and yellow fuzzy socks. She leans back on her rolling chair and listens to her lawyers.

"Look Addison, Jake's lawyer said that this is their last attempt to come into resolution over this matter. Now if you accept their proposal then everything is finalized now and this can be put behind you." Says Lawyer #1. 

"But seeing you do not want any type of shared custody, then you would have to decline. But good news is that you can finalize the divorce since you have already established all your other assets. Downside is that you would need to go to court and fight for custody." Continues lawyer #2. 

"So he's backed me into a corner is what both of you are saying. Huh. I expected him to settle with our offer but I guess he wants to take the hard way. You can call his lawyer back and tell him I'll see him in court." Replies Addison with her tiredness lingering around her voice. 

"Okay but you do know that court will have to take place in California since Henry's adoption took place in California and he did file for divorce in California." Says lawyer #1. 

"So when would that take place?" Asks Addison. 

"Best case scenario would be in less than a month but sometimes it could be longer. The divorce papers can be done by the end of the week. As soon as we submit our information then we can have a court date. Be prepared for 3 to 5 weeks from now." Says lawyer #2. 

"Okay. You guys get back to me if they decide to pull anything last minute. Thank you and good night." Says Addison as she finally ends the call and sighs out. 

Meredith turns the doorknob and walks inside. Addison turns her head back and smiles. Meredith gives her a faint smile and sits on the edge of the desk. She looks at Addison's eyes of despair and exhaustion. She rests her hand on Addison's thigh and waits for her to speak. 

"So good news is that I will finally be divorced, again, by the end of the week... Bad news is that I'm going to court to fight for custody in a month... In L.A." 

"Oh Addie." Says Meredith with sorrow as she rubs her hand on Addison's thigh. She feels for Addison right now and feels partly to blame. 

Addison looks up to the ceiling to keep her tears from falling. Meredith scoots closer to her and grabs her hand. Addison looks down into her eyes and gives her a worn out smile. Meredith can see Addison's weariness and wants to do everything possible to help her. She only feels helpless by not being able to provide for her fiance. 

Addison pulls her hand back and brings her legs down from the desk. She stands up and stretches her arms out and yawns. Meredith watches her and Addison starts to walk away. Meredith yanks her arm and pulls her back in front of her. She wraps her hand around Addison's neck and lowers her down to engage in a kiss. This was a quick loving kiss and Meredith shifts her head back to pull back from their kiss. Addison wants more but she's too tired for sex so she pulls in Meredith and kisses her. 

Meredith whimpers feeling Addison's tongue roam around the inside of her mouth. She sucks on Addison's tongue and cups both of her cheeks with her hands as Addison leans them back. Meredith's back almost touches the desk until...

"Hey!" Both women shout simultaneously as they break from their hot kiss and face the door. 

Henry and Bailey shot them with three nerf darts. Only one landed on the back of Meredith's head and caught their attention. They both ran away in separate directions. Addison turned her face to smile at Meredith with joy. She opened her bottom drawer and pulled out her nerf gun and extra darts. 

Addison ran out the door and into the living room. The girls were giggling on the couch watching Addison search through the kitchen. Meredith walks out the office and catches a glimpse of Henry crawling into an empty box by the door. She smiles and winks at him to keep his location secret. 

"Zola honey, you're a smart girl. Tell me where the boys went." Asks Addison while resting her nerf gun on her shoulder. 

"I dunno." Replies Zola all giggly as she shrugs. 

Meredith chuckles and Addison winks at her. There's laughter coming from the walk-in pantry and she opens the door. She tip toes inside and sees Bailey's toe hidden behind a shelf. She starts shooting and Bailey shoots back as he comes out of his spot. Bailey sprints out and Addison jogs out behind him. 

Henry pops out and starts shooting at Addison. Addison moves her hands around and tries to shield herself. She continues to walk forward and Bailey emerges and starts shooting at her too.

"I yield! I give up! Uncle, uncle!" Yells Addison as she places the toy gun on the floor and lifts her hands over her head. 

Bailey and Henry high five each other and walk up to Addison. Addison grabs Bailey by the waist and picks him up slightly and starts to rapidly walk away from Henry. 

"I caught him! You lost!" Says Addison as she walks with Bailey and gently throws him onto the couch next to the girls who are actively watching this match. 

Meredith runs to the kitchen and picks up Addison's nerf gun and signals Henry. They run towards Addison and start shooting. Addison bends down and ducks her head. 

"Okay okay okay! I give up! You won!" Shouts Addison. 

"Yeah!" Screams Meredith as she high fives Henry and Bailey when he runs over to her. 

"Okay now it's time to get ready for bed!" Says Addison as she stands up. 

The kids growl and sigh because they do not want to go to sleep. Meredith and Addison bring them together and they all walk up the stairs to their rooms. 

********

Addison lays on her side of the bed scrolling through Instagram waiting for Meredith to come out of the restroom. Meredith comes out and turns off the lights and gets into the covers. Addison turns off her phone and connects it to her charger. She turns over and starts to doze off. Meredith turns over and shifts a little to spoon Addison. She moves Addison's hair out of her face and rests her head by her neck. 

"I love you baby. You'll get through this. I'm here for you." Whispers Meredith. 

Addison turns around and pulls in Meredith into her embrace. She kisses her forehead and cups her cheek. She moves the strand of hair in front of her face to behind her ear and pulls Meredith's face up to see her. 

"I love you too baby. I know we haven't done it too. I promise you we will. Thank you for your patience. And please stop feeling guilty. This is not your fault. I chose you and I knew this was bound to happen. This is just a setback okay." Whispers Addison. 

Meredith smiles and angles her head into Addison's neck and wraps her hands around her waist. They stay connected and fall asleep almost instantly due to their exhaustion. Although things may be a little hard, the communication is there, and the love outshines everything else.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I honestly know nothing about law so I tried my best with the legal side of this chapter. I will research more to make then next part more realistic for this!
> 
> So after this story concludes I have other MerAdd stories and content! There will be a another series continuing this AU with simple one-shots of their life together! It will only be a couple chapters and I will take recommendations for any settings you guys want to see between them. 
> 
> I also have another one-shot (possibly two) over the bomb episode in Grey's season 2! Thanks for reading and I enjoy any feedback you have!!


	46. Lawyers, Divorce, and Court Pt. 2

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which Addison and Jake speak.

****Addison POV*****

You and Henry get out of the Uber and walk up to your house on the shore. You open the door and Henry runs upstairs to his room. The whole flight Henry would not talk to you. He was finally admitting his hidden resentment for you. He told you that he hated you and wished everything went back to normal. That hurt you so much knowing that you've broken your own nice happy home. This time was different with the infidelity because Jake still loved you and you did too. Your life seemed complete and happy but it was not enough and that guilt eats you alive knowing it causes Henry pain. You knew Henry missed Jake and it stung when you called him. 

"Hello?" Jake responds a little surprised.

"Hey. Um. I'm calling because Henry... Hm. Henry needs his father right now. I was wonde-"

"I'll go pick him up. I'll be there in 20 minutes."

Jake ends the call before you can even say what's on your mind. Your lawyers thought it was a good idea for Henry to stay with his father a couple days while you were in L.A. 

You hear the knocking downstairs but you don't make the effort to open the door. Jake opens the door and calls out for you. You're sitting in front of Henry's door with tears falling down your face. You face Henry's door and Jake bends down next you and places a hand on your shoulder. That small feeling of affection breaks you and you lunge into his arms and start to cry. Jake knows you're breaking right now and tries to stand up with you in his arms. 

You both walk together into your room and he lets you sit down on the bed. He stands by the balcony and leans his body on the closed balcony door. He watches you as you compose yourself a little so you both can talk. 

"Addison." He calls out with the caring tone that you fell in love with. 

"Jake. I just. I can't. I don't. Just take Henry. He needs you right now. I've hurt him and you and right now is not the best time to argue or say anything." You reply.

Jake comes over to the bed and sits next to you with some distance between you both because he respects your decision whether he likes it or not. 

"I wasn't going to argue or anything. I just want to see how you're doing. It's been a couple of months." Jake tells you. 

"How did we get here?" You ask.

"I believe I should be asking you that question." He says with a smile and you let out a small laugh. 

You both don't go into court until two days from now. You wouldn't give up full custody because you want Henry to grow up in a family surrounded by love. Henry doesn't understand it yet but maybe he'll forgive you in the future but you've done the most damage to his childhood and all Jake is trying to do is be a good father. Yes you faught for Henry and decided to do it alone or together and Jake helped you. He fathered him and raised him with you. You knew what you were doing to him was unfair but you can't really set the fog in your mind straight. 

You compose yourself and stand up. You signal Jake towards Henry's door and he goes over to his room.

"Henry buddy it's me. Open the door." Jake says into the door.

Henry opens the door and hugs Jake. Jake turns to look at you with a forgiving look and bends down to Henry. 

"Hey don't be sad. I'm here okay. Now let's go get your things because you'll be staying with daddy for a little." 

Henry smiles and runs downstairs. Jake's stands up and looks at you while you just stare at your shoes. He lends out his hand and you grab it out of instinct. You both walk down and Henry is wearing his backpack and standing next to his superhero suitcase. You pull back your hand before Henry sees it. 

Jake grabs Henry's hand and walks him to you and tells him to tell you goodbye. 

Henry hugs your waist and says, "bye mommy." You place your hands on his head and bend down to place a kiss on his forehead. 

"Behave yourself okay. Be a good little boy and have fun." You tell him trying to fight back tears. 

He smiles at you and runs to Jake who's by the door. Jake opens the door and leads him out. He pops his head back in and waves goodbye as he closes the door. 

You know you caused yourself this pain but you didn't expect it to hurt this much. He was only going to be gone a few days. But you know you're going to fight for his future against his dad. He did adopt Henry as well and you know you just can't take that away. You worry for court but remember all the tips and advice Arizona gave you from her experience.

You suddenly feel all the desperation and loneliness hit you and all you think about is drowning your sorrows in wine. You go into your kitchen and open the cabinet full of wine. Before you pull one down you call Meredith instead. 

******

M: Addison.

A: I need you Mer. I know I shouldn't have forced you to stay. But I need you now more then ever. 

M: Addis-

A: I love you and I think I'm making a wrong decision by being here. I'm ruining Henry's life. 

M: Ad-

A: I'm so sorry Meredith about everything. For putting you in this situation too. For not being open earlier. For letting things get out of hand before stopping it.

M: ADDISON!

A: What?!

M: Open the front door! It's locked!

You quickly hang up the call and open the front door. And there she is. The woman you decided to finally love. Then everything clears in your brain and you pull her in by her collar into a deep loving kiss. 

********

Meredith grabs her suitcase and walks into Addison's gorgeous home. She admires the decor and style of Addison's place and then gasps when she sees the ocean from the porch. Addison smiles looking at the smile Meredith is presenting. They both walk towards the sliding glass door and Addison opens it. Meredith walks all the way to the beach and takes off her shoes. She rolls up her gray pants and steps inside the cold ocean water. Meredith looks up to the starry night with admiration. She realizes why Addison moved here after Seattle and even thinks about moving here instead. 

Addison sits on her reclining beach chair watching Meredith grasp in the beautiful sight. Suddenly all the tension and fright in Addison's body leaves just by Meredith's presence. She knows that woman is everything for her. Addison has now allowed herself to love Meredith fiercely and would do anything for her. 

Meredith walks deeper into the water and stops before the water reaches her cuffed pants. She briefly remembers the freezing water against her skin when she stopped fighting. She almost let her dark desires get the best of her and without everyone she would have lost that battle. She never wants to leave Addison that way. Addison completes Meredith like they were destined to be. Yes Derek was the love of her life but there was many things that weren't enough. 

Addison respects and admires Meredith's career as a world-class general surgeon. She even has a Catherine Fox award for christ sakes. Her reputation is top of the line and Meredith values that and feels the same way about Addison's career. They both understand each other's needs and wants and know when to give space. They both allow themselves to be vulnerable for the other and leave the facades at the door. They both were wounded by the same man and both went through severe trauma. 

Addison grew up in a cold household, her mother was a closeted lesbian who killed herself after her wife died and was cold to Addison, and her dad never truly tried to have a sustainable relationship. Meredith had a mother was more interested and involved in her own career and resented her for being a burden to her success, a father who left her and never tried to reconcile until the very last days of his life, and numerous amounts of near death experiences. Honestly both women almost have the same background just different lifestyles and personalities. Yet they complement each other in every way imaginable. 

Perhaps both women had their love of their life before but they were soulmates. They have a connection since the very beginning. It only continued to grow even if they were miles apart. It was that sort of bond that they could not escape. Addison tried to never see Meredith again but it was bound to happen and when it did they both were never the same. Each time they had an opportunity Addison never took it. Addison has had enough happen to her that she just wanted to settle and not take anymore risks. Meredith was ready to jump in at any given time before she married Derek and after he died. Eventually they were going to find themselves in each other's arms and never let go and that moment happened to be now. 

They went from living in secret to loving freely. Sure there's obstacles and gossip for the pair but together they manage to overcome it and grow stronger. That's why Meredith came to L.A. because she knew Addison would need support and love. She let her leave with Henry because this is her fight but she knew she had to come after they've settled down. She wants to be here for Addison. 

********

Addison is in her yale hoodie with her green pj bottoms laying down on her couch. Meredith is laying in between Addison's legs and resting her head on Addison's chest. She's wearing her old Dartmouth shirt and brown shorts. They ordered NY style pizza and are watching really bad reality TV. All of which is Addison's favorite. Addison has her arms wrapped around Meredith as they both watch the Real Houswives of New Jersey. 

Addison withdraws one of her hands from Meredith and reaches for the remote and turns off the TV. She shakes Meredith with her other hand to wake her up. Meredith rubs her eyes and sits up. Addison sits up as well, stretches her arms out, and yawns. She grabs Meredith by the hand and walks up the stairs with her. They both go into the restroom and brush their teeth. Meredith keeps bumping her shoulder into Addison's shoulder as she smirks with her toothbrush in her mouth. Addison sticks her free hand into the running water from the faucet and splashes the water into Meredith's face. Meredith spits into the sink and looks into Addison's eyes and gasps. They both giggle and finish brushing their teeth. 

They walk into Addison's yellow bedroom and pull the sheets out and get into bed together. Meredith lays on her side and Addison scoots closer to her to spoon her. The lights are off and all they hear is the sea moving softly. Meredith falls asleep first and starts to snore. Addison smiles and feels genuinely happy. She closes her eyes and falls asleep with her. 

*********

It's the night before Henry's custody battle and Addison is locked in her office talking to her lawyers and the brand new attorney she hired. Meredith walks up the stairs every ten minutes and places her ear by the door to hear but can't really make out what they're saying. She walks back down the stairs and sits out on the porch and repeats the cycle. Addison told her this morning that she knows what to do and has been on the phone with them for about two hours. Meredith doesn't know what plan Addison has formulated until she's midway up the stairs and Addison is leaning against the door of her office waiting for Meredith to come up. 

"You think I couldn't hear you coming up and down the stairs every five minutes?" Addison asks jokingly. 

Meredith laughs and walks up and kisses Addison on the cheek. Addison grabs her hand and walks her into her office. She sits on her desk and takes off her team from hold. 

"Okay are you ready?" Asks lawyer #1.

"Yes." Says Addison firmly. 

The call has another line ringing. Meredith is confused as to what is happening. Addison is scared but sure about what she's doing. 

"Hello. We are ready to hear you guys out." Says an unfamiliar voice which happens to be Jake's lawyer. 

"Hello Addison." Says Jake on the line as well. 

Meredith immediately glances up to Addison with a surprised look. Everything clicks in her head instantly to what Addison is going to do. She knew Addison was stuck and fighting with herself about Henry's life and what's best for him. Meredith always told her to take joint custody but Addison was too stubborn. Now she's seen Addison actually break from that stubbornness and do what's right for Henry. 

"Hello Jake. (Addison clears her throat before she continues to speak.) I am, excuse me, we are calling you both to talk about Henry. I know I've been constantly fighting you at every thing you have offered so far and I am sorry. I know I may be a little too late and have caused both of us to spend a tremendous amount of money and time for this custody battle. 

Jake we are here to offer you our deal instead of fighting in court. I want you to hear it out please and really think about it. Go ahead Lawrence."

Lawrence is Addison's attorney who is speaking and defending her at court. He speaks to propose their deal to Jake and his lawyer. "Mr. Reilly, we are prepared to offer you joint custody for Henry. My client wants school years with Henry and you can have summers. The holiday's would alternate every year and you would have spring break as well. How do you respond?"

The line stays quiet for a few moments. Addison has both her elbows on her desk as she supports her face up with her hands. Meredith is actively listening to the longing silence and looks at Addison's anxious eyes stare at the phone. 

"Addison. This is literally one of the deals we made you about a month ago. Except the spring break. What made you change your mind now?" Asks Jake.

"Bringing Henry over here and watching him suffer for not being able to be with you was something. He... he told me. (Addison looks up to the ceiling to keep her tears in and clears her throat once more.) He told me he hated me for taking him away and he wished everything went back to normal. Then there was th-"

"I accept your offer. Just as long as Henry stays with me through the week before you head back to Seattle." States Jake. 

"Well since we came to an agreement there's no need for court tomorrow. I will send over the paperwork to your emails and will let the judge know that there will be no court. Now I have to ask this, but are you both sure this is what you want to do?" Says Addison's second lawyer. 

"Yes." Both of them say at the same time. 

"Okay well thank you for your time and it was a pleasure working for you Ms. Montgomery and it was a pleasure talking with you Mr. Reilly. You'll both receive an email from us shortly. Good night." Says Addison's first lawyer. 

The call ends and Meredith grabs Addison's hand. Addison starts to let her tears fall knowing she just did what's best for Henry and not her. She stopped giving in to her selfish thoughts about keeping Henry away from Jake because in the end she would have hurt him more. He deserves to have his father around. She already changed his childhood forever, she doesn't want to be the reason he resents her when he grows up. She just hopes he understands this when he grows up. 

Her phone rumbles on her desk and it's Jake. She picks up and puts him on speaker but places her finger on her mouth to show Meredith to be silent. 

"Addison. I know it must have been hard for you to come to us with that offer. I just want to tell you that I appreciate that you reconsidered court and this unnecessary fight for our child's future. I just want to let you know you did the right thing in the situation we're in." 

"Jake no I'm sorry for elongating this to the extreme. I was the one who broke up our home and did damage I never wanted to do to Henry's life. But when he told me that, I knew I couldn't let my selfishness get in the way of his happiness and not my own. I am sorry for everything that has happened between us. It has been all my fault and I know you never expected us to end up here. Now there's nothing I can do to make up for the pain I've caused you but I really hope you can forgive me for the damage I've done to our lives."

"Addie. I can be very understanding and I value your apology deeply but it's going to take me some time to forgive you completely. That doesn't mean I'll never forgive you it just means I need a little more time. I don't hate you though, I just hate that things aren't the way I envisioned it. And lastly, I'm sorry for the hurtful things I told you in my old office. I knew I crossed a line and hit you where it hurts you the most. I am truly sorry for that and I immediately regretted it since it came out of my mouth but my anger towards you was overshadowing and clouding my judgement."

"Thank you Jake, truly. Thank you for being such a great man, for the life you gave me. For putting me back together and loving me. I know I hurt you when I chose Meredith. I never was honest to you about that part of my past until you found out. You deserve the world Jake and I'm sorry I couldn't be the one to settle down with you. But anyways thank you for being this amazing guy. Take care of Henry and tell him I love him. I'll pick him up before we fly home in four days. Take care."

Addison hangs up the phone and a wave of relief leaves her body. Meredith senses the change of the atmosphere after Addison ended the call. She knows Addison has found some peace to her guilt and she's glad Addison is owning up to her mistakes. Then her own guilt starts to hit her. Addison can feel the tension from Meredith's body and she gets out of her chair and walks over to Meredith. She pulls her out of her chair and hugs her. 

"Meredith you in no way caused this. I did the damage, not you, just me. If I were to have just accepted you earlier we would have not been here but hey life is a bitch and I was too stubborn and you know it. But I'm here now and I'm not going anywhere okay. You do not have to worry or feel guilty anymore. You heard that phone call. It's the best thing I can do for Henry given the fact or where we are. Henry loves the kids and they all connect. Jake isn't a problem nor will he try to interfere with us. That's the last of our unresolved issues." 

Addison cups Meredith's cheeks to make her face her. 

"Look at me. Meredith, that's it. All we have left is our wedding. We've officially started our lives together now all we have to do is make it official for each other. I can't wait to call you my wife Meredith." 

Meredith pulls Addison for a kiss and they lock lips for a moment. Meredith leans back into her embrace with Addison and they stand together for a while just registering what happened. 

"I love you Addie." Says Meredith into Addison's chest where her head is resting.

"I love you too Mer." Says Addison as she brushes her fingers along Meredith's lavender scented hair.


	47. Until the End of Times

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In which the happy couple join hands in marriage.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So sorry for the wait!!!! Next update will be very soon and will be the closing chapter. I really appreciated all feedback and comment so please share your thoughts on the story!

LAST CHAPTER SUMMARY

Addison called Jake to have Henry stay with him after a while of not being able to see his dad. Meredith shows up at her beach house in L.A. to help Addison with the custody battle that would have taken place in court. Yet Addison and her lawyers speak with Jake and his representative to agree on split custody for Henry. Meredith hears the final part of the phone call meeting and feels guilty for being the homewrecker in Henry's life. Addison speaks with her and makes her understand that she was never the cause of this but the thing that opened her eyes. 

Now they're on their way back to Seattle. 

/////////

Addison, Meredith, and Henry are all sitting in a row over in the first class aisle. They boarded the plane about 10 minutes ago and Addison felt pieces of her heart chip away while watching Henry say goodbye to Jake with such pain. Meredith stood by her side and rubbed her back as they watched from a distance. Addison felt her face get red and leaned her head on Meredith's head. Addison called out Henry and watched their last hug and felt uneasy. She signaled Meredith to stay with Henry when he came up to them. Addison walked over to Jake to say goodbye. 

"Thank you Jake. We're always a plane ride away. But thank you for being everything to me. I can't stop the pain or resolve the past but I just want to reiterate my love for you. I do love you but not the same way as you do. You're such a genuine man who helped me overcome so much and for that I'm grateful."

Addison places her hand on Jake's cheek as he looks into her eyes with despair. Her eyes start to water. 

"I want you to find happiness. I'm sorry I was not able to be that for you. I'm really sorry." Said Addison with a soft mellow voice. 

Jake wrapped his arms around her waist and pulled her into a deep hug. Addison gripped her arms around his back and let their powerful embrace take the moment. She broke from the hug first and started to walk away. She had an urge to turn around and stay with Jake but when she met Meredith's eyes everything went blank except those piercing blue eyes looking into her. She felt her smile widen so much by her gaze. She grabbed her hand and kissed her forehead as she grabbed Henry's hand as well and made their way to their gate. 

All of that takes place in Addison's mind as she overlooks the view from the window. The plane hasn't taken off yet but she already feels anxious to get back home. She turns to look at Meredith sitting next to her with a fixed stare at the ceiling and Henry asleep on Meredith's shoulder. 

The plane starts to roll over the speedway and Meredith grips the bottom of her seat to the point her knuckles start turning white. Her mind goes blank and her eyes are lost in space while her breathing becomes shallow and fast. Addison looks over again and notices Meredith's tension and pulls Meredith closer to her. She lifts the arm rest up and lets Meredith get closer to her body. She rests Meredith's head on her chest and and runs her hand over Meredith's scalp. With her other hand she holds one of Meredith's hands letting her squeeze it. 

Soon the plane is in the air and Meredith relaxes a little more. Addison leans her head down and plants a small peck on Meredith's head and looks back at the window. She rests her head by the side of the plane and hears Meredith's snores creep up. She smiles and falls asleep as well with Meredith wrapped in her and Henry wrapped in Meredith. She never felt so peaceful on plane until today. 

*********

Today is the day! It's been about 2 weeks after L.A. and the pair is in bed sound asleep. They have 2 weeks off work for their honeymoon and small intimate wedding tonight. Last night they decided to sleep in different rooms since Addison was a little superstitious but Meredith broke it and came back to their room and told Addison that she does not care because she's had years of bad luck already. After that they spooned each other and fell asleep in harmony. 

"Ow! Hey!" Says Addison loudly as she sits up on the bed. 

Ellis had just hit her with a pillow to wake her up and Henry hit Meredith as well but she just groaned. All the kids are by their bed and giggle seeing Addison confused.

"Today!" Yells Bailey. 

"Hmmm. Yes." Says Meredith softly as she sits up slowly. 

"Anyways we just wanted to wake you, bye." Says Zola with a lot of energy and runs away having the others follow her out.

Meredith throws herself back down on the bed and uses a pillow to cover her face. Its only 7am and she planned on waking up at 10am. Addison laughs and leans back down on her side to face Meredith. She starts to trail her fingers through Meredith's exposed midriff. Meredith moves the pillow away from her face and smiles widely at Addison. 

"Today IS the day." Blurts out Meredith. 

Addison continues to rub circles on her lower abdomen and nods to Meredith. 

"I still want my beauty sleep." States Meredith. 

Addison still runs her fingers along her toned stomach and nods once more. 

"Addie, respond. I can't read minds." Says Meredith in a serious tone. 

With a blink of an eye, Addison slips in two fingers inside Meredith who is already wet. This surprises Addison a little and makes her grow hot. She leans into the crook of Meredith's neck and places a wet kiss on the sensitive spot behind her ear. 

"Don't worry. You'll get to sleep after this. My treat." Whispers Addison into Meredith's ear and takes in Meredith's soft gasp for air. 

Addison moves her fingers along the rim of Meredith's opening and plunges her fingers deep inside her again. Meredith moans and covers her mouth realizing their door is wide open and the kids are awake. She looks at Addison who has a devilish smirk and raises her eyebrows at her. 

Addison pumps her fingers inside faster and watches Meredith unravel herself by her touch. Her head tilts back into the pillow and exposes her neck to her. Addison moves her lips from the edge of Meredith's neck to right under her chin. Meredith can't hold in her moans and sighs heavily instead. 

Her legs start to quiver implying she's close and Addison takes the hint. She quickens the pace and suddenly curls her fingers inside. The sensation of Addison's fingers hit her g-spot and the sensation rips through her body which causes her to moan loudly. Both women look alerted and face the door but don't see or hear the kids nearby. 

Addison slows the pace a little to give Meredith time to gather herself before she continues. 

"Someone wants to call out the kids attention." Whispers Addison seductively into Meredith's ear. 

Meredith starts to rock her hips on Addison's fingers for more attention. Addison steps up the speed and curls her fingers again and Meredith's face turns bright red as she tries to hold onto her moan. 

Addison knows Meredith is close again and she separates her two fingers and moves them inside her rapidly. Meredith grabs on to the sheets with a tight grip and cannot control herself for much longer. 

Addison's fingers separate into figure eight motions inside Meredith and she finally places her thumb on her clit. Meredith was aching for some friction on her throbbing clit. Addison rubs on it a few times and Meredith combusted almost immediately on her hand. Meredith lets out a deep loud sigh and looks at Addison in a daze. 

Addison slips out her fingers and sucks on the remnants of Meredith's finish. She winks at her and gets off the bed and walks over to the bathroom door. She turns around and looks at Meredith mischievously.

"You can go back to sleep. Take your beauty sleep. We can come back to this later." Says Addison with a smile as she walks into the bathroom and closes the door. 

Meredith smiles and her heart flutters. She loves Addison so much and cannot wait to finally be her wife. All of her emotions flood her mind and she turns over and peacefully falls asleep again. 

********

"Meredith, I mean. Wow. You look gorgeous!" Says Maggie as she walks into the master bedroom. 

Meredith stands in front of their full length mirror fixing the collar of her pant suit. She is wearing a white pantsuit with gold buttons. The blazer is closed and dips low showing off a little of her yellow lacy bra. She has a gold chain necklace around her collarbone and her hair is parted through the middle and curled. Her makeup was done and she was just applying her lipstick. She smiles really hard when Maggie comes behind her to get her ready.

Meredith puts her lipstick up and hugs Maggie. 

"Thank you. You look stunning too." Says Meredith.

"Pfft. No you do! And I can't believe today is the day!" Replies back Maggie.

Meredith paces around the room, a little nervous for their wedding. She really wishes that her people were here with her. Not that the people now around her are bad, she just misses the her persons. She wishes Cristina, Alex, and Lexie were here for her. But Maggie is an amazing sister and a person who has helped her through so much. She cannot imagine to be without Maggie even though it took her a long time to accept her. 

"Maggie, could you listen to my vows. I want this to be perfect for Addison." Asks Meredith.

"Yes Mer! I would love to!" Shouts Maggie emotionally.

**********

Addison is in the guest room getting ready. Her hair is voluminous and blown out to perfection with her crimson red signature lipstick. She's wearing a thick white dress that has a zipper in the front. She has the top lowered a little but not too much to expose her full breasts. All Addison is doing is sitting at the edge of the bed contemplating all of her life choices. 

"Addie? I came to tell you- Wow. Look at you! Looking as hot as ever! Damn please tell me you both are in an open relationship!" Spouts Amelia as she opens the door and walks in. 

Addison chuckles at Amelia's humor which she loves. She finally feels happy to have her sister here with her in open arms. 

"So what's buggin ya? Because from the looks of it, you don't seem too sure? Ready? Um? I could keep guessing but I'm pretty sure that would take us nowhere. If you need a getaway car just tell me." Asks Amelia 

"What! No no no. I'm just. I'm thinking. That's all." Shouts Addison surprised with Amelia's last statement. She pats her hand on the bed to signal Amelia to come sit next to her. 

"I'm just thinking about how this is my third wedding. But I've never felt so nervous in my life. I know she's going to say yes and I know I'm euphoric with her but the nerves have never been this much. I don't want to hurt her ever. All I want to do is love her with all of me."

"Addie, she's not going to runaway neither are you for that matter. Those nerves are good, wanna know why? Because, Addison. You love her, you love her so much that you never want to hurt her. You want everything to be perfect because honestly you are kinda of a perfectionist but anyways you're afraid of this. This true love you both have. That deep and powerful connection that two people share that can illuminate a whole room. Addie, I think you guys are soulmates."

"Wow Amelia. Sometimes you can be a child and sometimes you surprise me with your maturity. I do want everything to be perfect, so can you please listen to my vows and tell me if there's anything I need to change."

"Yes of course! Okay now spill." Exclaimed Amelia excited to hear Addison's vows.

********

Everyone gathers around their outdoor patio and backyard. Addison wanted a house with a big backyard so their kids could enjoy being outdoors, so naturally it came in handy to hold large crowds. Amelia and Maggie walk across the aisle and stand up by the podium as the maids of honor. 

The grass is very green and trimmed precisely for this occasion. A silk white carpet is rolled out on the aisle as the walkway for the pair. Each chair is wrapped with a shimmering silver ribbon that is tied as a perfect bow tie. The sun is out with a clear peaceful sky with no chance of rain. The weather is nice and cool to allow the ceremony to be outdoors with no extreme heat or cold. The main podium has four white pillars with a see-through roof cover. The front two pillars are wrapped with green vines and white flowers. Addison wants the decor to look simple yet elegant and she didn't let Meredith look at the plans. 

Addison did not invite The Captain but she did call Archer to tell him she's getting married to a woman. He took the news in shock but then congratulated her. Addison wished the people from her old practice could be here but she wanted this to be small so only local friends would be here. 

Both women are still inside the house and everyone outdoors is setting in to their seats after Amelia and Maggie came out. Addison walks out of the guest room and down the stairs. Her nerves is causing her to stress and think about the worst. What if the pillars fall? What if Meredith runs away? What if she runs away? What if... but everything settles in her mind when she sees Meredith walk down the stairs. Her mind goes blank seeing her woman. 

"Wow. Meredith. You look extremely gorgeous." Says Addison in awe as she lends out her hand to pull in Meredith into her embrace. 

For once Addison is about the same height as Meredith. Addison is wearing pointy flats since Meredith begged her so she could wear heels and almost reach her. Only Addison was about a few inches taller but overall they look and seem the same height. Addison grabs Meredith by the collar of her white blazer and pulls her in closer. 

"This suit really fascinates me." Says Addison with a devilish smirk. 

Meredith tugs Addison's front zipper and smiles at her. 

"Well you look spectacular. And this zipper is in the way of the most precious thing I know." Replies Meredith as she leans into her ear. 

Addison gets chills all over her skin because of Meredith's words. She grabs her upper back and side hip to bend her down. She kisses her beautiful lips and pulls her back up. 

"Now let's go and get married. Our guests are waiting." States Addison with a wide smile spread across her face. 

They hold hands and walk out the sliding door to their backyard. They each grab their bouquet set on a table and signal the string quartet set by the front. Everyone hears the music and they all stand noticing the pair approach them. 

They walk down the aisle together with their fingers intertwined with each others. Addison smiles when she sees Bailey and Meredith smiles when she sees Richard. They reach the steps of the podium and face the justice of the peace. Both women hand their bouquets to their sister as everyone settles into their seats. 

"We have all gathered on this beautiful day to witness a celebration of love and unity between Addison Forbes Montgomery and Meredith Grey. They have both taken a step to further their fulfilling relationship into loving matrimony. Now each woman has prepared vows and I will let Meredith Grey share first as she requested." 

Addison eyes light up hearing Meredith wants to go first. Meredith grabs Addison's other hand and faces her as she holds both of her hands. Her eyes are glowing and she is radiant at this very moment. Her heart is full just staring into her blonde beauty. Meredith takes a deep breath and lets out a deeper sigh. 

"Addison Adrienne Forbes-Montgomery, I can stand here and recite the traditional vows said at weddings but I want to give you the Grey version of vows." 

Everyone laughs at Meredith's statement. 

"We met under unfortunate circumstances since I was your ex-husband's girlfriend who then became my husband who happened to leave earth pretty early. I really thought I would never love again but from the moment we started to interact, I knew there was something between us that we couldn't escape. 

We loved each other from the start yet life isn't fair, I should know. We both went on to form different lives in different places yet a piece of my heart always remained locked off for you. Once every blue moon you'd come to the hospital and we'd share moments that I hold dearly to this day. But we lost touch and grew apart. Yet the day you came back into my vicinity, I realized I couldn't bear to see you leave again. 

You opened up my eyes Addison. You have loved every single part of me. The crazy, impulsive, and erratic behavior yet also my loving, sweet, and caring side. You have treated me as an equal since day one and have always respected me as a colleague rather than undermine me even with that patient from my intern year who went off on me. You stood up for me and made it impossible for me to hate you. 

We never found the perfect time to be with each other until this very moment. I want every possible minute that I have on this earth to be shared with you and all of our kids. I can stand here and promise you the rest of our lives but we both know things don't always go that way. But that doesn't mean I can't try to live my longest to be here with you. 

I love you so much that I will go to the ends of this earth to be with you. I don't want to live another second without being married to you Addison. So I'm here right now, holding your hands, and telling you that I'm here to love you and cherish you. I will be here for you whenever you need. I am giving you my whole heart because Addison, you need to be loved fiercely and fully. I want to be your greatest love so please accept all of me to be your wife until the end of times." 

Everyone claps and Meredith lets tears of happiness fall from her eyes. Addison pulls one of her hands away and wipes Meredith's tears away with her soft hands. She grabs her hand again and turns to the justice of the peace.

"That was a wonderful set of vows said by Meredith Grey. Now may we all turn our attention to Addison Montgomery who will share her vows." 

"Meredith Grey, there are no words that can demonstrate how much I love you. I always knew I was missing something in my life until I started to connect with you. You opened my eyes and made me realize that you are my greatest love. You are my soulmate that I have searched for. You always viewed me as someone who had their life together and when I came clean to my life being a mess, you didn't run. If anything you tried to beat me and say your life was harder. 

At first I would bury my feelings for you because I couldn't come to terms with my affection. You loved me when I couldn't. You have made me feel emotions I have never felt before for anyone. And when I left for Los Angeles I knew I left of piece of my heart here in Seattle. I tried to forget you and pretend what we had wasn't everything but man was I wrong. 

You are the person I never knew I wanted yet can't live without. My life isn't complete without you and my biggest fear was accepting that. I had many opportunities to love you and stay but I have had difficulties taking risks for people and I wanted to settle. But seeing you again and feeling free by your side has been clarifying to me. I was never going to find someone who could replicate what we have. And when you found me I couldn't see it the way I see it now. I wasted valuable years without you but when I just look at you now there's no place or time I'd rather be. 

Every minute with you is a gift that no one else can give me. The love I have for you is more than I can explain. My heart beats for you Meredith Grey and I promise to love you and only you for as long as I live. I love every single thing about you. You know me better than I know myself and love me for who I am even with all the baggage I carry. You have even given me the opportunity to share your kids in my life and unite our families. I always wanted to have a big family and you have given me that. 

Meredith, I stand here looking into your gorgeous blue eyes and cannot imagine a place I'd rather be than here. I give you my heart and love and ask that you accept me as your wife until the end of times because I can't live without you."

Addison's heart beats so hard it almost breaks through her chest. She's proud of herself for not crying but the sight of Meredith's watery eyes change that. Meredith squeezes her hands and mouths 'I love you' to her and Addison starts to tear up. 

"What beautiful vows said by Addison Montgomery. Now can we have the rings delivered to the podium by the ring bearers?"

Zola steps out of her seat with Meredith's ring on a red suede pillow. She walks up to Addison and holds up the pillow to her. Addison takes the ring and says, "Thank you Zola." Zola gives her a quick hug and walks back to her seat. 

Henry steps out of his seat with Addison's ring on a red suede pillow exactly the same as the other one. He holds it up with one hand and Meredith takes the ring. Meredith says, "Thank you Henry." He winks at her and walks back to take his seat. 

"As both of you hold the ring of your partner, I ask that you place the ring on their left ring finger." 

Meredith grabs Addison's left hand with her left hand and gently slides her ring down her long delicate finger. Addison then turns their hands over to make Meredith's hand face upwards. She glides the ring down her soft finger and smiles. They both face the justice of the peace and nod. They let go and grab both hands instead to face each other directly. 

"By joining hands, you are promising to honor, love and support each other for the rest of your lives. Take in this moment as the beginning of a new leaf into a beautiful marriage. We are all here to watch you bind together as one connected matrimony.

Meredith Grey, do you take Addison Montgomery to be your lawfully wedded wife?" 

"I do!" 

"Addison Montgomery, do you take Meredith Grey to be your lawfully wedded wife?"

"I do!"

"By the power vested in me by the laws of the state of Washington, I now pronounce you as happily married wives. You may now kiss the bride!"

Meredith is quick to let go and grab Addison by the waist and pull her into a kiss. Addison cups Meredith's face and tilts her head to deepen the kiss. This is their ultimate kiss. Sparks illuminate the darkness of their closed eyes as their lips lock between them. The world stops moving and becomes silent. Suddenly they are the only people in this world. Time disappears and every nerve tingles in each of their bodies as they get lost in the moment. They both pull back and stare into each other's eyes. Both of them are like shining stars glowing with love. 

They face the crowd and hear the loud applause and cheers from their friends that have gathered here to watch them get married. Meredith grabs Addison's hand and lifts it up in the air and the commotion get louder. 

"Thank you so much for joining us today! Now please feel free to walk inside or around the yard and enjoy the champagne and food set in the kitchen!" Shouts Meredith. 

Addison tugs on her hand and looks at Meredith mischievously. 

"You're finally my wife." States Addison. 

"Wow so possessive. But now you're finally my wife." Replies Meredith as she kisses her cheek.

They hold hands and walk indoor without letting go. Finally united as wives.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thank you for reading! If you want more MerAdd please check out my other story, Sunsets & Sunflowers. It's a different take on this ship! 
> 
> Please share your thoughts and feelings!

**Works inspired by this one:**

  * [Carry Me Home](https://archiveofourown.org/works/25253233) by [bobbiejelly](https://archiveofourown.org/users/bobbiejelly/pseuds/bobbiejelly)
  * [The Eight-Or-So Men Who Had Enjoyed Seeing Addison Montgomery Naked](https://archiveofourown.org/works/25298800) by [bobbiejelly](https://archiveofourown.org/users/bobbiejelly/pseuds/bobbiejelly)
  * [Gratitude](https://archiveofourown.org/works/25848853) by [bobbiejelly](https://archiveofourown.org/users/bobbiejelly/pseuds/bobbiejelly)




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